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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Wish You Could Part Ways

| VA, USA | Crazy Requests, Transportation

Customer: *after complaining how dealers and garages are all out to take your money and burn you* “So you are telling me you cannot fix my car?”

Mechanic: “We can fix your car; we just do not have the parts.”

Customer: “Why do you not have the parts? It is a standard part!”

Mechanic: “We do not carry parts for your vehicle. Your car is [X brand]. We are a [Y dealership] and garage. Our parts are not for your vehicle.”

Customer: “But you are a garage!”

Mechanic: “Yes for [Y vehicles], so we stock only [Y vehicle] parts.”

Customer: “So you do not have my part?”

Mechanic: “No, but we can get it.”

Customer: “If you can get it, why do you not stock it?”

Mechanic: “Because are a [Y dealership] garage. Your car is an [X brand]. If you want the parts to be in stock you need to go to an [X dealership] garage.”

Customer: “But you can get the parts so you should stock them!”

Mechanic: “Look, when the [X dealership] garage opens and the parts stores open, we will make a few calls, find the part, and send a driver out to get it.”

Customer: “If you can get the parts you should stock them!”

Mechanic: “We do not stock parts for cars that are not [Y cars]. We are not a parts store or an [X vehicle] dealer.”

Customer: “So I guess you are going to screw me over and make me wait until other stores open so you can get a part you should have in stock.”

Mechanic: “As soon as we can we will get to work or you can take your car to an [X dealer].”

Customer: “Fix it. OH, and I have a coupon.”

Mechanic: “We cannot accept it.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Mechanic: “Because it is for [Y vehicles] only. See it says right here. “Valid for [Y vehicles].”

Customer: “So you will not stock my parts and you will not accept a coupon!”

Mechanic: “…”

Customer: “So can you fix my car?”

Mechanic: “As soon as we get the part here which may be an hour or two.”

Customer: “You really need to keep my parts in stock!”

Mechanic: “Sir, we are not a… Forget it. Just have a seat; you will be called when it is ready.”

Suffering From Bad Graphics

| Conway, AR, USA | Crazy Requests, Technology

Client: “I need a logo designed for a girl’s camp and would like it to be on fire with a dragon blowing the logo out of his mouth.”

Me: “Okay, well, let’s start with the logo and get it designed, then work on the dragon after a logo has been picked. What colors would you like?”

Client: “I don’t know. I will get back to you on that.”

Me: “Okay. I will start some samples and wait on you to tell me what colors you want before I send you any samples.”

Client: “Okay, thanks.”

(Three hours later:)

Client: “Where are my logos? If you don’t have anything ready I will go in another direction.”

Me: “Did you decide on your colors?”

Client: “No.”

Me: “Well, I can not send you a logo to select from if you have not decided on colors, unless you want them in black and white?”

Client: “No, I want them in purple and orange!”

Me: “Ok, I will add those colors and send you five selections of what you described you wanted.”

Client: “Okay.”

(Ten minutes after sending samples:)

Client: “What is this? I want a true designer not clip art pictures! I’m using someone else!”

Me: “Sorry if I misinterpreted what we discussed. What were you expecting?”

Client: “Not fake font and fake flames! I want the real thing, like a photograph, DUH!”

Me: “Sorry… I am not a photographer. Everything I do is drawn on the computer.”

Client: “YES, I KNOW! So draw a photograph of what I want!”

Me: “Sir, I am not drawing you a photograph I agreed to do a logo for $120, not a photograph. If you want a photograph drawn that will be charged by the hour and will take a few days.”

Client: “You are dismissed! I would like to formally fire you. Let me talk to your boss so they will fire you!”

Me: “I own this company so I am the boss.”

Client: “Then you BETTER give me what you promised for what I paid!”

Me: “Sir, you never paid anything. We don’t accept payment until the job is complete.”

Client: “This is ridiculous! I’m going another direction!”

Her Relaxing Is Taxing

| Allentown, PA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Musical Mayhem

(I work in a fair trade store. Like most stores, we play music over speakers throughout the day.)

Customer: “It’s too loud!”

Manager: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Your music! It’s too loud!”

Manager: “No one else seems to think so; it’s certainly not as loud as they play in several of the other stores here. I’m friends with the manager at [Makeup Store] and their music is much louder.”

Customer: “That’s different! You’re not a REAL store!”

Manager: “…What?”

Customer: “You’re not a retail store! You’re fair trade! You’re a non-profit! You shouldn’t be acting like a real store!”

Manager: “Ma’am, we are a retail store. Our company is non-profit, that’s true, but retail stores is how we fulfill our mission.”

Customer: “You’re different! I come in here to relax, and I don’t expect it to be like other stores!”

Manager: “I’m sorry you feel that way. Is there something special I can help you find today?”

Customer: “What? No! I never spend money in here. I just walk around to relax!”