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Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

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No Meat In Their Brain, Part 5

| UK | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Popular

(Working at a popular fast food restaurant, I get a customer come up to my till.)

Me: “Hi, can I take your order?”

Customer: “Just a cheeseburger, please.”

(I tell him the price, take the money, and give him his burger. The customer comes rushing back looking sick.)

Me: “Is everything all right?”

Customer: “I asked for a f***ing cheese burger.”

Me: “Yes, that’s what I gave you.”

Customer: “This has meat on it. I’m a f***ing vegetarian; I wanted just the cheeseburger.”

Me: “All burgers come with meat unless asked to be removed.”

Customer: “You should have known because I asked for a CHEESE burger.”

Me: “Yes, I know, but that comes with beef unless stated like I just said.”

Customer: “F*** YOU.”

(He storms out leaving the half-eaten burger and I’m left confused as to why we wouldn’t have meat on our burgers.)

Related:
No Meat In Their Brain, Part 4
No Meat In Their Brain, Part 3
No Meat In Their Brain, Part 2

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Too Chicken To Pay Full Price

| Wareham, MA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I’m pulling chickens out of our oven. It’s a busy day, so we’re all sold out of our older batch. A regular comes in and I recognize her as the woman who always comes in and asks for, as she calls them, “three hour limit chickens,” as in after they’ve been out of the oven for three hours, since they get marked down to half-price.)

Me: “Good evening, ma’am! I’m sorry, I know you like your half-off chickens, but it’s been a busy day so we are all sold out of the older batch.”

Customer: “I’ll wait.”

Me: “Unfortunately, all we have right now are these chickens I’m pulling out of the oven right now, so it would be quite a wait.”

Customer: “Oh, then give me whatever you have.”

Me: “You’d like a fresh one? Sure thing!”

Customer: “No, I want a half-off one!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, there are no half-off chickens left. All we have are the fresh.”

Customer: “Then give me the cheapest, freshest ones you got.”

(I show her what I have and she picks the ones she wants. About five minutes later, she comes back.)

Customer: “I think we misunderstood each other; I wanted half-off chickens!”

Me: *stunned for a moment* “Uh… Ma’am, I apologize, but as I explained we don’t have any chickens left that have been out of the oven long enough to get marked down, only the fresh ones that aren’t ready to be marked down.”

Customer: “Then I’m putting them back!”

(She put them all on the warmer and walked away.)

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I Am Number Four

| Portland, OR, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Popular

(My best friend and I are working together at a popular Mexican restaurant. It is early-ish in the morning on a Sunday, so we are the only two on shift. She is taking orders on drive-thru and counter, and I am making the food. It’s very slow and we are only getting roughly one or two customers every half hour, so it’s an easy morning. A gentleman walks in the front doors and orders four tacos and a side of potatoes. I am standing right behind the registers and hear his order, so by the time he’s paid for his items, I almost have all his food ready. He is the only customer we have. Here is the exchange I hear between him and and my friend:)

Cashier: “Your order will be ready in just a moment.”

Customer: “What’s my order number?”

Cashier: “You don’t need an order number. You are the only customer.”

Customer: *ignoring her, raising his voice* “How am I supposed to get my order without an order number?”

(I have finished making his food now and I am putting all his items on the tray. I think he’s kidding, but after glancing over my shoulder I see his face is red with anger and confusion.)

Customer: “Well? How hard is it to give me my ORDER NUMBER!”

Cashier: “Okay, your order number is… four”.

Customer: *looking as if he’s just fought a battle* “Okay, then!”

(At that moment I turn around and put the tray on the front counter. He has not even had a chance to turn to go to the drink machine to pour his beverage. My friend/cashier grabs his tray so he can’t grab it.)

Cashier: *with the belligerent customer directly in front of her* “NUMBER FOUR! NUMBER FOUR! NUMBER FOUR, YOUR ORDER IS READY! NUMBER FOUR!”

(He angrily took his tray and sat in the totally empty dining room. I had to go the back to avoid laughing at the whole scene.)

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Severely Lacking In Awesome Sauce

| MO, USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal & Illegal, Food & Drink, Popular, Wild & Unruly

(I am closing drive-thru. We have packets of our signature sauce for drive-thru customers, but we also have pumps of it out in the lobby. Due to health code regulations, we’re not allowed to use the pumps for serving to customers.)

Customer: “Hey, do you mind if I get [Sauce]?”

Me: “Sure, no problem.” *I try to hand her some packets*

Customer: “Actually, can you put some sauce in a side cup for me from the pump in the lobby?”

(After explaining the health code to her, she suddenly gets very unreasonable.)

Customer: “What do you mean it’s unsanitary?! I’m going to go in there, dump out all of the sauce onto the floor, and make you replace it.”

(I have no patience after a long night.)

Me: “Well, you’re welcome to try, but you’ll be leaving in handcuffs.”

(At this point she just sped off.)

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Largely Never Satisfied

| MO, USA | Food & Drink

(I am working as a cashier on front counter. The customer has ordered a large Reuben combo and another Reuben sandwich on the side. I hand her her food, which she takes only to return a couple seconds later.)

Customer: “Where’s my drink and fries for the other Reuben?”

Me: “You just ordered the sandwich, ma’am. There’s no drink or fries for that.”

Customer: “No, I want it EXACTLY like the other one.”

(After calling my manager over, I ring her up for another large combo meal and have it made free for the lady.)

Customer: “Why is this large? I didn’t say that I wanted it large?”

Me: *all I can do is just stare at the customer in disbelief*

(Finally, my manager took over and told me to go run orders.)

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