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Category: Family & Kids

Questionable Behavior

| Pullman, WA, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Pets & Animals, School

(While I am a student I work as a tour guide for prospective students.)

Me: “Now if you have any questions. Feel free to ask me anything that doesn’t violate my fifth amendment rights!”

(A good portion of the groups laugh as expected. The tour continues with me answering the occasional question. A mother of a high-school girl has one.)

Mother: “What are your enrollment numbers?”

Me: “Our undergrad enrollment is [number]. If you count grad students it goes up to [higher number].”

Mother: “Thank you.”

(Several minutes later, this same mother asks another questions.)

Mother: “Where are the dining halls and how many options do they serve?”

Me: “Well, ma’am…”

(I proceed to give her every piece of info I can about meal plans, the dining locations, and even the specific food items. Several more minutes into the tour…)

Mother: “I heard that last year you had a swine flu epidemic and had to shut down the school!”

(At this point I wonder if she is clueless or deliberately trying to get a question I can’t answer.)

Me: “Actually, several students were diagnosed but nowhere near an epidemic.”

Mother: “How do you know? I heard they had to cancel two football games here!”

Me: “Ma’am, I go to every home football game. If they really did cancel a football game then I have no idea what I was watching.”

(Some of the other parents are trying to contain their laughter, and even this woman’s daughter looks embarrassed at her mom)

Mother: “Fine.” *looks around and then points* “WHAT KIND OF BIRD IS THAT!?”

(The rest of the group as this point cannot believe this is happening.)

Me: “If we look at that bird, we can clearly see that’s a magpie, which my friend pointed out to me last week. Now moving on…”

(At this point the mother pulls out a phone as we continue and about two minutes later I hear the daughter.)

Daughter: “See? It was a magpie! Now, will you please stop!?”

This Is Spyro-ing Out Of Control

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Technology

(I am flicking through some pre-owned games, minding my own business when a late 20s age looking woman speaks to me:)

Customer: “Do you know where the Skylanders discs are?”

(As much as I would like to work there, I don’t work there. I don’t have a uniform or anything that says I work there. I was most likely in a shirt with a game reference on it.)

Me: “What, Skylanders discs? I don’t know what you are talking about.”

Customer: “You’re a boy. You should know what they are. My little [Son] wants me to get him some characters for his game.”

Me: “Um, Skylanders characters aren’t discs but toy figures, and I don’t work here.”

Customer: “You are lying. Prove that Skylanders are toys.”

(I take this woman over to the ‘Skylanders’ toys and give a random one to her.)

Customer: “This is just a toy, not a disc.”

Me: “Okay, you must have seen your son play the game. These are what you put on a pad thing to play the character.”

Customer: “But then how do you explain how the game saves then?”

Me: “Have you ever used wireless internet?”

Customer: “Yes, why?”

Me: “It is like that on a small scale, and only works with the toys. Now are you going buy one of the toys?”

(The customer’s eyes shoot open.)

Customer: “I don’t remember what ones he wanted.”

This Customer Is Phoney

| Leeds, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers, Technology

(It’s the early 2000s, and my dad and I are at my grandma’s house. We see a salesman making his way around the street, and my dad says he’ll deal with him when he gets to us.)

Salesman: “Hello, sir! I’d just like to talk to you about your telephone service.”

Dad: “Sorry, I don’t believe in phones.”

Salesman: “You… don’t believe in phones?”

Dad: “No, I don’t. I don’t think they’ll ever catch on.”

(At this point, I’m not sure if the salesman is playing along or genuinely believes him.)

Salesman: “Oh, but sir! Telephones are very popular now! Everybody uses them! Some people even have small ones they can carry around with them!”

Dad: “That sounds ridiculous! Nope. Sorry, I’m not interested. Goodbye!”

(He then returned inside, and picked up one of his three mobile phones to send a text message.)