Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Deathly Out Of Touch

| San Francisco, CA, USA | Bizarre, Books & Reading, Crazy Requests

(A woman walks up to my counter.)

Customer: “Hi. I’m looking for the Necronomicon.” *a book that supposedly teaches you how to summon spirits*

Me: “I think we have a copy over here.”

(I take her over to the section, find the book, and pull it out for her.)

Me: “Here it is!”

Customer: *looks suspiciously at the book* “Do you have any other copies? You touched that one!”

Me: “Um, yes, there is another copy on the shelf.”

Customer: “Good! And that one hasn’t been touched by human hands?”

Me: “…I’m pretty sure it has been touched, but it’s still shrink wrapped.”

Customer: “No, that won’t do. Are you sure you don’t have another copy that hasn’t been touched?”

Me: “No, ma’am, I’m pretty sure all of our books have been touched by human hands.”

Customer: “Darn. Well, call me if you get an untouched copy.” *leaves without giving me a phone number*

Blowing A Lot Of Hot Air About A Lot Of Gas

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(On this particular morning, the other baristas and I have to evacuate the building due to a gas leak on an upper floor. We are outside on the patio, waiting for fire rescue to finish checking it out.)

Customer: *walks up and tries to open the locked door*

Me: “Ma’am! Please do not go in!”

Customer: *pulls on the door again* “Why not? You’re supposed to be open!”

Me: “We had to evacuate the building due to a gas leak!”

Customer: “Well, you should have put up a closed sign!”

Me: “I’m sorry, we were instructed to exit the building as fast as possible so we didn’t have time.”

(The customer leaves in a huff. Two hours later, after we have reopened:)

Customer: “I can’t believe I had to come back because you guys were closed this morning!”

Me: “…Sorry. Again, we had to evacuate the building so we didn’t die.”

Customer: “Hmph!”

The Brain Is Vacant, The Room Is Not

| Dubai, UAE | Crazy Requests, Hotels & Lodging

(I work at the front desk of a big hotel, which is currently fully booked. One in-house guest would like to extend, but we have to decline. Finally, he comes to check out.)

Guest: “I think that what you are doing is really rude.”

Me: “How so, sir?”

Guest: “I wanted to extend my stay here, but you won’t let me.”

Me: “Yes, I am very sorry about that, but we are fully committed tonight, therefore we are not able to extend your stay. But hopefully next time, Sir.”

Guest: “But how can you possibly sell my room when I am still in there? You should ask me before you do that, so I can decide whether to stay or not.”

Me: “…”

The Death Of That Sale

| Germany | Crazy Requests, Transportation

(I work for a business that usually caters to B2B transportation. I’m responsible for the sender side of the transport and look after a lot of hair product and cosmetics manufacturers. The customers that make and sell hair products are especially obnoxious usually.)

Me: *picking up phone* “This is [Business]. [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I was wondering when this parcel will arrive.” *gives transportation number*

Me: “All right… Oh, it looks like the truck has been stopped due to a traffic accident. I’m not sure if we’ll be able to deliver this today.”

Customer: “What do you mean, you’re not sure? It’s very important that this arrives today.”

Me: “Let me call the depot and ask. I’ll call you back in a moment.”

(Speaking to my colleagues, I find out the truck has been the one actually involved in the accident, not just unable to get around the accident site. I call back the customer.)

Me: “I’m sorry; we really won’t be able to deliver this today. All other trucks—”

Customer: *interrupting* “No. This has to arrive today. It’s very important shampoo! Our customer needs it TODAY.”

Me: “The truck has been stopped because it was in an accident. There’s no other truck that can pick up the goods, because it’s almost four pm and every other truck is busy. Also, the police have confiscated the goods as well as the truck.”

Customer: “TODAY! I don’t see the problem! The driver can just get another truck, unload the parcels, get off his lazy a**, and continue!”

Me: “…The driver died in that accident.”

Customer: “So, get another one! It’s important shampoo!”

(I ended the call as politely as possible, telling her to best send out the goods again so they will arrive the next day for sure. She kept ranting until I hung up. Unfortunately, this happens way too often–usually in less extreme situations, fortunately.)

The Cake Eater Is A Lie

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(We’re a family business, and dad is serving at the counter while I’m packing up, as it’s late and we are nearing closing time. A customer storms in, holding a cake box, which would have held a cake serving 20-30 people.)

Customer: “Look, we just got this cake from you, and it was awful!”

Dad: “No problem. What was wrong with it?”

Customer: “It was stale. Like it had been sitting in the fridge for days!”

Dad: “Sorry to hear that. Can I take a look at it?”

(Dad opens the cake box to reveal barely one slice of the cake left.)

Dad: “…what happened to the rest of it?”

Customer: “Well, obviously we ate it all!”

Dad: “Seriously?”

Customer: “Yes! I want my money back! You ruined our party!”

Dad: “Sorry, but I can’t do that. And get the h*** out of my shop!”