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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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You’re Cheap And That’s The Tooth

| Belleville, IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Money

(I’ve taken my mother to the dentist’s office, and I’m sitting in the waiting room for her to be done. A lady comes rushing in, and has the following conversation with the receptionist…)

Woman: “Hi, I’m sorry, but I have a crazy request! I’m going to a doctor’s appointment, and I forgot to brush my teeth! Can I get a toothbrush from you? Do you have free toothbrushes, like, to give to patients? I don’t have time to go out to a store!”

(This street has a drug store, at least three grocery stores, about four convenience stores, and a big chain retail superstore all within a quarter mile. And this is a small town, where stores are all crammed onto a few main streets that you have to take to get anywhere.)

Receptionist: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We don’t have any dental hygienists, so we don’t carry toothbrushes to give out, even to patients.”

Woman: “Oh, no! But I’m going to a doctor’s appointment. I need to brush my teeth, and I just saw your sign and thought maybe you’d have some!” *laughs loudly*

Receptionist: “Well, sorry. There is a drug store right up the street.”

Woman: “No, then I’d be late! Oh, well.” *runs out*

(I don’t know why she thought walking into a random dentist office and trying to explain all that would on the slim chance that they might give her a toothbrush would be quicker than stopping into a store. Somehow, I got the feeling she just wanted a free toothbrush.)

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The Last Thing You Want In A Bank Is An Alarm

| UK | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

(I work in the customer service sector of a call centre for a well-known bank in the UK. I am working a later shift and it’s almost nine pm when an elderly gentleman calls.)

Customer: “Hi there, I’d like to order an alarm call.”

Me: “An alarm call… What exactly do you mean by that, sir?”

Customer: “You know, an alarm call! Like, you call me at a certain time?”

Me: “All right… is the call to discuss anything in particular to do with your bank account? Are you looking to make an appointment within a branch today?”

Customer: *getting frustrated* “NO, I just want you to call me at nine o’clock tomorrow morning to wake me up!”

Me: “Sir, that’s not a service we offer. Are you aware you’ve phoned the bank?”

Customer: “Yes! And it is a service you USED to offer. Why don’t you do it anymore?”

Me: “I can assure you that we have never ever offered an ‘alarm call’ service.”

Customer: “You’re bloody useless; I’ll try my other bank.”

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Schedule In Some Secrecy

| Chicago, IL, USA | Crazy Requests

Me: “[Firm]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Yes I’m calling for [Attorney].”

Me: “Sorry, he is not available.”

Caller: “Do you know when he might be available? I have a meeting with him later today.”

Me: “Sorry, I can’t say when that will be.”

Caller: “What, is it a secret?”

Me: “No, I DO NOT KNOW when he will be available.”

Caller: “Oh, okay! Thanks, honey.”