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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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Katy Perry Fries

| USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(A clearly irate customer walks up to my counter holding a carton of fries.)

Customer: “These fries are too cold! Straight from the refrigerator, I’d gather!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry about that. I’ll get you another one.”

(I take back her fries, but before throwing them away, I try a piece–it tastes warm. Figuring she wants really hot fries, I get her some that are fresh out of the fryer.)

Me: “Here you go!” *hands customer the fries*

Customer: *tries a piece* “No, I can’t eat this! It’s still cold! It’s disgusting!” *storms away, leaving the fries behind*

Me: *baffled*

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Something Fishy About That Complaint

| FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Non-Dialogue, Pets & Animals

I work at a major chain pet store as customer service and a pet care specialist. I love animals and enjoy helping customers get set up with new pets, and I have several customers who come in and specifically ask for me. Unfortunately, a big part of the job is handling returns of pets who are deceased. My job is to replace the pet and advise them on anything that they could do to ensure success in keeping the pet.

In our store, customers fill out satisfaction surveys online that have an optional comment field. The managers post the comments each week. One day, I get called in to the manager’s office. She sternly tells me that there was a serious complaint about me in the surveys. She reads it to me and I turn redder and redder as she reads the long description of how a customer came in to return a bunch of fish that had died and I did not express sympathy for her loss. “Her cold, uncaring attitude and clear disregard for my emotional well-being and satisfaction as a customer make me feel too upset and traumatized to return to your store. I hope that you discipline her and perhaps terminate her as she doesn’t exemplify the love of animals that your store claims to represent.”

I was crying by this point. By the list of fish that the customer had described, I remembered the customers and that the interaction with them hadn’t been unusual at all. I had even said I was sorry to hear that their fish died and I spent 20 minutes with them trying to help them sort out why. They had even thanked me.

Despite my great record and all the compliments about me from other customers, my manager penalized me for the complaint, suggesting that I might consider finding another job if I didn’t care for animals. (She knew that I had everything from fish to reptiles to cats myself, so that was BS.) I had my hours cut and had to go through extra training.

Two months later, my manager came to me and apologized, saying that a customer had come in saying that they felt bad because they put in a joke complaint about an employee and were worried that she had gotten fired. Guess who? The reason they gave my manager: “We were drunk or high or something, and were just upset about the fish. Anyway, we’re sorry. She was actually really nice to us.”

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Not How Diabetes Works But Okay

| UK | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests

(We’ve been instructed to ask for customer feedback while checking customers out in the form of a questionnaire. Most is multiple choice with a comments section at the bottom. The line has died down when the receptionist, looking rather disgruntled, turns to us and reads out the feedback from their last customer.)

Comment: “Too helpful! Too nice! Tried having a chat with me and it was just abhorrent! Even her hello was so sweet it gave me diabetes.”

Receptionist: “I’m sorry we can’t all be as sour as gone-off bottle of milk!”

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Can’t See Your Point

| CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(I normally wear contact lenses, but my optometrist had trouble ordering them so I’m wearing my glasses today. A regular customer approaches me. She’s usually a bit of a handful but never anything crazy.)

Me: “How are you?”

Customer: “You have glasses. Why?”

Me: “There was an issue with my doctor’s office so I’m wearing my glasses until it gets fixed.”

Customer: “I don’t like it. Take them off.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t see without them so I can’t take them off.”

Customer: *huffs* “Well… I don’t like you anymore!”

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Returner Burner, Part 5

| Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(I work in a busy baby store where people always return nearly their entire purchases two weeks later.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

Customer: “I want to return these items.”

Me: “No problem. Do you have your receipt with you?”

Customer: “Yeah, here.”

(The customer hands me the receipt. I notice she is returning everything she purchased, at least 10 items, except a $5 t-shirt.)

Me: “Okay, so it will be [total] going back onto your card today?”

(The total was $5 less than the total she paid as she wasn’t returning the t-shirt.)

Customer: “What!? That isn’t right. I paid [total stated on receipt]. Why aren’t I getting all of it back. I should get all of it back!”

Me: “Um, madam—”

Customer: “See I will show you my bank statement”

Me: “Madam, the reason why you—”

(Before I can finish my sentence she starts shoving her phone in my face with her bank history on it.)

Customer: “See?! [Store] on the first of September, [total] was taken out of my account! Now give me that total back!”

(I begin to get annoyed so I raise my voice.)

Me: “I cannot return that total amount to you as you are not returning everything you purchased. You are not returning the t-shirt, is that correct?”

Customer: “Obviously.”

Me: “Therefore you will be getting the total amount back minus the cost of the t-shirt.”

Customer: “Well, you didn’t tell me that I wasn’t returning everything!”

(I completed the return just shaking my head. So did the customer waiting behind her.)

Related:
Returner Burner, Part 4
Returner Burner, Part 3
Returner Burner, Part 2

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