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Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

A Very Crisp Line

, | Tempe, AZ, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I work the opening shift at a fast food restaurant that’s well-known for their chicken. We have an elderly, regular customer who is originally from the New England area, as made obvious by both her accent and attitude. Every week, she has a new complaint. These are some of my favorites.)

Me: “Good morning, [Regular]! What can I get for you today?”

Regular: “I wanna get a number three with the bacon EXTRA crispy. Last week, you guys didn’t make it extra crispy like I like it!”

Me: “Sorry about that. I’ll make sure it gets made correctly this time.”

(The next week:)

Me: “Good morning, [Regular], having the usual today?”

Regular: “Yeah, but make sure the bacon isn’t too crispy. You guys made it WAAAY to crispy last time.”

Me: “I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize they had burnt it!”

Regular: “It wasn’t burnt, just too crispy. I want it extra crispy, but not TOO crispy.”

Not Feline This Sub

, | ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Pets & Animals

(I work in a popular sandwich shop.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like a tuna sub please.”

(I make the sandwich and the customer pays and leaves. Forty minutes later the customer comes back with an oddly mulled sandwich.)

Customer: “Hi, I’d like to exchange this for a new sub.”

Me: “I’m sorry. Was there something wrong with the tuna?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Then what’s wrong with it?”

Customer: “I brought it home and went to get something done. I came back to the kitchen and my cat was on the table eating it.”

Me: *blinking in shock* “I’m sorry, sir, but we aren’t responsible for your pets eating your food…”

Customer: “YOU SHOULD REPLACE THIS! THE SANDWICH IS DAMAGED AND I CAN’T EAT IT! YOU SHOULD REPLACE IT!”

(I can be very sarcastic when annoyed.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we can’t. We can, however, see about getting your cat its own sub card.”

(The customer proceeded to throw the sub, which was filled with cat hair, on the counter and scream at my me, threatening to call corporate on me before storming out. If the cat was rating the sub we’d have gotten two paws up because most of it was gone.)

Wasn’t So Chipper About Leaving

| OH, USA | Criminal & Illegal, Food & Drink

(I work as a sales associate at a store where vendors control some of our shelf layouts. One day a man working for the chip company comes in.)

Me:“Hello, sir, do you need my manager?”

Vendor #1: “No, I just came to reset your shelves. We just changed the layout.”

(I don’t think anything of it and go back to work while the guy moved product around on the shelf. He left after about an hour. The next day another guy from the company comes in and begins stocking the shelves. After a while he calls out to me.)

Vendor #2: “How come your chip aisle is so messed up?”

Me: *confused* “One of your guys reset it.”

Vendor #2: “This isn’t how they’re supposed look and I’m the only guy who works this area.”

(The vendor reset the shelves and we later found out that an ex-employee kept his uniform and pretended to work at the company to steal chips.)