Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

Automated And Medicated

| LA, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests

(We are the busiest pharmacy in the area, and this day is no exception. To make matters worse, we are short-staffed and our delivery truck is several hours late. I am running the drive-thru at about 6 pm, which is about 10 cars deep.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I’m here to pick up a prescription for [Name].”

Me: “It looks like we were out of stock of that medication, but let me check to see if it arrived on the truck.”

(I check the delivery record and we did receive the medication. However, because none of the boxes are put up, and it is the middle of the evening rush, we won’t be able to fill the order for a few hours.)

Me: “Ma’am, we did receive the medication on the truck, but we haven’t had a chance to unload the boxes yet, so if you would like to check back this evening…”

Customer: “I was told it would be ready this afternoon!”

Me: “I apologize, ma’am. Normally we would have it ready then but our truck just arrived less than an hour ago and we haven’t been able to put away the medication yet.”

Customer: “Well, someone should have called me to tell me it wasn’t ready! I drove all the way from [20 minutes away] to get my medicine and it’s not even ready!”

Me: “Are you signed up for our automated calls and text messages?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Me: “…and you got a call or text telling you your prescription was ready?”

Customer: “Well… no…”

Me: “…”

(The customer gave me a dirty look as she angrily drove away.)

Give Her Family Credit

| Canberra, ACT, Australia | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Money

(Our system uses a PLU (Product Listed Under) list, which consists of numbers from 1-200, which are used for produce, milk, flowers, and meat coming through the registers. It has been a long busy day and I was getting a bit bored with repeating the same spiel over and over, so I decided to mix it up a little bit.)

Me: “Your total comes to $94.55. Would you like to pay by cash, card, or firstborn child today?”

Customer: “Firstborn child? How much is she worth?”

Me: *turns to customer’s daughter* “How old are you this year?”

Customer’s Daughter: “I’m five and two thirds!”

(I put the number five into the system, which corresponds with a 750 gram bag of tomatoes, worth $3.50.)

Me: *to the customer* “She’s worth $3.50.”

Customer: “D***, not enough. It’ll have to be card.”

(The transaction finishes and she starts to head off.)

Customer: “Can I pay with my husband next time?”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 34

| OR, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

(I’m next in line at a chain arts and crafts store. Everyone who shops here complains about how long the lines always are, and how there are never any employees around, but I think it’s more because there is ALWAYS a difficult customer at the front of the line.)

Customer: “I’d like to do an even exchange, this ribbon for this yarn. I don’t have a receipt for the ribbon.”

Cashier: “Well, we don’t do exchanges without a receipt, but I can do a return on the ribbon and then we can use the money you’ll get back toward the yarn.”

Customer: *death glare at the cashier* “Fine.”

Cashier: “It looks like you’ll get $2.61 back for the ribbon. I’ll just put that toward the yarn if that’s okay?

Customer: “Yes.”

Cashier: “Okay, and the yarn comes out to $2.51. So you’ll actually get a dime back!”

Customer: “WHAT?! I TOLD YOU I WANTED AN EVEN EXCHANGE! WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID?!”

Cashier: “Ma’am, this is just the price of the yarn. I have nothing to do with it. It’s in your favor. You’re getting money back.”

Customer: “WHY WOULD I WANT MONEY BACK?! I HATE THIS STORE! EVERYONE HERE IS SO INCOMPETENT!”

(Everyone in line stares in confusion as she storms out of the store with the yarn and not the dime. As I’m next in line, the cashier looks at me.)

Cashier: “Well, then. Looks like you get a 10-cent discount on your purchase, miss! I hope that’s okay; I know money’s so darn inconvenient these days!”

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 33
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 32
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 31

Crazy Requests Only Go In One Direction

| UK | At The Checkout, Awesome Workers, Crazy Requests

(I work in a shop that sells comics, video games, trading cards, and assorted trinkets related to the culture around them. I work in the back where I test incoming consoles to check for issues. Between the back and the front is a small hole in the wall where I see a customer with a problem.)

Coworker: “That’s gonna be £32.20.”

Customer: “Wait, I have the deal here.”

(The place is running a small deal where you get 10% of the cheapest item if you present a flyer with the deal written on the back. My coworker proceeds to change the price accordingly. I get called to the front while the customer speaks to the owner. After hearing him rant for about five more minutes:)

Customer: “I can’t believe you advertize a deal and not follow up on it. The [Competing Store] down the road would give me all this for free for all the trouble. What can YOU do for me?”

Me: “Give you directions to [Competing Store]?”

Her Threat Is Not Worth The Paper It’s Written On

| Lake Forest, IL, USA | At The Checkout, Wild & Unruly

(My store offers customers the choice between paper and plastic bags. As we are very busy in the days leading up to Easter, we run out of paper bags and only have plastic. It is now the day after Easter. An old woman comes up to my register with a small cart of items.)

Me: “Hello, did you find everything you needed?”

Customer: “Yes. I need all this in paper.”

Coworker: *who is bagging* “I’m sorry, ma’am, we ran out of paper bags.”

Customer: “Now, I said I’d NEVER shop here again if you ran out of paper bags.”

Me: “I’m sorry; we ran out just Saturday. It—”

Customer: “Well, [Other Grocery Store] never runs out of paper bags! This store is just too cheap to buy enough paper bags.”

Me: “I’m sorry but I can’t speak for [Other Grocery Store]. All I know is that it was very busy Friday, very busy Saturday, and paper bags don’t come in until Tuesday.”

Customer: *gives me a look of pure hate*

Me: “Your total is [total].”

(I finish bagging her grocery in silence and hand her her receipt.)

Me: “All right, you have four bags. Would you like some help outside today?”

Customer: “No, just put it in the cart.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we’re not allowed to let the carts outside of the store. I’d be happy to help—”

Customer: “Just keep your d*** groceries!”

(The customer walks right out the door and leaves behind her paid-for groceries. I don’t know what to do, so I just go and tell my supervisor. She freaks out and gets me freaked out about what our store manager will say to both of us. The customer’s groceries are still just sitting at my register. 15 minutes later my customer comes back, somehow looking both haughty and intensely embarrassed.)

Customer: “Well, since they’re mine, I’ll just take them.”

Me: “Do you need help out—”

Customer: “NO!”