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Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

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The Story Isn’t Worthy Of The Magazine

| Melbourne, VIC, Australia | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

(I work at a large supermarket chain which releases a new free magazine for customers each month which includes recipes as well as information about new products we sell and promotions we are running. The magazines are very popular and as each store only gets a certain amount, and there is no limit to how many a customer can take, it’s not uncommon for us to run out before the month is over. This takes place the day the new magazine has come out.)

Customer #1: “I love these magazines! Would it be all right if I took three?”

Me: “You can have as many as you would like!”

Customer #1: “Awesome!” *jokingly* “I like to sell them on the black market!”

Me: *jokingly* “The trick is to wait until we run out, then you’ll make a killing!

(After Customer #1 has left, Customer #2 puts at least ten of the magazines in his bag.)

Customer #2: “I can’t believe idiots pay money for these! I can’t wait to make millions!”

Me: *laughs as I think he’s joking*

Customer #2: “I bet I can get at least $50 per magazine!”

(Out of morbid curiosity I later checked online. It turned out he tried to sell a free magazine online and got no bids. Clearly he thought free magazines would be a hot selling item at $50 plus $10 shipping each.)

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It Doesn’t Matter As Long As It Matters

| Chicago, IL, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

(Our chocolate and vanilla cupcakes have a lot of variation in decoration from icing color to type of sprinkle. Some version of this conversation happens several times a day.)

Me: “Do you have a decoration preference?”

Customer: “Oh, it doesn’t matter.” *as I reach for the nearest cupcake* “Oh, no, I wanted the blue one!”

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Leave Them All Hanging In The Line

| Racine, WI, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(A new store has just opened in the local mall, and as a result, is still working on fully staffing. As a result, the place is pretty busy. I am there as a customer, waiting in line to purchase a few items. There are only two registers open at the moment, so the line is getting quite long. Nearby the line are a couple racks with hangers on them, and a sign.)

Sign: “In order to get your purchases home faster, please remove your hangers and leave them here.”

(Despite the sign, no one pays much attention to it save me, and my items don’t come with hangers, so it doesn’t apply. I am currently standing between two customers, Customer #1 in front of me and Customer #2 behind.)

Cashier: *calling out for the whole line to hear* “Hi, everyone! If you’re buying any clothing items, if you could please remove your hangers and hang them on the racks beside you in line, it would be a big help!”

Customer #1: “Isn’t that their job?”

Customer #2: “Yeah. I don’t think I got a job here without anyone telling me.”

Me: *speaking out loud, but as if talking to myself* “Maybe they’re just trying to get the line through faster.”

(Neither of the other customers said anything after that, but when Customer #1 was called to the next register, I watched her start removing the hangers herself, leaving them on the counter for the cashier to remove when she could have just as easily removed them while she was still in line.)

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Taking Their Baggage With Them

| MI, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid

(I am bagging groceries at a local grocery store and my cashier rings up only about 3-4 items. I put them all in one bag to be eco-friendly.)

Customer: “Oh, honey, that’s too heavy for me. Can you separate those into three separate bags?”

Me: “Sure, no problem.”

(I take the lady’s items and put them in three separate bags, taking extra time to distribute the little weight evenly.)

Me: “Here you go, ma’am.”

Customer: “Thanks!”

(She proceeded to grab all three bags in one hand and walk out the door.)

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This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 59

| Ashland, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Extra Stupid, Money

Customer: “So I want to do $40 cash, and the rest on my debit card.”

Me: “That’s fine.”

(I put the cash through, same as any other order, and then…)

Me: “Okay, go ahead and slide your card now.”

Customer: “But I left it at home.”

Me: *stunned* “You left it at home?”

Customer: “Yeah… Wait, you mean I need to bring the card with me to use it?”

Me: *speechless*

(Thankfully, a manager nearby overheard the exchange and jumped in…)

Manager: “Yes, ma’am, you need to bring your card. We can’t use a debit card that you don’t have.”

Customer: “But I have a debit card! Are you telling me I can’t use my card? Why can’t I use it?!”

Manager: “I’m sorry, but you’ll have to come back with your card.”

Customer: “But I have a card!”

(This went on for a good minute or so. The manager ultimately wound up voiding out the second half of the order, telling the customer to come back *with her card* to pay for it. Afterward:)

Customer: “Make sure you don’t put that stuff away! I’ll be back! *leaves*

Next Customer: *shakes her head*

Me: *still speechless*

Bagger: “So… how much you want to bet she doesn’t come back?”

(She didn’t come back. That second half of the order? Mostly frozen food.)

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 58
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 57
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 56

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