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Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

Popcorn Folorn

| Napa, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I am serving popcorn to customers. It’s kind of slow since it’s close to closing. A customer comes up to me and my co-worker:)

Customer: “Hey, don’t you guys have free popcorn after nine?”

Me: “Uh… no.”

Coworker: “Yeah, no.”

Customer: “Oh, I mean after 9:15, and oh, look, it’s 9:15.”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “No? D***!” *walks out of the theatre*

Coworker: “What just happened?”

Needs An Urban Remedy

| Halifax, NS, Canada | Food & Drink, Funny Names

(Unfortunately, I am the stupid customer in this story.)

Employee: “Hi there! What can I get for you today?”

Me: “Hi! Could I just get a toasted plain bagel with cream cheese?”

Employee: “Sure! What kind of cheese?”

Me: “…cream?”

Employee: *laughs* “I meant what kind of cream cheese would you like?”

Me: “Oh! What flavours do you have?”

Employee: “Plain, strawberry, blueberry, and herb and garlic.”

(At this point, I am tired after a day of classes and mishear the last flavour.)

Me: *stares blankly* “Urban garlic?… Is that, like, the opposite of ‘rural garlic’ or something?”

Talking Turkey About The Chickens

| PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

Customer: “Does your chicken and turkey come from the same animal?”