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Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

Vis A Visa

| Canada | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Funny Names

(I am the tired and barely attentive customer in this story.)

Employee: “How can I help you today?”

(I proceed to order my coffee.)

Employee: “And what name should I put on the cup?”

Me: “Oh. Uh, Visa.”

(The employee dutifully writes Visa on the cup without another question.)

Employee: “And how will you be paying today?”

Me: “Oh… Yeah… Visa.”

(Apparently I needed that coffee more badly than I realized.)

She Really Needed That Coffee

| ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(As I’m working the till, an old man walks up to me. It takes a few minutes to fill out his order, because he can barely speak, and his finger shakes when he tries to tell me what he wants. He is extremely polite, and orders two coffees. After he leaves to get coffee stirrers, a young woman comes to my till.)

Customer: “Oh, my God, what a drag, huh? That guy was such a dumba**. He should just die and move over for the best generation. Am I right?”

Me: “…Why don’t I just take your order.”

(As she ordered, the old man, who heard what she said, walked up behind her quietly, popped the lid off of one of his coffees, and poured it all over the woman. She screamed, and ran away yelling about her clothes, while the old man ordered another coffee.)

Knows How To Press The Good Buttons

| NY, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

(I’m working as a cashier at a popular fast food restaurant and have had a pretty rough night so far. I’m just finishing up an order on a young lady when I notice a button from a TV show I like on her purse.)

Me: “Oh, you like [TV Show]?”

Customer: *gives me a deer in the headlights look* “…The TV show?”

Me: “Yup.”

Customer: *a freaked out look starts to form*

Me: *points to the button on her purse after seeing the freaked out look* “You have a button with the main character’s face on it.”

Customer: *looks at her purse and calms down* “Oh! For a second I thought you could read my mind.”

Me: *laughs* “Oh, if I could read minds I would not be here. I would go play poker and win all the money!”

(The customer laughed too and we talked briefly about the show before she went to wait for her food. I continued to go on with my shift in much higher spirits. It’s rare, but getting customers that are able to cheer me up, is a blessing on bad shifts.)