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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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Contracting Expectations

| MI, USA | Crazy Requests, Money

(I’m the biller for an upscale retirement home. The children of some of our clients help pay for the expenses, and in this case, the children have just decided to stop helping financially.)

Daughter:  “So we’ll need to renegotiate my parents’ rent to something they can afford on their own.”

Me: “Unfortunately, our rates are not negotiable. And since your parents are already in the smallest unit, we don’t have an option that would be cheaper for them. You may need to find them a cheaper place to live.”

Daughter: “What?! I’m not moving them to some cut-rate hell-hole! We chose this place because it’s the best in town. My parents are planning to live here for the rest of their lives.”

Me: “And I’m planning to charge the contract rate for anyone living in that apartment. Guess which one of us is going to get what they want?”

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Not Getting The Signal

| Austin, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Technology

(I’m in the boarding area of an airport with my friends. I’m using my phone’s personal hotspot to share WiFi with my friends when a lady comes up to me. Keep in mind that my hotspot has a password, like any other, to keep people from using my data.)

Lady: “Give me the password to your WiFi!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Lady: “I know you have WiFi! Give me the password!”

Me: “Sorry, but that’s my hotspot–”

Lady: “GIVE ME IT!”

Me: “Ma’am. You do not understand. THIS. IS. MY. WIFI. I’m not giving you my password.”

Lady: “Fine! I’ll just get you fired for hogging the WiFi!”

Me: “Good luck, because I don’t work here!”

(My friends and I think that that’s the end of her. But only five minutes later, she brings a manager over to “get me fired.”)

Lady: “See!? That’s him! He won’t give me the WiFi password!”

Manager: “Ma’am, first, I don’t know him because he doesn’t work here. Therefore, I can’t fire him. Second, our airline’s WiFi is free.”

Lady: “But…”

Manager: “Third, I’m sure he is using his own hotspot’s WiFi, so you’re just trying to get free WiFi from him.”

Lady: “So make him give me the password!”

Manager: “No.”

Lady: “Excuse me?”

Manager: “I said no, if you didn’t hear me.”

Lady: “THE CUSTOMER’S ALWAYS RIGHT!”

Manager: “Well, in this case, you certainly are not.”

Lady: *speechless*

Manager: “Now, are you going to go back to your seat to leave these POLITE flyers alone, or do I have to get security to escort you out of here?”

Lady: *looks at me, then to the manager, then back to me, then turns 50 shades of red and clambers back into her seat*

Manager: *to me* “Well, I bet she won’t bother you anymore!”

(Later we got the best seats for being polite and not causing a commotion, and I spotted her sitting between two bratty kids!)

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Targeting The Wrong Worker

| CA, USA | Crazy Requests

(While I typically don’t, my sisters and mother-in-law like to go do the Black Friday sales after Thanksgiving every year and they’ve invited me to join them. Since I enjoy bonding with them, I decide to go. I am wearing a red t-shirt. We’re currently in K-mart, where the employees wear blue, and I’m looking at some sport-themed blankets when another customer comes to stand by me.)

Customer: “Hmmm…”

Me: *still looking*

Customer: *loudly clears throat*

Me: *glances at her before going back to looking*

Customer: “Excuse me, I need to find [Item].”

Me: “Oh… ma’am, I don’t work here.”

Customer: “But you’re wearing red…” *she finally gets a good look at my shirt, which has a ninja on the front*

Customer: “I’m not in Target anymore, am I?”

Me: “No… No, you’re not.”

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Working In A High Pressure Environment

| UK | Crazy Requests

(A customer comes in to the health food store on Saturday.)

Customer: “I have high blood pressure and need something to make it go down. I have a test on Monday to get my HGV license back.”

Me: “I don’t think we have anything that will work that quickly, but exercise would also help.”

(We point out some remedies that might be useful.)

Customer: “How much?”

Me: “£8.99.”

Customer: “Okay I wasn’t looking to spend that much. I’ll do some exercise!”

(Miracle cure wanted or what?!)

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Crinkle Brain

| USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(My coworker and I teach art classes at a craft store. We are getting ready for a class when a customer pokes her head in the door and politely asks for help, acknowledging that we are busy. We of course say, “sure!” She is holding a packet of the crinkle stuff that is often used in Easter baskets or gift bags; picture something like confetti, but in long strips instead of little pieces.)

Customer: “Do you know how long each strip is?”

(I don’t know why customers think we have this information memorized. Well, it is in a bag all smushed up, so it’s hard to tell.)

Me: “We can open up the package and look.” *knowing that the package had a sticky closure that would seal right back up in case she didn’t want to buy it*

(I open it up and show her, then seal it again and hand it back to her. While I am doing that, she keeps asking very specific, weird questions that are either simple or impossible to answer, like asking if she can cut the strips smaller and how long that will take. It’s made of paper, so it is fairly self explanatory, I would think…. Then she says:)

Customer: “Thanks. But I do need one more thing from you. Show me where I got this from? I don’t remember.”

(Even though it is all the way across the store and we are busy with our class stuff, we agree. My coworker goes to show the lady and comes back fuming.)

Coworker: “That lady was f***** crazy!”

Me: “What did she do?”

Coworker: “The only reason she asked me to show her where that was is so she could get a new package because she didn’t want to buy the one you opened!”

Me: “Seriously?!”

Coworker: “Yeah, and she’s just going to take it home and rip it open anyway!”

(Mind you, I sealed it up almost perfectly to where you could barely tell it had been opened. And it was sealed completely so the item wasn’t in danger of falling out. I can understand if it was a gift or something, but it definitely wasn’t.)

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