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Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

H2-Slow, Part 8

, | Ottawa, ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(An ‘Iced Cappuccino’ is a popular beverage at a particular fast food chain all across Canada. It’s made with a very sugary syrup and ice.)

Customer #1: “I’d like an iced cappuccino please.”

Me: “Sure thing. Anything else?”

Customer #1: *turns to friend* “Do you want one?”

Customer #2: *looking horrified* “Oh, my goodness, definitely not. I’ll just have a water, please!”

Customer #1: “Oh, I thought you liked those?”

Customer #2: *dead serious, looking appalled* “I will NEVER drink those again, I JUST found out that they have more fat in them then water! Can you believe that!?”

Customer #1: “…Um.”

Customer #2: “Shocking, right? I just found out!” *turns to me* “Can you believe that!?”

Me: “…Um.”

Customer #2: *to me, scolding voice* “You guys should really be advertising that to your customer… Iced cappuccino’s have more fat than water.”

Related:
H2Slow, Part 7
H2Slow, Part 6
H2Slow, Part 5

On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 9

, | USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Health & Body

(I am in high school. I work at a fast food restaurant. Part of the uniform includes a hat or visor. On this day I am taking orders at the front register. I am handing back change to an older male customer who has been normal so far.)

Me: “Okay, sir, here is your change and your order will be ready in a sec.”

(I then go to take the next customer’s order when the older man grabs the brim of my hat and looks me directly in the eyes.)

Older Man: “Oh, I thought you had brown eyes.”

(A coworker then places his food on the tray and the man walks away without another word.)

Next Customer: “I promise I won’t touch you. I just want a burger.”

Related:
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 8
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 7
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 6

Another Way To Water The Plants

| TX, USA | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink

(My dad is the customer in this one. He strongly dislikes lemon in water, which of course is a standard way of serving it in many restaurants. He’s noted that if he just says, “No lemon, please,” it often shows up with lemon anyway — servers are human, and it’s easy to forget a request and do it your standard way. He could just take it out, but he feels that it makes the water bitter, so rather than be THAT guy and insist on a new glass when this happens, he’s come up with a way to make the request memorable and thereby end up with un-lemoned water in the first place. I have to admit that it almost always works, and often gets a grin, but one young lady turned the tables on him.)

Me: “I’ll have a [Diet Soda].”

Dad: “I’ll have water, with no fruits and no vegetables in it.”

(A couple minutes later, back comes our waitress, with my soda, and a glass of water … with a big ol’ stalk of broccoli stuck in it! She puts the drinks down, just like this is completely normal, starts to turn away, and then stops and snaps her fingers.)

Waitress: “Oh, that’s right! You were the one who wanted no vegetables!”

(And then while we were dying laughing, she took it away and brought the fruit-and-veggie-free water originally asked for. Definitely the best response ever to his little shtick.)