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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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Having An Off Day Off

| Fort Wayne, IN, USA | Crazy Requests

(I work two jobs, and one of them is at a dollar store near my house. Since I’m there fairly frequently, and because it’s so close to home, I tend to help close versus working the morning, thus seeing lots of people during the afternoon when everyone is getting off work and school. I see many regulars and they recognize me pretty easily since I work there so much. I’m shopping on my day off and standing in line to purchase some things, check my schedule, and then leave. We are busy so the manager-on-duty opens the second line, calling to anyone who wants to switch lines. No one moves, so after hesitating in case someone else moves I move next in line to purchase my items. Then, as I am heading to the door, a regular pipes up:)

Regular: “Hey, I know you work here, but next time things get busy you should just wait in the back of the store until everyone’s done.”

Me: *momentarily speechless* “Uh huh…”

(I chose that moment to leave, thinking that was the end of that. No dice. He apparently felt that my response was incorrect; he tried saying I said it was “beneath me” or what have you, a bunch of he said/she said. The manager-on-duty reiterated that I was A PAYING CUSTOMER on my DAY OFF and was, indeed, next in line. The regular contacted our district manager, who contacted our store manager, who spoke with the manager-on-duty, and she explained the situation. I still don’t understand what it was that offended him so much but, curiously, he’s not been in our store for over a month. Weird.)

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Some Customers Come With Baggage

| Salem, OR, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests

(Like many of the natural alternative grocery stores, we are bag-less. There are at least two huge signs on the door when you enter, and a sign at each register, and even signs on the box bins we have for those who forget their bags.)

Me: “That will be $9.95 today.”

Customer: “Aren’t you going to bag them? I want plastic.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, sir; we are a bag-less store. We have reusable bags for sale ranging from .99 to $6 dollars.”

Customer: “I don’t want to buy a d*** bag. I want you to give me a plastic bag.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we don’t have plastic bags.” *I point to the box bin* “We do have boxes for those who forgot their bags.”

Customer: “NO. I WANT A PLASTIC BAG. FORGET IT.”

(He then tried to carry all his items out in his hands, dropped several of them, and just gave up and dropped them all on the floor, breaking some, and then left…)

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Gate Crasher

| Canada | Crazy Requests

(The greenhouse I work at is small and locally owned so the retail section has only a padlocked fence surrounding the area for security. When closing, I lock the gate, close and balance the cash register, and then need to physically remove the register and drive it over to another building. In order to get the register to my car, which is parked outside the fence, I unlock and open the gate. As I do so, a customer comes out from around the corner and darts inside the fenced area.)

Me: *calling out* “Ma’am! Ma’am! We are closed and I need you to leave the premise now and please come back tomorrow if you need to make purchases.”

Customer: “You’re not closed; the gate was unlocked and opened!”

Me: “I simply had to load some heavy equipment, but unfortunately we are closed. Even if I wanted to check you out, I couldn’t because the register has been closed down and locked up for the night.”

Customer: “But the gate was open! Can’t I just look around?”

Me: “You want me to wait while you look around, knowing you cannot actually make any purchases?”

Customer: “Yes! I want to pick out what I want and have you put it aside for me!”

Me: “I’m really sorry, ma’am, but you’ll really need to come back during business hours as I need to get to get to other buildings before they lock up for the night.”

Customer: “How rude! I expected better service from a store that relies on local business!” *storms off*

Me: “…”

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Wish You Could Shoe Away This Customer

| USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money

Me: “Hi, [Customer], I see here you want to place an order for this shoe?”

Customer: “Yes, can we also get the brown pair as well?”

Me: “Of course, give me one moment!”

(I find the other shoe pretty quickly.)

Me: “Okay, you’re new total is $32.93.”

Customer: “No, that other agent said I would get free shipping!”

(I look over the order total. The shipping for an order with more than one item is, as I thought, 8.95. But it looks like the last agent gave her a $10 store credit to cover the shipping.)

Me: “It looks like you are only paying for the cost of the shoes; I see a $10 credit that has been placed on the account to cover the shipping.”

Customer: “No! My total is supposed to be 13 dollars!”

Me: “Ma’am, that would be your total if you had only one pair of shoes.” *breaks down the total for her of the two shoes [16.99 each] and the shipping, and then points out the ten dollar credit*

Customer: “Well, if I place one order with one item, and then I can call you guys back and place the second order, then will it be 13 dollars like he said it would?”

Me: “Ma’am, you can place all the orders you want with me right here, and placing the items on different orders would make it cheaper, but we do ask that you pay for the cost of the shoes.”

Customer: “Okay, let’s do that!”

Me: “Okay.” *takes one pair of shoes out of the cart* “Your total is $13.94. Do I have your permission to charge your card?”

Customer: “Why am I paying for shipping still?!”

Me: *considering disconnecting the call* “Ma’am, you aren’t paying for the shipping. Since there is only one item in the cart, your shipping is only 6.95. We gave you a $10 discount, so the shipping is free and the shoe itself is almost four dollars cheaper.”

Customer: *defeated* “Well, I’m just confused. I wasn’t told anything about any credit!”

Me: *deep breath while customer is on mute* “When we waive the shipping fee for you, we actually put a credit on your account to cover the shipping.”

Customer: *even more confused* “I want to talk somebody else.”

Me: *in a more firm, but still very nice tone* “Ma’am, no matter who you talk to math still works like math. If you have a shoe that costs $16.99 and shipping that costs $6.95, your total WILL be $23.94 normally, but we gave you a $10 discount on your order so your total is $13.94.”

Customer: “Okay, I’m confused but go ahead and place the order.”

Me: “Do I have your permission to charge your card in the amount of $13.94?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: *places order then gets the other shoe in the basket* “All right, now you have free shipping. I have the other shoe in your basket; do I have your permission to charge your card in the amount of $16.99?”

Customer: “No! The shoes are supposed to be 13 dollars! What is going on?”

Me: *goes quiet for what feels like forever* “The cost of the shoe is $16.99. Do I have your permission to charge your card in the amount of $16.99.”

Customer: “Well, I guess!”

Me: *places order* “Any other questions I can help you out with?”

Customer: “When should I expect to see them? I have an event I want to wear them at next week.”

Me: *our shipping timeframes are long, but the customer would know the timeframe if she’d read the very obvious description* “They should ship to us in 3-4 weeks because they are imported. Then they will ship out to you in one week.”

Customer: “YOU MEAN I HAVE TO WAIT—”

Me: “Have a good day, ma’am.” *click*

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That Exchange Didn’t Go Down The Toilet

| Abbotsford, BC, Canada | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I am working at a well known coffee shop in a local mall. Just before closing I am cleaning the bathrooms. One is out of order and I have just soaked the other bathroom with bleach when an older couple and their grandson walk up.)

Grandfather: “He needs to use the bathroom right now.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but one of our washrooms is out of order at the moment. I’ve just soaked this washroom in bleach but if you give me a couple moments I will have it available for use.”

Grandmother: “NO. He needs to use it right now. It is an emergency.”

Me: “If that is the case there is another set of washrooms just across the food courts that is open.”

Grandmother: “That won’t work. He needs THIS washroom RIGHT NOW!”

Me: “I’m sorry but I just need a moment to wipe the washroom down. It is covered in chemicals that could burn his skin if I let him use it right now.”

Grandfather: “Enough of this. You are lying to us. You just don’t want to let him use the bathroom!”

Me: “I’m sorry but I’m not lying. I am trying to clean this bathroom and in the time we have spent arguing I could have had the bathroom clean and ready for him to use.”

(At this point the couple and their grandson stormed off and I went about cleaning the washroom. A moment later the same couple came up and I saw the little boy peeing in a coffee cup. Once he was done, the grandfather wordlessly but smugly handed the cup to me. I was so taken aback I just stood there in shock holding a large cup full of this boys pee!)

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