Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Adobe Photo-Flop

, | Birmingham, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Popular, Technology

(A user calls up as they do not know how to use Photoshop, despite being offered training originally.)

User: “This program is stupid. Why do I need all these buttons and functions?”

Me: “The program is a piece of professional software that is very high end, used for magazines and movie posters.”

User: “I just want to resize my dolphin photos!”

Me: “Well, first, you will need to open the photo concerned, then go to—“

User: “I haven’t got time for that! I just want these dolphin photos resized!”

Me: “You were offered training on this software when it was purchased.”

User: “I don’t have time to sit around doing training! I just want the software to do what I want it to do without clicking all of these buttons!”

Me: “I can talk you through the steps. Do you need to get a pen to write this down?”

User: “No. I am not messing around with this software any more! I have work to do! You ring Adobe and tell them I want this changed NOW.”

Me: “You want me to call Adobe and tell them to change their multi million dollar software because you don’t like it?”

User: “Yes! Let me know when they’ve done it!”

(The user hung up and I was left speechless. The user also chased it up to see if I had contacted them and if they had carried out the changes.)

Crazy Customer? Fits The Bill

| USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Politics

(I work at a bank in a small lake-side city with lots of retired older folks. While working the drive-thru I have this exchange.)

Me: “Good morning!”

Customer: “I want to exchange this for 500 dollar bills.”

(He places a stack of 20s, 50s, and 100s in the drawer.)

Me: “Sir… I’m sorry we don’t have any 500s I can exchange the smaller bills for one hundred dollar bi—“

Customer: “That’s bull-s***! I BUY 500 DOLLAR BILLS ALL THE TIME! THE BANK ORDERS THEM FOR ME!”

Me: “Sir, we can’t even order those bills; they stopped printing them back in the 1970s.”

(The customer glares at me for a few moments, grabs his money out of the drawer and points at me.)

Customer: “I know what’s going on here. You’re covering for him.”

Me: “What?”

Customer: “This is Obama’s doing!”

A Paper-Thin Reason To Be Angry

| VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I am bartending and the only front-of-house staff member on a slow Friday lunch. A notoriously very picky customer comes in, and her mother joins her later. They both order a Greek salad, without telling me they mean to share it. I drop off the food when it is up in the kitchen, and when I check back on them this happens.)

Customer: “I can’t eat this; there is PAPER in this salad!”

Me: “Oh! Oh, wow, I’m so sorry about that, ma’am. Can I replace that for you?”

Customer: “No, no, just take it away. This is terrible.”

(Then I notice — her mother had scraped half the salad onto the bottom plate. At the restaurant I work at, specialty salads are served in a dish with a flat plate underneath, and we put a cocktail napkin on the flat plate to keep it from shifting. I immediately realize what has happened.)

Me: “Ma’am, I will replace this immediately but I can explain what happened…” *and do*

Mother: “Oooh… well, then, [Customer], we’ll just wait for another. I must’ve just—“

Customer: *in extremely condescending tone* “No, just take it away. I don’t want to discuss this any more.”

(I explain to my boss, the owner, what had happened and she tells me to take the salad off their bill so I do. Later when I drop the bill off…)

Me: “And I’ve taken that salad off your check, ladies. So sorry for the mix up. I hope everything else tasted all right.”

Customer: “UGH! That really wasn’t necessary!”

(I guess some people are never satisfied…)

A Day When Everyone Is Fired

| OR, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(I work at a fast food restaurant. Right after we open I start smelling something burning. Our building is on fire, and being from a small town four fire trucks show up. The three employees are outside with the fire trucks while firefighters are spraying the building. A lady goes around all the trucks and parks cockeyed in front of the drive-thru, which it is partially blocked by a truck.)

Me: “Ma’am… did you not happen to see the fire trucks you went around?”

Customer: “Yeah… so?”

Me: “Obviously we aren’t open… We have a fire.”

Customer: *yelling* “How am I supposed to get my food?!”

Me: “I’m sorry… I can’t go into our building while it’s on fire… and it’s going to be a while before I can cook anything.”

(She took off yelling at me because she didn’t get her food.)

Doesn’t Even Have The Power To Refuse You Service

| Campbell, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(I am a cashier at a 24-hour gas station. I am working the graveyard shift. A large storm is coming through, and we have lost power. It’s about 2 am, and completely pitch black at the station. A car comes pulling in; a guy gets out, and tries to start pumping gas. He then approaches the booth.)

Customer #1: “Your gas pumps aren’t working.”

Me: “Sir, we have no power.”

Customer #1: “I need gas.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we have no power.”

Customer #1: “Just turn the pump on.” *he then flicks his credit card into the drawer and walks off*

(Normally, we have a PA system to talk to customers. But we have no power. So I just sit there until the man comes back angry now.)

Customer #1: “I told you I need gas! I gave you my credit card! Turn on the pump.”

Me: “Sir, your card is in the tray. We have no power. We can’t pump gas. We can’t even turn on the lights. You need to go somewhere else.”

Customer #1: *saying this slow and angry* “I… NEED… GAS!”

Me: “Then you need to find a gas station that has power. I cannot pump gas without electricity.”

Customer #1: “If you won’t let me pump gas, you’ve lost my business. I’m going elsewhere.”

Me: “Have a nice evening, sir.”

(The customer gets in his car and screeches away. A couple hours later the power comes back on, so we are open. A completely different customer comes up to the window.)

Customer #2: “Hi, I’d like to get a fill up. Oh, and it looks like someone left their credit card in the drawer. I don’t want you to confuse it with mine.”

(I looked, and it was the first customer’s credit card. We held it for 48 hours but he never came back for it. I guess because he couldn’t see it because it was pitch black, he forgot about it.)

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