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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

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Expects You To Be A Non-Profit Prophet

| USA | Crazy Requests, Popular

(I work as a customer service representative for a small start-up company that produces a product that is aimed towards the education community. We are communicating over customer help chat.)

Me: “Good afternoon; can I help you?”

Customer: “I work for a non-profit and was wondering what discount I could get?”

Me: “Certainly, we would just need to verify that you are in fact a legitimate non-profit and we have a few forms.”

Customer: “Yeah, okay, but we can get it for free, right?”

Me: “Depending on what you do, we have several different options.”

Customer: “Oh, my god. You aren’t answering my question quick enough. No, you won’t even get my business. You should work on how you talk to your customers and how you get to the point!” *customer disconnects*

Me: “Seriously?”

(I was going to happily give them a discount until that…)

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Don’t Cheese Off America

| MA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Popular

(I work as a deli worker at a bit of a pretentious whole food type store. We often only sell specialty and healthy items and don’t have over-processed food. I thought I had seen everything… Nope.)

Me: “Good afternoon, what can I slice for you today?”

Customer: “I want two pounds of American cheese”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, we don’t sell American cheese, but Havarti tastes quite good and is a good substitute.”

(The customer looks at me, enraged. Note that we have a list of our available meats and cheeses behind me.)

Customer: “How dare you not sell it? This is America! Do you hate our country?”

(He is in fact very serious and very angry and storms off and abandons his other groceries.)

Coworker: “Did he really just ask if we hate America?”

Me: “Yup…”

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Throw In Some Goat Cheese While You’re At It

, | Australia | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Pets & Animals, Popular

(I work the night shift at a fast food restaurant making the orders. It is about 2 a.m. and my coworker is taking an order in the drive-thru at the speaker box and I’m listening in.)

Customer: *incoherent rambling with the word “goat” in there somewhere*

Coworker: “Sorry, I can’t understand you; can I take your order at the window?”

Coworker: *to me after taking their order* “They want to know if you can make a salad for their goat.”

Me: *laughing* “I guess I can do that. This is the first time I’ve made an order for a goat.”

(They had a goat in the back seat of their car and gave it the salad. On my way home from work in the morning, I found the goat tied to a power pole. As it turned out, it wasn’t their goat. Luckily, I found its owner and it got home safely.)

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Not The Most Gifted, Part 2

| Norway | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Popular

(I work at a café at a mall that sells gift cards you can use at every store within the mall, but it is also clearly stated that you cannot use these gift cards at any of the stores where food is sold (cafés, bakeries, supermarkets, etc.). It’s a very busy day right before Christmas, and a customer is ordering some food.)

Customer: “That’ll be it!” *takes out the mall’s gift card* “So, how do I do this? Do I just swipe?”

Me: “Oh, sorry, we do not accept the mall’s gift cards.”

Customer: “But that’s ridiculous! It says on the back of it that it can be used everywhere at this mall!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you can’t use it here or at any of the other cafés in the building. It’s written on the back of the gift card as well as on the webpage where it’s bought.”

Customer: *raising his voice and leans over the counter* “BUT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PAY FOR MY FOOD?”

Me: “You’ll have to pay with something besides the gift card, and if you don’t have any money, I’ll have to ask you to step aside so I can take someone else’s order.”

Customer: *swears under his breath and walks away*

(About 10 minutes later, the customer arrives with one of the mall’s security guards. The guard walks up to me.)

Guard: *whispering* “I really don’t know what to do with this guy. We’ve all tried to explain to him that he can’t use the card here, but he won’t give up! Is there something you can do?”

(Meanwhile the customer had been standing next to the people waiting in line swearing and talking loudly to the customers about the terrible service and incompetent employees. We ended up giving him his meal for free, and less than a week later he tried the same thing at one of the other cafés. The management at the mall then took away his gift card (worth $80) for the two meals (worth $50). The man was very satisfied with the mall finally taking his gift card as payment.)

Related:
Not The Most Gifted

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Don’t Burst Their Entitlement Bubble

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Popular

(I’m a supervisor for a high-traffic box office during a yearly theatre festival. It is a busy spell on a Saturday during closing weekend. A woman runs up to the counter yelling for help, carrying her large child – I’d say around eight years old – cradled in her arms. He is hysterical and I immediately approach her thinking some horrible accident has happened.)

Me: “Are you okay?! What’s happened?”

Lady: “MY CHILD HAS JUST HAD BUBBLES BLOWN INTO HIS EYES! I WANT A FULL REFUND!”

Me: *trying sooooo hard not to smile* “Oh, no! First, can I help your son wash his eyes? We have a tap around the back of—”

Lady: *not moving* “He blew them directly into his eyes. This is absolutely disgusting.”

Me: “Okay, what show did you just see and where was the venue?”

Lady: “We saw Mr. Bubbleman and he was trying to blow his bubbles into the children’s eyes! We even sat at the back of the audience because I had a feeling this was going to happen and now look! I want a full refund and I don’t care about your ‘no refund policy’!”

Me: “I’m so sorry this has happened and while I can’t authorize a refund, I can quickly go speak to the producer of the show about what’s happened and he could possibly refund you directly?”

Lady: “I can’t believe this!” *she’s still holding her giant child* “This service is terrible. Why won’t you help my son? Mr. Bubbleman will lie! He’ll tell you he didn’t do it but he did! If he acts dumb, just you tell him that I’m going to have to go straight to hospital because of him!”

(Her bratty child isn’t even crying anymore and seems to be bored of the situation – trying to wiggle out his mum’s arms.)

Me: “Look, on behalf of the festival, I really apologise. If you stay here, I’ll run over and quickly speak to the producer.”

(I sprint to the venue and grab the producer and start to explain the situation, trying to be careful not to escalate the situation more. Before I even finish, he jumps in and just looks really sad.)

Producer: *sighs* “Yeah, refund her…”

Me: “Really? I mean, that’s total bull-s***! She’s accusing you of deliberately blowing bubbles in the children’s eyes?! I mean, that’s crazy! Your show is a bubble show; wouldn’t you assess the ‘risks’ before you even bought tickets?”

Producer: “Of course I know it’s complete bull-s***, but I learnt quickly in this business not to argue with over-bearing mothers with screaming, spoilt children.”

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