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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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No ID, No Idea, Part 16

| Hampshire, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Criminal & Illegal, Popular

(We can sell alcohol and cigarettes to those that provide ID but as we often serve regular customers we don’t ask for their ID. The UK legal age to buy alcohol and cigarettes is 18. A regular customer walks in. He looks young but is actually of legal age to purchase said items.)

Customer: “I would like a packet of [Popular Cigarette Brand].”

Me: “Of course.”

(The customer leaves the store. A few minutes later my mum walks in with my sister.)

Mum: “Did you just sell cigarettes to a boy?”

Me: “Yes, but it’s okay. He’s over 18.”

Mum: “Okay, but you should know he just gave them to a girl in a school uniform.”

(I am stunned and a little annoyed but forget about the incident until later, when the customer walks back into the store to buy food.)

Customer: “Hey again, I forgot to pick up some things.”

Me: “No problem. Just to let you know, I can’t stop you from buying cigarettes for yourself, but in the  future I recommend you don’t give them to those that are underage.”

Customer: “I didn’t give my d*** cigarettes to anyone!”

Me: “A customer walked in after you purchased the cigarettes and told me you handed them to a girl in a school uniform.”

Customer: “Fine, whatever.” *pays and walks out*

(A little more time passes, I forget about the incident. I am stocking the shelves when a woman storms up to me.)

Woman: “You refused to sell my son cigarettes! He’s over legal age! We come in this store all the time!”

Me: *realising she’s talking about the earlier incident* “I’m sorry, I think there’s been some kind of miscommunication. I didn’t refuse your son service. I just told him he shouldn’t give his cigarettes to minors.”

Woman: “My son would never do such a thing! You’re a f****** liar!”

Me: “I have a very reliable eyewitness that he did.”

Woman: “Oh, so you have other customers spying on us now then? Who ratted him out?”

Me: “My mum. And to repeat myself: We have a very clear policy that we cannot sell +18 products to those intending to buy for those that are underage. If I sell cigarettes to your son and a police officer sees him give them to someone underage, he could suffer a huge fine and would could lose our license.”

Woman: “I don’t give a d*** about your f****** license.”

Me: “Well, I’m sorry to hear that.”

(The woman walks out. A few months later, I am working in a different store, but I decide to pop in to the original store to see how the manager is doing.)

Manager: “Hey, did you know that [Customer] got prosecuted?”

Me: “No, why?”

Manager: “They caught him selling cigarettes to minors.”

(Apparently the girl in the uniform was his sister and he’d been buying her cigarettes, which she’d been selling at her local school. Luckily they didn’t trace any of the purchases back to our company!)

Related:

No ID, No Idea, Part 15

No ID, No Idea, Part 14

No ID, No Idea, Part 13

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Damaging Customer Relations

| NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests

(I’m working in the handbags section of the store. A customer approaches me with two of the same bag, but in different colors. One has blue and green tones while the other is neutral colors, like brown, pale pink, beige.)

Customer: “Could I ask for your opinion?

Me: “Sure! Trying to decide between these two?”

Customer: “Yes. I like the green and blue better but I’m not sure what I’d wear it with.”

Me: “Well, the neutral colors would be easier to match, so you could get more use out of it.”

Customer: “Maybe I’ll get both.”

(The customer looks at the tags, and they are each $30. She doesn’t want to spend much more than that.)

Me: “If they were a little cheaper, I would say buy both.”

Customer:Can they be cheaper?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Can you get me a discount?”

Me: “I’m sorry, we only discount damaged merchandise.”

Customer: “Well, could you damage it?”

(I wait for her to laugh, but she just looks at me, expecting I will help her.)

Me: “No… No, I can not.”

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A Sad Sign Of The Times

Washington, DC, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(I am waiting in the express lane to buy groceries (15 items or fewer). The customer in front of me has a full cart.)

Cashier: “Excuse me, sir? This is the express lane.”

Customer: “Okay.”

Cashier: “Fifteen items or fewer.”

Customer: “What?”

Cashier: “It’s fifteen items or fewer for this lane. Since you’re already here, I’ll let you stay in line, but for the future, please use another lane.”

Customer: “Well… how was I supposed to know it was fifteen items or fewer? There should be a sign!”

Cashier: “It’s right there.”

(He points right above the customer’s head, where there’s a giant sign reading “EXPRESS LANE – 15 ITEMS OR FEWER.”)

Customer: *angrily pointing to a random spot next to the cash register* “Yeah, well, it SHOULD be over THERE!”

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Too Taxing For Them To Understand, Part 3

| UT, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Money

(I call a customer to collect payment for finished tax return.)

Me: “Hi, [Customer], I’m just calling to let you know your tax return is complete and you have a balance of [balance]. Once we collect this amount we will send you your return.”

Customer: “Uh, so I have to pay before you will send me my return?”

Me: “Yes, it is required that we collect payment before sending you the return.”

Customer: “Why? That seems weird. Why can’t you send me my tax return then let me pay you?”

Me: “Uh, because we would risk the chance of customers getting their tax returns and never paying us and the firm would go under…”

Customer: “Okay, I’ll pay… That is just so weird.”

Related:

Too Taxing For Them To Understand, Part 2

Too Taxing For Them To Understand

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Doctorate In Bread Required

| Barcelona, Spain | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging, Popular

(I work at a self-service buffet in a hotel. We have these little signs with the name of every dish except the very obvious ones. I am carrying drinks when a middle-aged guest comes to me and points to the bread aisle.)

Guest: “What is this?”

Me: “Emm… bread, sir.”

Guest: “How do I know this is bread? There is no sign at all.”

Me: “Well, it is obviously bread; it looks like bread, after all.”

Guest: “What if I never saw a piece of bread before? How do I know this is actually bread? You can’t expect us all to know that this is bread. Bring me your manager.”

Me: *fetches the manager*

Manager: “Sir, is there something wrong?”

Guest: “Why is there no sign for bread?”

Manager: “Well, it’s obvious that it’s bread.”

Guest: “This is ridiculous! You think we all have Oxford doctorates here? And you treat us like fools? That’s it! I’ve had enough! I’m filling in a complaint!”

(And he actually did…)

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