Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!


Needs A Key To The Real World

| Chicago, IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

Customer: “I need you to make a copy of my car key. It barely works at all and I need a new one that works perfectly.”

Me: “You do know that we make a copy of your key? The new key will work just as well or poorly as the key you give to me.”

Customer: “No, it will be a new key so it will work just as well as my key did when it was new.”

Me: “That would be true if you were bringing in your key when it was new. However I can see that your key now is very worn and we copy what you give us.”

Customer: “No, I want it made better. Is that so hard?”

Me: “Okay, let’s assume that instead of a key you were copying a document that had several misspelled words on a copier. Do you think that the copier would correct the spelling of the words on your new copies?”

Customer: “Well, it should!”

Me: “Here we learn the difference between ‘Should’ and ‘Reality.’ And I am sorry to say that reality is all we have here. So I am going to have to turn you down for making you a key.”


Her Items Cannot Be Fabricated

| AR, USA | Crazy Requests, Home Improvement, Popular

(A woman was looking very disoriented in the crafting aisle, and so I went to approach her.)

Customer: “Do you have paint for a sign? I need a bucket.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we don’t carry paint in buckets. We have fabric glue, but not a bucket of it.”

Customer: “Oh.” *holds up her hands to approximate a huge sign* “I need paint for a sign this big.”

Me: “I’m afraid that we don’t carry paint for signs, ma’am. Any paint that we have in stock is intended for fabrics and is in small bottles. We are a crafts store, but we specialize in fabric.”

Customer: “That’s okay! I’ll just buy your paint and then a paintbrush, please.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m afraid that we don’t carry paintbrushes either. We are a crafts store, but we specialize in fabric. Have you tried going across the street to [Department Store]?”

(At this point the woman drops what she is carrying as if I offended her terribly.)

Customer: “No, I came HERE for crafts. Are you telling me that this fabric store can’t have someone go across the street and special order those paintbrushes here for me right now!?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am…”


Me: “One that specializes in fabric, ma’am.”


Very Family Unfriendly

, | AB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I’m a hostess at a restaurant that is comprised of a dining room on one side and a lounge/bar on the other. Children, for obvious reasons, are not permitted on the bar side. On this evening we are packed, which is not unusual for a Friday night. A female customer approaches me at the front desk.)

Customer: “How long is the wait for the dining room?”

Me: “Good evening. Right now we are looking at a forty-five minute wait for the dining room. Would you like me to put your name down?”

Customer: “Forty-five minutes! That’s pretty s***ty! What about the bar?”

Me: “The bar does have availability. Is everyone in your party over eighteen?”

Customer: “No, I have two little kids that are d*** near starving!”

Me: “I apologize, but minors are not permitted in the bar side.”

Customer: *shouts* “Oh, you just hate children, then!”

Me: *stunned silence*

(The family left, the mother swearing and cursing our “children hating” policies.)


Not Their Number One (O’clock) Customer

| Frisco, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Popular, Time

(I am a receptionist for a fairly busy salon. I get a phone call about booking an appointment.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Salon]. May I schedule a signature service for you?”

Guest: “I need an appointment for my daughter for tomorrow. I want hair and make-up done and you have to see us at exactly one o’clock.”

Me: “Well, for tomorrow I do have an opening a 1:15 or 1:30. One is cutting it close since there is a client before you.”

Guest: “Well, it’s one or nothing because I have to be out of here by five.”

(I check the times for what she wants and even if she came in at three, I could get her out well before five. Reluctantly I agree to a booking at one, again reminding her of the guest ahead of them. The next day, at about 12:50 the guest, her daughter, who is about 17, and the girl’s grandmother all arrive.)

Me: “Hi, you’re a little early, but I can get you changed into a smock now while she finishes up with the other guest.”

Guest: “That is unacceptable! We had an appointment at one! We need to be seen now!”

Me: “You will be seen. I’m just saying that she is finishing up with another guest.”

(I go back and check with my stylist. She says that she’ll only be about five more minutes, meaning she can still see them before their appointment starts. I relay this to the guest, and the grandmother starts swearing under her breath. When I go to take the guest back, the mother is on her phone, and the girl is having a meltdown.)

Girl: “Why do I have to wait?” *she’s stamping her feet and carrying on*

(By the time I can get the guest off her phone long enough to listen to me, it is 1:12.)

Guest: *hanging up her phone* “This is the worst salon! We are leaving! Good luck finding someone else! You’ll be out of business in a week!”

(My stylist and I both went on break after that.)


First Class A**-Hole With First World Problems

| USA | Crazy Requests

(I work for a very exclusive fashion house, and many of our customers like to frequent an online forum about luxury handbags. These are hands down the WORST clients because they think that everything they read or see on the attached YouTube videos is absolute truth.)

Me: “Good afternoon. Welcome to [Store]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “I have a problem. You did not give me the right storage box for my bag. You also did not give me the right felt. It’s flat, and all crunched up in the box.”

(She pulls out one of our signature pieces, which is known for its ability to fold flat.)

Me: “Oh, you have the [Bag]! It’s one of our classic pieces, and it’s folded the way it was designed to be stored. The felt that you received is the same one that came with the piece when it arrived from the workshop, and the box we wrapped it in was specifically designed to hold this bag while it’s folded.”

Customer: “That is a bald-faced lie. I went on [Online Forum], and asked everyone. They said it should come fully stuffed with bubble wrap, and in a box twice this size. I’ve also been watching YouTube videos of people’s bag reveals, and theirs look totally different.”

Me: “Okay, well, we have very specific company guidelines on how to wrap these pieces, but I can wrap it differently if you prefer.”

Customer: “I want you to wrap it the way they did on YouTube. And I want an apology for having to drive all the way out here.”

Me: “Okay, I’m sorry. I’ll re-wrap.”

(I take her bag in the back, pull some bubble wrap from the recycle bin, and stuff it, and put it in another box. I take it out…)

Customer: “That’s not the box from the video.”

Me: “Well, this is what I have that will fit.”

Customer: *opens box… now REALLY annoyed* “And it’s not the right felt! What kind of service is this?”

Me: “Why don’t you show me the video?”

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to do that. You should be smart enough to know what you’re doing.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m not sure what you’re asking me to do. If you showed me—”

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to tell you how to do your job!”

Me: “Ma’am, people post a lot of things online. They don’t always use the same felts and boxes that we might here in the store to post their pictures. They stage things.”

Customer: “Oh, so, it might not even be real? Why would they post if it wasn’t real?”

Me: “I don’t know. Without knowing what you saw, I can’t tell. I can only wrap it the way that I know or how you just described.”

Customer: “Oh, okay. You can just wrap it up like it was before, then. I’ll just take it the way it was.”

Me: *sighs, walks in the back to wrap it again*

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