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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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First Class A**-Hole With First World Problems

| USA | Crazy Requests

(I work for a very exclusive fashion house, and many of our customers like to frequent an online forum about luxury handbags. These are hands down the WORST clients because they think that everything they read or see on the attached YouTube videos is absolute truth.)

Me: “Good afternoon. Welcome to [Store]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “I have a problem. You did not give me the right storage box for my bag. You also did not give me the right felt. It’s flat, and all crunched up in the box.”

(She pulls out one of our signature pieces, which is known for its ability to fold flat.)

Me: “Oh, you have the [Bag]! It’s one of our classic pieces, and it’s folded the way it was designed to be stored. The felt that you received is the same one that came with the piece when it arrived from the workshop, and the box we wrapped it in was specifically designed to hold this bag while it’s folded.”

Customer: “That is a bald-faced lie. I went on [Online Forum], and asked everyone. They said it should come fully stuffed with bubble wrap, and in a box twice this size. I’ve also been watching YouTube videos of people’s bag reveals, and theirs look totally different.”

Me: “Okay, well, we have very specific company guidelines on how to wrap these pieces, but I can wrap it differently if you prefer.”

Customer: “I want you to wrap it the way they did on YouTube. And I want an apology for having to drive all the way out here.”

Me: “Okay, I’m sorry. I’ll re-wrap.”

(I take her bag in the back, pull some bubble wrap from the recycle bin, and stuff it, and put it in another box. I take it out…)

Customer: “That’s not the box from the video.”

Me: “Well, this is what I have that will fit.”

Customer: *opens box… now REALLY annoyed* “And it’s not the right felt! What kind of service is this?”

Me: “Why don’t you show me the video?”

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to do that. You should be smart enough to know what you’re doing.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m not sure what you’re asking me to do. If you showed me—”

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to tell you how to do your job!”

Me: “Ma’am, people post a lot of things online. They don’t always use the same felts and boxes that we might here in the store to post their pictures. They stage things.”

Customer: “Oh, so, it might not even be real? Why would they post if it wasn’t real?”

Me: “I don’t know. Without knowing what you saw, I can’t tell. I can only wrap it the way that I know or how you just described.”

Customer: “Oh, okay. You can just wrap it up like it was before, then. I’ll just take it the way it was.”

Me: *sighs, walks in the back to wrap it again*

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No Room For Argument

| AR, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(I work at an academic library and one of the services we offer is for our customers to check out study rooms. I take a call from a woman around noon.)

Caller: “I want to know if I can reserve a study room?

Me: “It’s first come, first serve, and we aren’t allowed to reserve them.”

(I have to repeat myself several times because she insists on a study room and isn’t actually listening to my answer. After I tell her for the fourth time:)

Caller: “That’s fine. I’ll be in at about six.”

(She asked for my name again, and hung up. Around five o’clock I left for the day. But my coworker told me what happened when this woman came in for a study room.)

Customer: “Hi! I have a study room reserved for six.”

Coworker: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we don’t reserve study rooms. It’s library policy.”

Customer: “Well, that’s not what [My Name] told me earlier! I was told I’d have a study room! Where am I supposed to study now?”

Coworker: “We do have a study area on the fourth floor if you’d like to use that. But it is an open space; I can’t guarantee how crowded it will be or the noise level. But since this is a library I can ask them to keep it down if it becomes too loud.”

Customer: “That is unacceptable! I was told I’d have a study room! I demand that that promise be kept!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, I was here when my coworker was on the phone with you. She told you several times that the study rooms are first come, first serve. But if you’d like I can give you a pager and let you know when the next available study room is open.”

Customer: “That is unacceptable! I demand you clear a study room right now! Or I’ll get you fired!”

Coworker: “First off, ma’am, I’m only volunteering over the summer so good luck getting me fired. Second, you had requested the room for six o’clock and you may only check the room out for an hour at a time because of how in demand they are. It is now seven forty. Even if we did do reserve rooms you would have missed your reservation and the check out time would have already elapsed. Third, you want me to recall a room, kicking someone out who also needs to study in the process, just so you can have your way? I’m not going to do that. Now, it’s fairly quiet on the fourth floor. You can study there either until you’re done studying or until a study room opens up. Or if you can’t be civil you can leave.”

(The customer got red faced, yelled for a few more minutes, cussing out me, my coworker, and library policy, then stormed out.)

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Littered With Demands

| Orlando, FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular, Transportation

(I’m moving out of the country, and so am selling/giving away 95% of my stuff. I have a very expensive automatic kitty litter box that retails at $400 that I’ve posted on Craigslist for free, as I don’t feel like dealing with cleaning it and selling it in the next 48 hours before my plane leaves. The post stipulates that the interested party must pick it up. This is a phone conversation.)

Woman Caller: “Hello, I’m calling about the kitty litter machine. Can you deliver it to my house?”

Me: “No, you must come pick it up. I live in [Town]. It retails for $400 new. I’m just too rushed to sell it before my plane leaves.”

Woman Caller: “But that’s 2 hours from me… Can’t you deliver it to my house?”

Me: “No. I would charge a $300 delivery charge.”

Woman Caller: “That’s too much! Why is it so much?”

Me: “Because I don’t want my car to smell like a litter box and I don’t have time to do it before my plane leaves. You can come pick it up for free, though.”

Woman Caller: “I don’t want my car to smell, either! What can we do to work it out?”

Me: “I’ll just give it to someone who will want to come to my house. Bye.”

(30 minutes later, another interested party picked it up.)

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Keeps Going Salon And On

Hastings, MN, USA | Crazy Requests

(I am working at the service desk. One of my duties there is to answer the phone. Usually I just have to park the call and page the department the customer wants. Occasionally they have a question for service desk. I get a call from a guy that sounds maybe in his 40s.)

Me: “[Store], how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I’m going to be in Thursday, but I was wondering – do you know if there’s a salon nearby you?”

Me: “Uh… one moment, sir.”

(I put the phone down and get my CSM. We quietly discuss for a second about the nearest hair cutter places, both of us exchanging a glance at the odd question.)

Me: “Okay, sir, there is a [Hair Salon #1] and a [Hair Salon #2] located near us.”

Customer: “Is that all you know of?”

Me: “Yes, sir.”

Customer: “You mean to tell me you don’t know of any salons next to your store?”

Me: “Uh… no, sir?”

Customer: *exasperated and annoyed noise* “Well, you just lost a customer!” *hangs up*

Me: Uh?

Coworker: “Did he REALLY call to ask about a salon?”

Me: “Yeah? And apparently we just lost a customer?!”

Coworker: “We’re a grocery store!”

Me: “That’s what I wanted to say!”

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Not Their Finest Hour(s)

| MI, USA | Crazy Requests, Time

(At rush hour on a Saturday night, a party of 16 people comes in. I am a hostess.)

Me: “It’s going to be about one-and-a-half hour wait for you guys.”

Customer: “Okay, we will stay.” *walks away*

Me: *writes down info including the time they came in*

(Twenty minutes later.)

Customer: *storms up to the host stand* “Where the h*** is our table?! We have been waiting for TWO HOURS!”

Me: “Sir, it’s still going to be a little bit. You came in at 7:20, it is now 7:40 and I quoted you at an hour-and-a-half, so it’s probably still going to be another hour.”

Customer: “This is BS. Are you stupid or something? We have been waiting two hours!”

Me: “If you want, I can get my manager for you so she can help you out.”

(My manager comes out, and says the same exact thing to them that I do. The customers proceed to go and tell all the people waiting that we are understaffed, that if I wasn’t a girl he would punch me in the face, and that we probably have bugs in the kitchen. Twenty minutes after that.)

Customer: “Can you people seriously not tell time? We have been waiting for hours!”

Me: “I promise I am trying to get tables for you as fast as I can, but it’s only 8:15 now so you still probably have another 45 minutes. It is Saturday night and there are other parties here. We do call ahead seating if you choose to come in with a large party again and want to speed up your wait time.”

Customer: “There is no way I am ever eating at this place again! I will report your horrible attitude to your manager!” *storms off*

(After all that, they still ate at the restaurant and ended up stiffing the server on an over $250 meal.)

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