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Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Eventually Had A Bulb Moment

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Money

(One quiet afternoon a friendly looking lady approaches the counter:)

Customer: “Good afternoon, I’m looking for a new bulb for my sewing machine.”

Me: “Sure, we sell a few different bulbs here. What model is your machine?”

(She states the model, which has been discontinued for several years.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, ma’am, but as that is an older machine we don’t stock parts for it.”

(My coworker overhears the conversation and chimes in.)

Coworker: “I was at [Other Location] the other day. I know they have them.”

(Our other store is a lot bigger and around 30 minutes away. The customer’s face suddenly turns dark.)

Customer: “I WOULDN’T DRIVE TO [OTHER LOCATION] WITH A GUN TO MY HEAD.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am—”

Customer: “YOU GUYS SELL POTS AND PANS AND BALLOONS AND OTHER CRAFT S*** BUT YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE THINGS TO DO BASIC SEWING.”

Me: “With all due respect, ma’am, we are as much a craft, party, and home decorating store as we are a fabric and sewing store. Now if you like I can call [Other Location] and have them send the bulb here, but it may take several weeks.”

Customer: “BULLS***. I’m going to [Competitor] and getting the bulb off them! See if I ever come back to your store again!”

(She dumps her basket on the counter and stomps off.)

Next Customer In Line: “She’d really rather get shot than drive 30 minutes up the road?”

These Seats Are Mine Because I Did The Time

| Phoenix, AZ, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Movies & TV

(Opening night for new movies is extremely busy. Lines start forming an hour before the movie starts. My friends and I go to see a new movie, stand in line for 90 minutes, and get our perfect seats – back center. As the theater fills up, people coming in start asking others to move over so they can sit together.)

New Guy: “Can you guys move over so we can sit together?”

Me: “No.”

New Guy: “Excuse me?”

Me: “There’s plenty of open seats. If you want to sit together, sit somewhere else.”

(The guy walks away and comes back a few minutes later with an usher and a smug smile.)

Usher: “Sir, could you please move over so these people can sit together?”

Me: “Sure. Just give me a gift card to cover the cost of my and my friends’ tickets.”

Usher: “What?”

Me: “We got here an hour and half early to get these seats. If you want us to move, then refund us the cost of our tickets. Otherwise, this guy who walked in 10 minutes before the movie starts can sit somewhere else.”

Usher: *turns to the other customer* “Sir, there are plenty of other seats to choose from in the theater.”

Creating An International Incident

| Salt Lake City, UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Geography, Transportation

(I work at an Japanese car brand’s USA customer service center. Because of the differences in laws and regulations, there are actually several different companies – USA, Canada, Europe, etc.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Car Brand]. My name is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Yeah, I want to make complaint! I had to leave my car at the dealership overnight for maintenance and the next morning there was a big scratch in the paint along one side.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that! I will be happy to help you file a report. Where is the dealership? What city and state?”

Caller: “It’s in Tel Aviv.”

Me: “What state is that in?”

(There are lots of towns and cities in the USA named after places in other countries.)

Caller: “Oh, it’s not in the US. Tel Aviv is in Israel!”

Me: “In that case, sir, you’ve reached a wrong number. You need to call [Car Brand] of Israel to make your report.”

Caller: “I did! But I didn’t like their answer, so I decided to call you!”

The Internet Loves Stories About Them, Too

| Dallas, TX, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Technology

Customer: “Excuse me, ma’am, where would I go to complain to a manager?”

Me: “What is the issue? Maybe I can help?”

Customer: “Forget it. I’ll just go complain on the Internet.”

Me: “Are you sure? It won’t be but a couple of seconds.”

Customer: “Yes, I’m sure. The Internet loves this stuff.”

Me: *gives him a weird look* “Well, okay then. Have a good day!”

(I later tell my manager what happened, and he just laughs.)

Manager: “Okay, I’m sure he’ll get real far with that. One less dumb-a** I have to deal with.”

She Has Taken The Black

| Scotland, UK | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging

(I am a breakfast chef at a five-star hotel. We have a lot of North American customers who are unfamiliar with some popular European foods. A waiter draws my attention to an order they have just taken.)

Waiter: “Vegetarian breakfast with black pudding. I tried explaining but she just shoo-ed me away.”

(Black pudding is made from pigs’ blood.)

Me: “Do you want to check again, that she’s sure?”

(The waiter goes off to check again with the customer and returns a minute later.)

Waiter: “She’s sure. She ate it before and it was delicious. And she isn’t very happy at her order being questioned.”

Me: “I’ll just go and check.”

(I go to the customer’s table.)

Me: “Are you a vegetarian, ma’am?”

Guest: “Yes. Yes, I am.”

Me: “Are you aware of what black pudding is?”

Guest: “Look, I had it for the first time a few days ago and it was delicious. Now, just get me my d*** breakfast.”

Me: “Can I just explain…”

(I go into the full details of how black pudding is made, with the boiling of the pigs’ blood, the addition of oatmeal and diced pig fat, etc. I note the customer going greener and greener as the story goes on.)

Guest: “Actually, could I just have cereal and toast, please?”

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