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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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Can No Longer Handle Your Baggage

, | AZ, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular, Technology

(I work inside a mall for an authorized retailer of a certain big company when I receive a phone call…)

Me: “How may I help you?”

Customer: “Ya, hi. Umm, I have a bag phone I’d like to activate. Can y’all do that?”

(A bag phone was an early mobile-phone that had to be carried around like a bag or a back-pack.)

Me: “Well, uhh, how old is the phone?”

Customer: “I bought it brand new in 1996! Best phone I ever had. Been out of the world a spell and would like to get my phone hooked back up.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but your phone is not compatible with our network anymore. If you’d like we can get you set up with a new phone that is compatible.”

Customer: “WHAT THE H*** GOOD IS IT TO BUY A NEW PHONE?! I ALREADY HAVE A BAG PHONE! WHY CAN’T I USE THE PHONE I HAVE?”

Me: “Well, they’re heavy, unwieldy, and put off way more radiation than today’s phones. Also, and sir, this is the important bit, they’re not compatible anymore. Your phone uses an analog technology. We all use digital now. I’m sorry, there’s literally no way to use your bag phone.”

Customer: “Well, I’ll just call your competitor and have them do it.”

Me: “Have a nice day, sir.”

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Impossibly Free

| Canada | Crazy Requests

Caller: “I want to speak to your manager as soon as possible!! It’s very important!”

Me: “I’ll have him call you as soon as he’s free, ma’am.”

Caller: “No! I said I want him to call me as soon as POSSIBLE, not when he’s free!”

Me: “Ma’am, that IS as soon as possible.”

(The caller hung up on me. I guess it wasn’t soon enough!)

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No Crowd Allowed

| WA, USA | Crazy Requests, Movies & TV, Popular

(I’m in line to see ‘Deadpool,’ but have turned up later than expected due to traffic. At this particular cinema they post notices inside the ticket booth if a certain screening is sold out so while the man ahead of me is getting his ticket I’m leaning forward to see if the showing I’m trying to catch still has seats available.)

Customer Ahead Of Me: “Yes, four for… uh… hold on a second.” *turns to me* “Sorry, but do you think you could… you know… back off, please?”

Me: “Oh, sorry!”

(I quickly step to the other side of the ticket booth to give him some space. He in turn keeps glaring at me.)

Customer Ahead Of Me: “Well? Did you not hear me? Keep going! You’re still too close to me!”

(I’m a bit confused but duly step as far back as I can get without forcing the people behind me in line to step back as well. The man continues to glare and then steps away from the ticket booth to approach me.)

Customer Ahead Of Me: “Hey, are you deaf or something? Have some respect for a guy’s personal space! MOVE BACK! GO! SCOOT!” *he looks up as if suddenly noticing the line behind me* “That goes for all of you, too! Stop crowding me and wait your turn!”

Customer Behind Me: “We ARE waiting our turn, bud! This is where we’re supposed to wait!”

(The man throws up his hands, goes back to the ticket booth, and finishes his purchase. As he storms into the cinema I sheepishly walk up to the counter again.)

Me: “Uh… do you still have seating for Deadpool at 3:30?”

Attendant: “We do, don’t worry. Seriously I don’t know what was wrong with that guy but you weren’t standing any closer than most do when they reach the front of the line.”

Me: “Thank you, though I dread to think how he’s going to react to sitting in a theater with so many folk clustered around him…”

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Presidential Supervision Required

| Miami, FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(My supervisor is assisting me with an irate customer and now the customer wants to speak to my supervisor’s supervisor.)

Customer: “Who’s your supervisor?”

Supervisor: “Sir, I AM the supervisor. I don’t have a supervisor.”

Customer: “Who’s the president of the company?”

Me: “[President].”

Customer: *to my supervisor* “THAT’s your supervisor. Everyone has a supervisor.”

Me: *genuinely curious* “But then who’s [President]’s supervisor?”

Customer: *to me* “You’re a horse’s a**.”

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The Cake Shop Is A Lie

| IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Time

(It’s a week before our store closes. A few days ago, my manager told me not to take any more cake orders because we no longer have the supplies to properly decorate a cake. While cleaning up, the phone rings and I answer it.)

Me: “Bakery department. How may I help you?

Customer: “Hello, I’d like to put in a cake order for next Wednesday, please.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we can’t take anymore cake orders due to the store closing soon.”

Customer: “Oh… but can you have it done by next Wednesday?”

Me: “Ma’am, I just said we can’t take anymore cake orders.”

Customer: “But I need a cake for next Wednesday. Can’t you do that?”

Me: “No, because we don’t have the supplies necessary to fill an order.”

Customer: *getting agitated* “Listen, here! I need a cake by next Wednesday and you should have it ready or I’ll—”

Me: “It won’t be ready by then because the store is going to be closed by that time.”

Customer: “Well, why didn’t you say so?”

Me: *face-palm*

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