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Category: Family & Kids

This Is Spyro-ing Out Of Control

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Technology

(I am flicking through some pre-owned games, minding my own business when a late 20s age looking woman speaks to me:)

Customer: “Do you know where the Skylanders discs are?”

(As much as I would like to work there, I don’t work there. I don’t have a uniform or anything that says I work there. I was most likely in a shirt with a game reference on it.)

Me: “What, Skylanders discs? I don’t know what you are talking about.”

Customer: “You’re a boy. You should know what they are. My little [Son] wants me to get him some characters for his game.”

Me: “Um, Skylanders characters aren’t discs but toy figures, and I don’t work here.”

Customer: “You are lying. Prove that Skylanders are toys.”

(I take this woman over to the ‘Skylanders’ toys and give a random one to her.)

Customer: “This is just a toy, not a disc.”

Me: “Okay, you must have seen your son play the game. These are what you put on a pad thing to play the character.”

Customer: “But then how do you explain how the game saves then?”

Me: “Have you ever used wireless internet?”

Customer: “Yes, why?”

Me: “It is like that on a small scale, and only works with the toys. Now are you going buy one of the toys?”

(The customer’s eyes shoot open.)

Customer: “I don’t remember what ones he wanted.”

This Customer Is Phoney

| Leeds, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers, Technology

(It’s the early 2000s, and my dad and I are at my grandma’s house. We see a salesman making his way around the street, and my dad says he’ll deal with him when he gets to us.)

Salesman: “Hello, sir! I’d just like to talk to you about your telephone service.”

Dad: “Sorry, I don’t believe in phones.”

Salesman: “You… don’t believe in phones?”

Dad: “No, I don’t. I don’t think they’ll ever catch on.”

(At this point, I’m not sure if the salesman is playing along or genuinely believes him.)

Salesman: “Oh, but sir! Telephones are very popular now! Everybody uses them! Some people even have small ones they can carry around with them!”

Dad: “That sounds ridiculous! Nope. Sorry, I’m not interested. Goodbye!”

(He then returned inside, and picked up one of his three mobile phones to send a text message.)

He’s Just Been KO’d

| Dearborn, MI, USA | Family & Kids, Technology, Underaged, Wild & Unruly

(I’m shopping at my local major games retailer, where the staff and I have an excellent relationship. I am finishing up my transaction when I hear a 12ish-year-old boy convincing his mother to buy him ‘Call of Duty: Ghosts.’)

Kid: “But Mom, all my friends are playing it! They’re already making fun of me because it took me so long to get a PS4!”

Mom: “Okay, okay… and you’re sure this isn’t a bloody or inappropriate game? I don’t like the look of the soldier on the front. I don’t want you playing anything like that Grand Theft whatever game.”

Kid: “Oh, my god, Mom. I’m not a little baby anymore! Just get me the d*** game!”

(Seeing the looks of apprehension and dread on the faces of the two guys behind the counter, as they now have the unhappy task of explaining to the mother of this brat why she shouldn’t buy it, I step in.)

Me: “Miss, you should know that game is horribly violent and gory. It depicts lots of blood, war scenes, even an enhanced interrogation scene where you slowly kill a man for information. It’s something you’ll want to consider before buying it for your son.”

Mom: “Oh, my gosh! [Kid], is this true?!”

Kid: “No, Mom. He’s lying! He’s just some random fat guy!”

(At this little insult, I decide to really ruin the kids day.)

Me: “Ma’am, are you familiar with the MPAA’s movie rating system? Like how they rate movies based on their content? Well there’s a similar body called the ESRB, and they rate all major video game releases for their content.”

(I show her their emblem on the back along with the description for their rating.)

Me: “They even have a website where you can look up more specific details on each game. It’s a good way to research them.”

Mom: “Oh, wow… Thank you so much. Can I trouble you to recommend a game for him?”

(At this point, the kid is jumping up and down in frustration, making a scene, yelling at his mother, and calling me a liar. We choose a game and the mom questions the staff.)

Mom: “I’m in here all the time. Why have you never told me about this rating system?! That’s pretty irresponsible not to inform the parents.”

Employee #1: “Honestly, ma’am, we didn’t know you were buying it for a kid. We would’ve mentioned it if we knew.”

Mom: “Of course I bought it for my child! Honestly, what sort of adult plays these stupid games?”

Employee #2: “Me, my associate, the gentleman who helped you, and everyone who works at this store, to name a few.”

(The mom goes red and pays for the game.)

Mom: *on their way out* “When we get home, young man, I’m looking up all your games on this ESRB thing!”

Kid: “NO! DON’T LISTEN TO HIM! HE’S JUST A F****** FAT A**!”