icon_bizarresilly

Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

icon_crazyrequests

Trash-Talking Hits The Bottom Of The Barrel

, | Malden, MA, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(I work in a city where the people have to buy city trash-bags that are expensive. We had to get rid of our trash barrel from outside the store because people started throwing away their home trash in it.)

Customer: *walking in with bag full of trash* “Do you have a barrel so I can throw away my trash?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we had to get rid of it.”

Customer: “Well, why?”

Me: “Because people started to bring their home trash to our store and leave it around our barrel because they didn’t want to buy city bags.”

Customer: “Well, that’s stupid. Where am I supposed to throw away my trash?”

Me: “At home with your city bags?”

icon_ruderisque

Send Him A Copy Of ‘The Scarlet Letter’

| Pleasant Hill, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular, Rude & Risque

(I work at a bookstore, and there’s a hotel just down the road. I’m standing at the info desk. My manager happens to be standing next to me during this call, helping another customer.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Bookstore]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Hey, I need you to call this number and send them to my room.”

(I’m confused, and think that maybe he has the wrong number.)

Me: “Uh, sir, this is a bookstore. Is there a book in particular that you’re looking for?”

Customer: “No, I want you to call [obviously not a legal name], and send them to room [number] at the [Hotel].”

Me: *face-palm* “Sir, I refuse to do that.”

Customer: *voice rising* “What kind of customer service is this?! Look, just make the call so that the number isn’t affiliated with me at all. It will take a minute, tops.”

Me: “No, sir, we don’t do that for our customers, let alone people who don’t shop with us.”

(The manager gives me a stern glance at my tone.)

Customer: “Then put someone on the phone who will!”

Me: “Sir, I will not call a prostitute to your room!”

(My manager jumps and both he and the customer stare at me.)

Me: “Nor will anyone else here, sir. Do not call this number again!”

(I hang up on him.)

Manager: “Normally I’d write you up for talking to someone like that but…” *shakes his head* “What’s the hotel and room number?”

(I give it to him. He then shares the information over the walkie-talkies to the rest of the evening crew and tells them that under no circumstances are we to do anything requested from that location.)

A Mite-y Big Problem

| NY, USA | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

(I work in an animal hospital as a receptionist, and answer a phone call.)

Me: “[Veterinary Hospital]. This is [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes. I came there a few years ago with my cat. I also have pet rats and I think I got mites from them. I have lots of bites on me and my skin is very itchy. My dermatologist told me to bring a sample of the bugs to a vet to have them looked at under a high powered microscope.”

(I really wish I could say no humans ever came to us or called us wanting to be treated, and that this man was the first, but I sadly cannot.)

Me: “Oh, umm… well, sir, firstly, we do not treat humans—”

Customer: “I know! I don’t want you to TREAT me. I just want you to look at the mites under a high powered microscope and tell me what kind they are so my dermatologist can treat me!”

Me: “I understand sir, but the veterinarian won’t—”

Customer: “Yes, I know. I just need you to look at them under—”

Me: “I know, sir. But the vet doesn’t treat or research for humans in any way.”

Customer: “But I got them from my pet rats.”

Me: “I understand. But regardless of where you believe they came from, the vet will not look at them. Animal mites do not remain on humans. And your dermatologist would not send you to a vet, because he or she knows vets do not see humans, and he or she should have the means to look at your mites or send them out to be looked at.”

(This goes on for several minutes, and to get him to hang up, I say I’ll give his name and number to the vet, but tell him not to expect a call because she doesn’t work with people. Fast forward to six hours later, when we’re half an hour past closing time, but cannot lock the doors yet because the last appointment is still in the building. A greasy looking man walks in, clothes dirty and disheveled, and he smells faintly of alcohol.)

Customer: “I called earlier to have the doctor look at my mites with a high powered microscope.”

Me: “Yes sir, you spoke to me. I told you not to come in, and that we won’t look at the mites. And we closed half an hour ago so there’s nothing else I can do for you right now.”

Customer: “Is there a school around here where I can use a high powered microscope? Or can you look at the mites for me?”

Me: “No, sir. I don’t know any schools that will allow that, and nor will I look at the mites. I have to ask you to leave, and contact a human doctor.”

(It took a while, but he FINALLY left, still muttering about his pet rats, mites and high powered microscopes.)