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Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

Literally Milked Dry

| London, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(This is a conversation overheard between my coworker and two customers. Customer #1 is male and at the front of the queue, and has rather a large order of coffees. Customer #2 is behind him, a smaller woman who appears to be waiting impatiently. Our coffee machine on the bar is one of the typical barista-style ones with the nozzle for foaming the milk in a jug.)

Customer #1: *to my coworker* “So, I’ll have two cappuccinos.”

(My coworker makes them.)

Customer #1: “And two more, please.”

(My coworker makes them.)

Customer #1: “And a black coffee.”

(My coworker makes it.)

Customer #1: “And a tea.”

(My coworker makes it.)

Customer #1: “And three more cappuccinos. Sorry, love.”

(My coworker makes them. Thankfully after this, the customer decides that’s more than enough coffee for his group, and pays. Unfortunately, what with it being a very busy show, us being only a small bar, and his having ordered so many coffees, we have already run out of milk. My coworker turns to Customer #2 at this point and greets her.)

Coworker: “Good evening. What can I get you?”

Customer #2: “One cappuccino please.”

(My coworker explains to her that we are currently out of milk because of the large order she just took. The look on the woman’s face turns to pure rage.)

Customer #2: “WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU DON’T HAVE ANY MILK?!”

(The entire room stops and falls silent.)

Customer #2: *still shouting* “I NEED MY COFFEE. WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THIS?!”

(My coworker is biting back the urge to retort, judging by her face. I decide to step in.)

Me: “I’m sorry, madam, but my coworker just explained to you the situation. We can either make you a tea and get you some milk sachets from the lower bar, or we can send you there to get filter coffee.”

Customer #2: *turns to me* “Oh, FORGET IT! You stupid people, not having any milk! This is ridiculous!”

Me: “Madam, you have shouted at my coworker and me, and insulted us. I am refusing you service in this bar for the entire evening. Please leave.”

(Customer #2 shoots me a dirty look and storms out. As she does so, a few of the patrons applaud. Customer #1 approaches the bar.)

Customer #1: “If I had known she was going to be that nasty without coffee I would willingly have given up one of mine. Glad I didn’t have to, though!”

(He left a £5 tip!)

No Will For A Refill

| MO, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers

(I’m currently at the register because the manager on shift doesn’t like to be up there all day. I normally don’t mind too much, and he’ll put someone else on if I’m just not feeling it. It is getting late and we have several customers in the store when the manager comes up and leans in close, which is always a sign that he’s talking about a customer.)

Manager: *whispering* “There’s a man in a baseball cap with a frozen refill in a mug and he’s going to say it’s ice.”

(After he says that he gets off the register to return to the store and I wait for the man in question. After a couple of minutes a man fitting the description comes up with a fifty two ounce mug and says it is an ice refill.)

Me: “My manager just told me that that is a frozen refill.”

Man: *getting grumpy* “No, it’s ice.”

Me: “If it’s ice, could you open it and show me?”

Man: “Fine, just take it!”

(He shoved the mug at me, luckily not knocking it off the counter, before he stormed out of the store. I double-checked that, yes, the mug was filled with one of our frozen drinks. A few minutes later my manager came back up and told me that the man saw him and threatened ‘to get him.’ All of this over a dollar-something refill that we caught him trying to filch.)

Milking The Return Policy

| Ottawa, ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I work at a small local grocery store and our return policy is quite generous, but some people take it too far.)

Me: “Hi, there! How are you today?”

Customer: “Hi, paper bags.”

Me: “Okay. Did you find what you were looking for?”

Customer: “Yes.” *pulls out a carton of almond milk* “If my son doesn’t like this can I return it?”

Me: “Well, unless it is unopened or there is something physically wrong with it we can’t accept a return simply because your son doesn’t like it.”

Customer: “Why not? If I buy this and he doesn’t like the taste it’s not my fault, so I should be able to get my money back.”

Me: “Let me get a manager for you, ma’am…”