Category: Underaged

Everyone at one time has tried to sneak into a movie or bought a drink they’re too young for. However; when stupid customers make this attempt the results can be both hilarious and pitying. And this is before alcohol has destroyed their brain cell(s)!

Has No License To Be Right

| FL, USA | At The Checkout, Underaged

(I work at a local grocery and pharmacy store in my neighborhood in the customer service department. I deal with checks, returns, and things of that nature. A lady walks up to me looking to cash a check.)

Me: “So, you’d like to cash a check for $76? May I see your ID, please?”

Customer: “Absolutely! Here you go.” *I inspect the ID, which expired over seven years ago*

Me: “Miss, I can’t take this ID. It expired on [this date] in ’07. As such, that makes it invalid.”

Customer: “Are you kidding me? This is ridiculous! I cash checks at your sister store down the road all the time with this ID!”

Me: *trying to be as nice as possible* “Well, I can tell you they shouldn’t be doing that either. It’s illegal for me to cash this check with an invalid license. Do you have a valid ID?”

Customer: *searching through her wallet for a newer, legal license* “Here. You need to learn to respect your elders and let the customer be right.”

(I’m 20 and while that is true, I’m not going to break any laws.)

Me: “And while we’re at it, may I ask why you carry around that expired license?”

Customer: “Well, in case I lose my new one, of course!”

(She takes her money and storms out. I turn to a coworker who watched the whole thing.)

Me: “I hope she doesn’t get pulled over and present that. She wouldn’t have a good excuse.”

Rated ‘R You Serious?’

| Ashland, KY, USA | Movies & TV, Underaged

Customer: “I want two tickets to [Movie].”

Me: “The movie is rated R. May I ask how old you are?”

Customer: “17.”

Me: “May I see your ID, please?”

Customer: “Sure!”

(I was happy to get someone not fighting me for once, but then…)

Me: “Umm… no offense but your ID says you’re 15.”

Customer: “Oh, they just printed it wrong.”

Me: “I am sorry but I have to go by the year on the ID and according to this you are 14.”

Customer: “Just sell me the ticket.”

Me: “I am sorry; I can’t. You can pick out another—”

(The customer huffs off. Five minutes later:)

Customer #2: “I need THREE tickets for [R-rated Movie].”

(The customer is slightly older but I see the first person over behind a pole and peeking around.)

Me: “The move is rated R. May I ask how old everyone is?”

Customer #2: “Well I am 19 and she is 18. And I am not sure how old the other person is.”

Me: “May see all the IDs, please?”

(The customer gives me both his and other girl’s ID and they are the right age.)

Me: “May I see the last ID?”

Customer #2: “He didn’t give it to me, but he is right behind that pole. Let me get him really quick.”

(Customer #2 then tries to go over to Customer #1, who promptly runs off.)

Customer #2: “Weird… He gave the money and everything.”

Should Have Called It A Night

| Scotland, UK | Hotels & Lodging, Rude & Risque, Underaged

(I’m 14, working in the kitchen of a local pub/inn. I arrive at work one day and go to sign in, behind the reception desk in the front hall. A customer comes in and assumes I’m working on the front desk.)

Customer: “Hey! How much are rooms?”

Me: “Depending on which rooms are available, anywhere from £35-65 a night—”

Customer: “No, how much for an hour?”

(He winks at me. Being 14, I don’t understand what he’s getting at.)

Me: “Pardon? The rooms are priced for a night—”

Customer: “Yeah, but how much for you and a room for an hour?”

(I am beyond confused at this point when the manager, a stocky guy with a shaved head, tattooed arms and a strong Glaswegian accent appears from the dining room, right behind the guy.)

Manager: “CAN I HELP YOU!?”

(The customer jumped about a foot in the air, saw my manager, and bolted out the door. My manager refused to tell me what the guy was talking about (and I didn’t realise for another couple of years), just told me to run and get him or the chef if I saw the guy again.)