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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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Restate The Rebate

| MA, USA | Crazy Requests, Money

Customer: “Excuse me? What does this mean when it says ’4.99 after easy rebate’?”

Me: “It means that you pay the full price of $7.99 at the register, and then you go online and fill out a rebate, and you’ll receive a check for $3.”

Customer: “So, I have to mail something in?”

Me: “Nope! [Store] made it so you can do everything online without having to mail anything in. The website tells you exactly where to find the information you need on your receipt and it only takes about five minutes to fill out.”

Customer: “Well, what if I don’t do online?”

Me: “Then you can still mail it in. That is always an option.”

Customer: “You just said I don’t have to mail it!”

Me: “Correct. You don’t have to mail it because there is an option of doing it online. But if you don’t want to do it that way, then you can mail it.”

Customer: “This is false advertising! The sign says 4.99 but I have to pay 7.99. AND I have to mail it in even though you said I don’t!”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s not false advertising. It says very clearly on the sign that this price is after a rebate. And you don’t have to mail it in unless you are unable to do it online.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t like rebates. If [Store] wants to have a sale, they should just give me the money off right away!”

(After explaining why that’s not how it works and if she wants the sale price she needs to do the rebate, she finally picks up the paper and goes to the register, where the cashier gives her a total of $8.49…)

Customer: *screaming, and pointing at me* “BUT THAT GIRL JUST TOLD ME IT’S $4.99!”

Me: “Ma’am, I explained to you that you need to pay $7.99 today and then do the $3 rebate.”

Customer: “But she is trying to charge me $8.49! THIS IS FALSE ADVERTISING!”

Me: “There is sales tax which is bringing it to $8.49.”

Customer: “It doesn’t say anything about sales tax on the sign. FALSE ADVERTISING!”

Me: “Ma’am, you are in Massachusetts. There is sales tax on everything but food and clothing, and it is never included in the price on the sign. It is ALWAYS added at the register.”

Customer: “But it isn’t on the sign! And there isn’t always sales tax. Sometimes it’s tax free weekend. And I could just go to New Hampshire and not pay tax!”

Me: “Correct. There is one weekend a year where there is no sales tax in MA, but it’s not this weekend. And you could go to NH, but I think you would spend more money in gas to get there then you would save by not paying tax today.”

Customer: “Well, maybe I’ll wait until tax free weekend to get this then!”

Me: “You could do that, but it probably won’t be on sale by then.”

Customer: “It’s NOT on sale! It’s a rebate!”

Me: “The rebate is a limited time offer. We probably won’t be offering it on tax free weekend.”

Customer: “Fine! I’ll just get it today and pay the tax! But I still think this is false advertising! Between the rebate and the tax I am paying much more than what the sign says! I should report you!”

Me: “If you feel like you need to report us for false advertising, feel free to do that. I am sure they will explain exactly what I did and tell you that this is not false advertising. Have a nice day!”

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Not Understanding The Value Of The Dollar

| San Diego, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money, Popular

(I work at a local dollar store where everything is a dollar or less. A customer, around 18, comes up to the register with a couple items and a VISA gift card that can have $1-$100 put on it. She tells me she would like $50 on it so I ring her up.)

Me: “Your total will be $59.”

Customer: “No, that’s not right I only have eight items and this is the dollar store.”

Me: “Yes, but you put $50 on this gift card.”

Customer: “But this is the dollar store; I should be able to put how ever much I want on that and only pay a dollar.”

Me: “I don’t think it works like that…”

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This Customer Has A Latte Problems, Part 2

| Orlando, FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I sell and prepare often pricey coffee from another well known company. We sell baked goods as well, including sandwiches.)

Me: “How can I help you today?”

Customer: “Do you have any turkey sandwiches?”

Me: *looking at the case, it features ham, sausage, bacon, and a vegetarian option as well* “Sorry, those are the only options we have available. Will one of them be okay?”

Customer: “I guess but can you customize the sandwich for me at least. I don’t like croissants.”

Me: “Unfortunately the sandwiches are prepackaged so we can’t do that but we can remove anything that you like from any one that you choose.”

Customer: “Fine, the bacon gouda with no bacon and no cheese. And a cappuccino as well.”

(After the order is paid for and received they come back.)

Customer: “My sandwich was fine but there is no milk in my cappuccino. It’s all foam.”

Me: “Cappuccinos are mostly foam and only half milk.”

Customer: “That’s not true. It’s supposed to be the other way around.”

Me: “Then you want a latte.”

Customer: “NO! It’s a cappuccino!”

(This back and forth went on for a bit, so in the end I made a latte with the code of a cappuccino and the customer walked away happy in their ignorance.)

Related:
This Customer Has A Latte Problems

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Wish You Could Vet The Customers, Part 2

, | Argentina | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals, Popular

(I am at a pet shop that has as a veterinary clinic in the back, looking for a kennel for my dog. A lady is at the counter complaining to the only employee there, so he can’t come help me, but I’m no hurry, so I wait.)

Lady: “But my dog won’t eat this food. Don’t you have [Brand #1]?”

Employee: “Sorry, ma’am, we only have this [Brand #2].”

Lady: “But he won’t eat it! Is there any way to make him eat it?”

Employee: “He might need time to get used to it.”

Lady: “But even if I give it to him, he won’t eat it!”

(This goes on for about five minutes, with the employee telling her there’s nothing to be done if the dog doesn’t want that food and the lady complaining because they don’t have the brand she always takes and asking if there’s a way to get her dog to eat the food. Finally, the lady changes tactic.)

Lady: “I want to speak with [Vet]. Maybe she’ll know a way to make him eat it.”

Employee: “Sorry, she isn’t here now, but the other doctor is in.”

(The other doctor is a tall, sixty-year-old man with a grey beard who clearly doesn’t appreciate being called from the back to attend to this issue, but he speaks to the lady nonetheless.)

Vet: “What seems to be the problem?”

Lady: “Well, you don’t have [Brand #1], but my dog doesn’t like [Brand #2] and he won’t eat it…”

(Meanwhile, the employee comes to show me the kennels and I pick one. All the time the lady keeps arguing with the vet about ways to make her dog eat the food.)

Vet: *visibly tired of her insistence* “Look, the only way to make him eat it is if you starve him until he has no more choice than to eat it.”

Lady: *she doesn’t seem very happy with this reply, but she takes the dog food to the counter to pay for it* “Are you sure you are a vet? I have never seen you here before.”

Vet: “Yes, ma’am, I have been for forty years. I just stay in the back most of the time.”

Lady: “Why?”

Vet: “Because I’m too old for this s***.”

Related:
Wish You Could Vet The Customers

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Will Get The Occasional Hack

| Scranton, PA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Technology

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Ya, my a**-hole neighbor hacked into your cable and is watching me!”

Me: “Excuse me, sir? Did you say he hacked our cable and is watching you?”

Customer: “Ya, that’s right! I heard him over there telling all his friends he hacked my cable box and can see me. I want you to put a block on him!”

Me: “I’m so sorry, sir, but I can assure you that’s not possible.”

Customer: “Yes, it is! I saw it on the news last week!”

Me: “Is it possible he knew you were listening and he is messing with you?”

Customer: “NO! You know it can happen and it happened to me! Are you stupid? I’m being watched and you don’t even care. They hacked into my cable box and they are watching me through the green light on the box. Shut his service off NOW!”

Me: “Sir, If you feel your life is in danger or you’re being talked about maybe you should call the police.”

Customer: “Ya, I’ll call the police now. I’m also going to report your company and they are going to shut you down!”

Me: “Is there anything I can help you with, sir?”

Customer: “NO!” *hangs up*

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