Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

Big Mac Attack

, | Fond du Lac, WI, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Health & Body

Customer: “I’ll have a Big Mac, please.”

Customer’s Wife: “Oh! No onion on that.”

Customer: “Oh, yeah, no onions. I’m really allergic to them.”

Me: “You know that there’s onions in the Mac Sauce, right?”

Customer: “Really? Wow, well that explains why I feel funny every time I eat a Big Mac…”

Be My Guest And Just Leave

| San Francisco, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(I work at a national chain store that sometimes offers promotional gift cards for certain purchases. These change constantly and people are always getting them wrong; they buy the wrong brand, wrong size, or don’t buy enough to qualify. If they point out a problem during the checkout there’s usually something I can do (ranging from figuring out where they went wrong to just giving them $5 off something if they complain enough). Once the transaction is over, however, it’s over. I can’t do anything.)

Woman: “Um, I was supposed to get a $5 gift card?

Me: *holding the receipt for the completed transaction* “Oh, really? What do you think was supposed to show it? It didn’t come up on the register.”

Woman: “These!” *waves small packets of feminine hygiene products*

Me: “Actually, I think the promotion is on the larger size. It didn’t come up.”

Woman: “You think, or you know?”

Me: “Well, these promotions change all the time and it didn’t ring up, so…”

Woman: “Can you just give me the gift card?”

Me: “Well, this transaction is actually completed. However, if you want to go upstairs to Guest Services I’m sure they’ll be able to sort it out for you.”

Woman: “Are you kidding me? I have to go to Guest Services for this? I don’t want to go that far!”

(We’re at the foot of the escalator that drops people off right in front of Guest Services. She’d have to walk about a hundred feet, not counting the escalator.)

Me: “Uh, okay. I’m really sorry, but there’s nothing that I can do about it now. The transaction is over.”

Woman: “I’m not going to Guest Services! Just take the [Product] off. I don’t want them!”

Me: “Ma’am, I can’t—”

Woman: “I only bought them for the gift card. If I’m not going to get the gift card I don’t want them, and I want them taken off.”

Me: “…Okay, so. Returns are upstairs at Guest Services.”

A Lack Of Considerate Driving

| Mission, BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Health & Body

(I am around seven-months pregnant with my daughter. I am working on drive-thru. The customer drives up to the window after placing her order. She is pretty much as far away from the window as she can be.)

Me: “Hi there. That will be [total].”

(The customer hands me the money. She doesn’t try to help me out by reaching her arm out so I reach out as far as my belly will let me and managed to get her money. I punch in what she gave me and handed her the order and then her change. I accidentally drop a dime as she makes no effort to reach out for the change so I basically have to rest my belly on the counter.)

Customer: *tries to hand me back all her change* “Want to try that again without dropping it?”

(I am a little cranky at the fact that she couldn’t pull up to the window properly or at least reach her hand out more, and my bosses have always backed me up, so at this point I don’t care.)

Me: “Want to try pulling up to the window properly? I’m pregnant and I basically had to climb the counter because you’re an idiot. If you can’t pull up to the window you could at least make an effort reaching for your change instead of being rude and making me squish my stomach into the counter.”

(She didn’t answer and just drove away.)

Yesterday, All My Combos Seemed So Far Away…

| ME, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money

(It is my second day: An old customer comes in and rattles off a long combo order. Still getting used to the registers, I hit a wrong key, which causes the price to register without the combo discount.)

Me: “Okay, your total is [amount].”

Old Customer: “NO, it is NOT! It should be [different amount]. You did the same thing to me last week!”

Me: “…I just started yesterday, sir.”

Should Have Declined The Marriage

| USA | At The Checkout, Love/Romance, Money

(Customer walks up with his wife and a basket of items of which he spends ten minutes looking over and returning over half. With what he’s kept he lets me ring him out, then decides to pull out a check that has been scribbled over with five different store names.)

Customer: “You can take this as long as I initial it, right?”

Me: “Actually, sir, I don’t think I can because of the amount of times it’s been written over.”

Customer: “Oh, sure, you can take it.” *he tries to write our store name in the bottom corner*

Me: “I’m afraid not. However, if you have any other tender I can take that.”

(He has a white out pen in the items he is trying to purchase.)

Customer: “What if I used white out? Can I open that one and see if it will work?”

Me: “You unfortunately won’t be able to use it until it’s purchased. I can call my manager just to ensure you we can’t take the check, if you’d like.”

Customer’s Wife: “Well, then, do it. We don’t have all night for your incompetence.”

(The manager arrives and states that we cannot take his check but are glad to take any other tender.)

Customer’s Wife: *to her husband* “Just great! Give me your card, dumb-s***. Probably nothing on them since you’re always broke.”

Me: “Sorry, that card was declined.”

(She storms out of the store while he husband is asking her a question.)

Customer: “Sorry, she wrote on my last check to the wrong place.”

(He continues to slide cards that are coming up declined. Eventually he gives up and before leaving shouts:)

Customer: “Don’t ever get f****** married!”

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