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Category: Family & Kids

Gunning For A Date

| CA, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

(I am female and have a love for outdoor activities. It is a few days away from Mother’s Day. I am walking a couple to their table and am chatting with them.)

Me: “So, do you have any fun plans for the weekend?”

Husband: “Yeah, I will be taking my wife fishing for her Mother’s Day present.”

Me: *excitedly* “Oh, really? That’s so cool!”

(The wife starts shaking her head.)

Husband: “Oh, I was just kidding. She doesn’t fish.”

Me: “Oh, well. you never know. For example, there may be women like me. If I had a significant other want to take me hunting for Mother’s Day, I would totally want to go. I figured that was the case.”

Husband: “You know, I have a son who is single and he LOVES to go hunting and shooting.”

Wife: “No, he doesn’t. What are you talking about?”

Husband: “No, he loves hunting.”

Wife: “He doesn’t even like guns!”

Husband: “Well, he will!”

Me: “…”

Giving Them A Minor Earful

| IL, USA | Family & Kids, Health & Body

(I work in an alternative store that sells body jewelry and such. My earlobes are stretched to about the size of a nickel. A woman and her daughter come in to the store.)

Daughter: “Mom, I want to stretch my earlobes like that girl.”

Mom: “Absolutely not! Those look disgusting. You’re not ruining your body like her.”

Me: *standing five feet away* “Well, one pro to ear stretching is that it does not affect your hearing at all… Just so you know.”

Mom: *to daughter* “Well, maybe you can have really small ones.”

Giving That Request The Boot

| USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I manage a retail clothing store and I am at the counter when a mother and daughter walk up with a pair of our boots in the box to return.)

Me: “Hi, ladies, what can I help you with?”

Daughter: “Yes, I talked to the other manager, [My Assistant], yesterday about the studs coming off my boots. She said I could re-order them.”

Me: “Absolutely! I am sorry they are falling apart.”

(I try and see if the boot can be ordered, since the boots launched some time ago.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but the boots are unavailable for re-order. I would be more than happy to return them for you or you can swap it for whatever you like.”

Mother: “But she wants the boots. Can’t you give us something since they can’t be ordered?”

Me: “Ma’am, that’s exactly what I am trying to do. I am more than willing to return them or exchange them for whatever your daughter would like.”

Mother: “But she wants the boots. You can’t give us anything?”

Me: “So let me get this correct: you would like me to give you something for free AND let you keep the boots?”

Daughter: *getting frustrated with the audacity of her mother asking for such a ridiculous request* “No, it’s okay… I’ll keep the boots.” *mumbles to her mother* “Let’s go, mom.”