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Category: Family & Kids

Your Friendly Neighborhood Customer Service

| NJ, USA | Awesome Workers, Family & Kids, Geeks Rule

(I work in the video games department of a large toy store. We are doing a promotion for one of the Spider-Man movies. They hire an actor who dresses up as Spider-Man and gives out autographs. I snuck an autograph from him in during my lunch break and the actor goes home in the afternoon. After ringing up the last customer, a young boy comes up to the register with his dad. He has a Spider-Man jacket and a t-shirt.)

Dad: “Hey, we’re here to see Spider-Man. Do you know where he is?”

Me: “Oh! I’m sorry but he left an hour ago.”

(Immediately the boy looks sad and the dad smiles apologetically to his son.)

Dad: “I’m so sorry, [Son] Maybe we’ll see him next time?”

(By now, the son is about to cry. I see the autograph under my register and quickly come up with a story.)

Me: “Oh, [Son], right? Spider-Man told me all about you! He had a lot of crime to fight today but he told me to give this to you. He’s very proud of you and he wished he could have met his biggest fan in person! I’m really glad I found you!”

(I gave him the autograph and his eyes lit up. They thanked me repeatedly while I rung up their purchase and I watched the boy leave with an extra skip in his step. I never liked working in retail but this was one of my favorites. I was more than happy to brighten his day!)

Will Likely Want Something For Three

| NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal & Illegal, Family & Kids

(I am a teenage girl. Over the summer and on school breaks, I work part-time as a receptionist in a hair salon run by a family friend in a Jersey Shore resort town. It is a slow Thursday morning in early September when the phone rings. I stop folding towels to answer it.)

Me: “[Salon], [My Name] speaking. How can I help you?”

Caller: “I would like to lodge a formal complaint.”

(We have no protocols for formal complaints. We are a tiny salon and our clientele are mostly friends of my boss and locals.)

Me: “All right, how can I help you?”

Caller: “My son, [Name], was booked for an appointment this morning at 8:30 and the shop wasn’t open yet!”

(My boss sometimes comes in a little late, but our limited clientele are very understanding. Obviously, this woman isn’t.)

Me: “I’m very sorry about that, ma’am. Would you like to reschedule your son’s appointment?”

Caller: *ignoring me* “I just don’t understand why you would book us for an appointment when no one is going to be there! My son walked there by himself very early in the morning, and it’s very dangerous on the roads!”

Me: “I’m very sorry about that, ma’am. We have open times this afternoon if you’d like to reschedule [Name]’s appointment.”

Caller: “MY SON IS THREE YEARS OLD! HE SHOULDN’T BE THERE IF NO ONE ELSE IS!”

Me: “If your son is three years old, why did he walk across dangerous, heavily-trafficked roads by himself?”

Caller: “HOW DARE YOU, YOU LITTLE B****! I HOPE YOU DIE!” *click*

Es-pwñ-ol, Part 3

| Newark, NJ, USA | Family & Kids, Language & Words, Technology

(I’m with my mother buying a pouch and a case for my brothers hand-held gaming system. I go off on my own to find some computer games. Not even five minutes later I return to my mom looking very flustered with an employee. My mother and I are Peruvian. She speaks Spanish and struggles with English.)

Me: *in Spanish* “Ma, are you okay?”

Mom: *in Spanish* “No, I can’t remember the stupid name for this s***. The thing that covers the DS for you brother, what is it?”

Me: *to the employee, in English* “Oh, my mom is looking for a cover for the 3DS. Do you have any?”

Employee: “Yes, I showed your mom the selection right here; these are the ones we have.”

Me: *in Spanish* “Ma, they only have these.”

Mom: *in Spanish* “No, this f****** idiot isn’t understanding me! I want the ones in foam because your brother keeps breaking the plastic ones.”

Employee: *in Spanish* “I’m sorry, ma’am, I know what you want. They’re over here at the next aisle.”

(My mom turned a deep shade of red and mumbled out an apology, saying she was flustered and couldn’t control her temper. I was laughing so hard because I’m always telling my mom that just because she thinks they can’t understand her Spanish and talks s***, doesn’t mean she won’t get caught!)

Related:
Es-pwñ-ol, Part 2
Es-pwñ-ol

In Desperate Need Of Some Context

| Portland, OR, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

(I’m stocking and straightening movies on the bottom shelf of a display, so I am crouched down. A man and woman walk past me holding hands, obviously not noticing me.)

Woman: “No! You can not have sex with your sister!”

How To Spot A Smoking Gun

| Shrewsbury, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal & Illegal, Family & Kids

(I manage a tobacco store and the law says we cannot sell any tobacco products to anyone under 18 and MUST card if customer looks under 30. A young girl and older woman enter store and at the door the young girl hands cash to older woman. Right away I know that she is underage and older woman is buying for her which is illegal. I know I cannot sell at this point but let them come in to see how it goes down.)

Me: “Hello, how are you? What can I get for you today?”

(Both stand there staring intently at the cigarette display without speaking. After a solid minute I ask the older woman:)

Me: “What brand do you normally smoke?”

(She turns to young girl and says:)

Woman: “Well? What do you smoke?”

(I immediately address the young girl and ask for I.D.)

Woman: *very rudely* “I’m buying them, not her!”

(I state that now I know she is buying for a minor I legally cannot sell either one cigarettes.)

Girl: *starts screaming at woman* “Grandma! WHY DID YOU ASK ME THAT? Now I can’t get my smokes!”

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