Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

Your Drive-Thru Attempt Is See-Thru

, | USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Money

(I am running the drive-thru window, taking money and handing out food during a busy lunch hour.)

Me: “Hi, your total is $12.95, please.”

Woman: “Aw, crap. I forgot my wallet at home.”

Me: *to coworker* “Oh, should I void the order, then?”

Woman: *overhears through the open window* “What? I only live a block away? Just give me the food, and I’ll come back and pay.”

Me: “Uh, I don’t think I can do that.”

Coworker: “Yeah, we can’t do that.”

Woman: “Seriously? My kids are hungry. Get your manager.”

(I find the manger and explain the situation.)

Manager: *laughs* “Are you kidding? How do you know she’d come back to pay?”

Me: “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

Manager: “Even if she did, we’re counting the money in the registers right now, and we’d come up over ten dollars short.”

Me: *to the woman* “I’m sorry, but I asked my manager, and she said we can’t do that. We’re counting the money in the registers, and not having the money for your order would mess us up.”

Woman: “What? The [Same Restaurant Franchise on the other side of town] always lets me do that!” *thinks for a second, looks at sodas in drink holder on the counter* “Well, can you just give me the drinks?”

Me: “No.”

Woman: “So, I seriously have to drive home, and wait in the drive-thru line again?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but yes.”

(We voided the order, but kept her food warm in the kitchen, and fifteen minutes later, she was back. I took her order again, and also cashed her out at the window. Throughout the entire transaction, she was extremely rude. At the window, she glared at me. When she was cashed out, she demanded extra ketchup, BBQ, and mayo packets, which we are supposed to charge extra for. I was too afraid to ask her to pay, so she ended up with about $1 worth of free sauces.)

You’ll Find The Trump-Supporter’s Menu Outside

, | MA, USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Food & Drink

(It’s a slow day at the cash register when an elderly man and his grandson walk up to the counter. The grandfather gives their order but then notices the rainbow bracelet on my wrist as I go to take their payment.)

Grandpa: “Are you gay, son?”

(He points derisively at the bracelet.)

Me: “Yes, I am, but I’m not ashamed and—”

Grandpa: “Good God, they let you people touch food?”

Me: “Sir—”

Grandpa: “Don’t you ‘sir’ me, you f****** [homosexual slur]!”

Me: “That was uncalled for.”

Grandpa: “What’s uncalled for is you trying to turn my grandson gay.”

Me: “I assure you, sir, that’s not—”

Grandpa: “Back in my day we had values. Now there’s a [slur] as our president and [slur]s touching our food. This is why America is going down the s***er, because [slur]s like you think it’s cool to be a f****** [slur].”

Me: *biting my tongue* “Would you like to speak with my manager?”

Grandpa: “Yeah, I would! And I’ll ask him what sort of idiot he is for hiring a [slur] like you”

(My manager is a woman. She comes over.)

Manager: “What’s the problem here?”

Grandpa: “Your employee’s a [slur].”

Manager: *matter-of-factly* “Yes, he is.”

Grandpa: “This is a family restaurant. You can’t have [slur]s working here!”

Manager: “I can, and I do. But you’re right, sir, this is a family restaurant. As a result, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

(Grandpa stands there stunned, and the whole time the poor kid looks like he’s about to cry.)

Manager: “Your grandson is still welcome as he’s not the problem, but you aren’t allowed back in here. Have a good day.”

(Baffled and so angry he couldn’t speak, the grandpa dragged the boy out by his arm.)

No Point Crying Over Ruined Milk

| England, UK | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging

(I work at a breakfast bar in a hotel and have just given a guest the tea he ordered. He sneers at it.)

Me: “Is there a problem, sir?”

Guest #1: “You didn’t put milk in it.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t hear you ask.”

Guest #1: “I didn’t, but who doesn’t have milk in their tea?! It’s disgusting!”

Me: “I don’t.”

Guest #2: “Me, too.”

Coworker: “And me. I hate milk in general.”

Me: “If you don’t ask for milk we assume you want it black.”

Guest: *looking thoroughly aghast* “You SAVAGES!”

(The guest stomped over to the pitchers reserved for cereal, intending to use them for his tea. You could see the idea form in his head, though, and instead he picked up a pitcher and dumped his tea into it. He glared at us triumphantly before going to sit down. He was there for another hour, and whenever one of us walked past or looked at him, he grinned as though he had won some sort of battle. However, of the times he didn’t notice us we saw him struggling to consume his milk with tea seasoning. Once he was gone we searched for the pitcher, assuming he might have taken it with him. We found it behind a plant in the corner, with less than a tenth of it consumed. Such a waste!)

This Roast Is Toast

| UK | Food & Drink

(I work at a pub with a Sunday Roast carvery buffet. A vegetarian customer comes to order.)

Customer: “Can I pay for the roast, but can I just have the potatoes? I’m a vegetarian.”

Me: “Yes, but… you know the potatoes are roasted with the juice from the meat.”

Customer: “They are?”

Me: “Yes, that’s how most people roast them.”

Customer: *alarmed* “They do?”

Me: “Erm… yes… We do have some vegetarian dishes though.”

Customer: “Do most people really roast potatoes that way?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Oh. Right.”

(I will never forget this poor girl’s expression as she began thinking about ALL the roast potatoes she’d ever eaten.)

Giving Them Something To Wine About

| The Netherlands | Bad Behavior, Criminal & Illegal, Food & Drink

(I work at a casual restaurant. Every month our restaurant carries a specialty wine, and every table has one bottle on it for decoration, together with a sign explaining the grapes and the origin of the wine. This month’s wine is a crisp French Chardonnay, best enjoyed cold. It’s August and it’s insanely hot outside. Two ladies are sitting at a table in the corner, and at one point I notice one of the ladies grab the decorative wine bottle, refilling her and her friend’s glasses. The bottle’s empty. Then she sneakily hides the bottle behind the potted plant on the table. I decide to approach.)

Me: “Ladies?”

Woman #1: *tipsy* “Oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that, you know. It was out of habit!”

Me: “If you wanted another glass of wine you should have just asked. We’ll have to charge you €18 for that bottle.”

Woman #2: “Don’t you take that tone with me! You know what? I liked you right up until now. You gave us great service but this is just ridiculous!”

Me: “Excuse me? I’m being the ridiculous one here?”

Woman #2: “It’s ridiculous! And your wine is disgusting anyway. IT’S ALL WARM!”

(Yes, it was very odd that a bottle of wine that had been out for a week in sweltering hot weather was warm and undrinkable. The best part — after they had left, Woman #1 came back. She pulled another full bottle of wine out of her purse, that she had stolen from another table, and gave it back to me. She said her friend had put her up to doing it but she felt badly…)

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