Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Ice Cold Demands

| USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(My sandwich shop is located in a fairly affluent area of my city, between a well-known coffee shop and a smoothie shop, with whom we are on good terms. On this day, the ice machine has broken. A repairman is scheduled to fix it later in the day, but in the meantime my boss has instructed me to tell all customers about the lack of ice before selling them a drink. So far, none of them have had a problem. I’m serving a woman in her 40s during the middle of an extremely busy lunch rush.)

Me: “Would you like anything else with your sandwich today, ma’am?”

Customer: “Just a large soda, please.”

Me: “Sure thing! Just to let you know, our ice machine is currently not working, but the drinks are still cold. Will that be all right?”

Customer: *looking scandalized* “Excuse me? How am I supposed to get ice, then?”

Me: “Oh, well, some people have gone next door to [Coffee Shop] to get ice. They won’t mind giving you some.”

Customer: “Oh, all right, then.”

Me: “Great! Your total is [price].”

(She pays and then stares at me for several seconds. I smile uncertainly at her.)

Customer: “Well? Where is my ice?”

Me: “Um, you can just take it next door to [Coffee Shop] and—”

Customer: *looking as insulted as can be* “What?! You want me to go all the way over there and get it myself? Are you SERIOUS?” *looks to other customers for validation* “I mean, you call this customer service? YOU run out of ice and expect ME to pay the same price for a drink AND go find my own ice? I mean, honestly!”

(Startled, I look to my manager, who is as shocked by this outburst as I am. He looks at the 15 people still in line, then shrugs and nods, moving forward to take over my register. I grab the woman’s cup and run next door to the coffee shop. The barista fills the cup to the top with ice, and I run it back to the customer, who snatches it out of my hand.)

Customer: “THANK you. Was that so hard?”

(She marched to the soda fountain, dumped out all but two or three ice cubes, and filled her drink to the top.)

Doesn’t Understand The ‘Customer’ Part Of Customer Service

| UK | Books & Reading, Crazy Requests

Me: “Hello, [Store]. This is [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, so I purchased a print of [artwork] from your website and the quality isn’t very good because of the size. I want to return it.”

Me: “I’m sorry you’re not happy with your print. As you may have noticed when you made your purchase, although we offer prints on our website they are all custom orders made and shipped by [Different Company]. We simply supply the copyright for the image. You will need to contact the returns department for [Different Company].”

Caller: “Yeah, I know they’re made by [Different Company]. I’ve called them just about every day this week to make the return. The woman in the call centre said she’s waiting to hear back from the head of the department, and they still haven’t gotten back to me yet!”

Me: “I’m very sorry to hear about that, sir. Hopefully they will get back to you soon. Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Caller: “Um, yeah! This return! I want to return it; it’s no good.”

Me: “Sir, as we just discussed, [Bookstore] does not make the prints; [Different Company] does. They will process your return.”

Caller: “But it’s on your website!”

Me: “Yes, but we contract [Different Company] to fulfill the custom orders. We at [Bookstore] cannot refund something that we do not make, stock, or ship.”

Caller: *nearly screaming* “But [Different Company]’s customer service is terrible! What are you going to do about it?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I have no control over the customer service of another company.”

Caller: *now yelling* “You should care about how other companies treat your customers! YOU promoted [Different Company]. YOU should make them have better customer service! Now I want my return!”

Me: *finally fed up* “Sir, I don’t know how else I can explain this. [Bookstore] does not make the prints. [Different Company] does. They shipped your order to you, not us, and you must return it back to them. We have over 1200 products in our store from hundreds of different companies, and if you purchased any of them IN OUR STORE, and not a customer order from a third party, you could return them here. But you cannot return something that we have never had!”

Caller: “You should still care more about how other companies treat your customers!” *hangs up*

Won’t Accept The Heavy Responsibility

| UK | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests

(I work in a retail establishment where the government has enforced a carrier bag charge at a very low price, just to help you remember about your bags. It has been in place for a year already.)

Customer: “Just put all the stuff in the same bag there.”

Me: “Are you sure? It’s quite a lot of stuff; not sure the bag will hold.”

Customer: “It’ll be okay; I’m not paying any more.”

Me: “Are you sure you don’t want another bag? It seems about ready to burst.”

Customer: “Stop trying to sell me bags I don’t need!”

(After using some great Tetris skills I finished packing and I hand the bag over while holding the bottom of the bag.)

Me: “Now be careful while lifting it; it’s very heavy and about ready to burst.”

(The bag broke as soon as it was lifted. Customer went on a rant about how I should’ve warned him that the bag was heavy, and that I should’ve known better than to pack it that heavy, and stormed off leaving all his stuff behind him.)

On The Straight And Narrow (Minded), Part 4

| OR, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I am female. I work at a pool as a lifeguard/swimming instructor/supervisor for a few summers. The town is extremely conservative, and I am dating another woman.)

Me: *picks up phone* “Hello, this is [Pool]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I’ve heard there’s a [lesbian slur] working at your pool. How can you let her around the children?”

Me: “Ma’am, our employees personal lives are not our business.”

Customer: “Well, I want her fired. It’s inappropriate.”

Me: “You do realize it’s illegal to fire someone based on their sexuality in this state, right?”

Customer: “I don’t f****** care. I don’t want her around my daughter! She’ll fill her head with horrible ideas and make her a sinner!”

(By now, my boss has noticed that I’m about to cry, so she picks the phone up and tells me to hang up. I only hear my boss talking. Note: My boss is a 50-year-old mother of two that comes off as quiet, and I’ve never heard her curse before.)

Boss: “Ma’am, that’s not how we operate here.” *pause* “Well, f*** you, too. All of our employees are valuable members of the team, and I’d rather lose you as a customer than her as a family member. You are no longer welcome here.”


On The Straight And Narrow (Minded), Part 3

On The Straight And Narrow (Minded), Part 2

On The Straight And Narrow (Minded)


Saved From A Long Hairy Situation

| UK | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I am a male, with very long hair, and am admittedly slightly feminine looking. A woman and her young daughter come up to the counter.)

Woman: “All right, sweetie, give the nice man the money.”

Little Girl: *confused* “But mommy, it’s a girl!”

Woman: *clearly embarrassed* “No, sweetie, it’s a boy; he just has long hair.”

Little Girl: *becoming distraught* “NO! It’s a GIRL! GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!”

(The child begins to bawl loudly, still screaming the word ‘girl’ over and over again while the mother continues to try and correct her.)

Me: *in defeat* “It’s okay… I’ll be a girl.”

(The little girl calmed down and they finally finished the transaction!)

Page 81/330First...7980818283...Last