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Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

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Reached Your Tea Total, Part 4

| WA, Australia | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(My manager takes an order at the front counter, then comes over to tell me the details.)

Manager: “You see that tea order? They want a couple extra teabags, and a large take away cup.”

(I go to rummage through the cupboard to find the boxes of tea for the rarely-ordered green tea they ask for.)

Customer: *clears throat*

Me: “I’ll just be a moment, sorry!”

Customer: “Tea!”

Me: “Oh, you’re waiting on the tea? Did you want two or three tea bags?”

Customer: “Three.”

Me: “Great, I’m just working on that now.”

(I get the teabags, and the cup, and as I’m moving towards the hot water:)

Customer: “White!”

Me: “No problem.”

(Then, as I am putting the water in it:)

Customer: “White. White!”

Me: “Yes, I’ll put milk in it; don’t worry.”

Customer: “Five sugars. White!”

Me: “You want five sugars?”

Customer: “Yes. And white!”

Me: “All right, just a moment.”

(Before I add the milk, I go to put the sugars in so that they can dissolve in the water properly. After three spoonful’s of sugar, she practically shouts:)

Customer: “That’s enough.”

(I go to stir the sugar in.)

Customer: “White. White!”

Me: “Yes, just a moment.”

(I pour the milk in, stop when she says, and hand it to her. She walks off without a word, and goes and chats perfectly normally to the manager.)

Related:
Reached Your Tea Total, Part 3
Reached Your Tea Total, Part 2
Reached Your Tea Total

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Foiled Their Plans

| Hattiesburg, MS, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money

(I am a customer service manager at a local grocery store. I hear this conversation between one of my cashiers and a customer.)

Coworker: “Okay, sir, four dollars is left after your EBT card. It is for the aluminum foil.”

Customer: “Why didn’t my EBT card pay for that?”

Coworker: “It isn’t food, sir….”

Customer: “Will it work if I get another brand?”

Coworker: “No, sir… it still isn’t food.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Coworker: “Yes…”

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Time To Tap Out

| Canberra, ACT, Australia | At The Checkout, Rude & Risque, Technology

(We’re picking up tickets for a movie and my friend wants to pay using the PayPass system of placing the debit card on the EFTPOS machine.)

Employee: “That comes to [price].”

Friend: “Can I tap that?”

Employee: *stunned silence*

(I and Employee #2 are laughing at this point.)

Friend: “Oh, god… Sorry!”

Employee #1: “That’s okay. You can tap that!” *laughs*

Friend: *grabs popcorn and flees*

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On The Cliff-Edge Of Acceptable Humor

| Austin, TX , USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Popular

Me: “How are you doing today?”

Cashier: “Well, you know, some days are okay and some days you want to jump off a cliff?”

Me: “Oh, honey, don’t do that. Push someone over first, so you have something to land on when you fall.”

Cashier: *grins*

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Hexed The Decimal

| Foley, AL, USA | At The Checkout, Math & Science, Money, Popular

(A woman approaches my counter to purchase a washer. I ring her up with no problems, until we reach the very end.)

Woman: “Hey, did you take off my 10% discount? This is on sale.”

(I’m somewhat baffled, as this is the first time she’s mentioned a discount, but I look anyway.)

Me: “Yes, ma’am. The computer does it automatically.”

Woman: “Okay.”

(The customer then pays with a gift card, three credit cards, and $50 in cash. I finish the transaction and send her on her way. Ten minutes later, an angry gentleman approaches my counter.)

Man: “Hey, girl! You ripped my wife off! There’s no way this cost that much!”

Me: “Sir, I’ll happily look, though I’m fairly sure this is correct.”

Man: “No! It isn’t! You didn’t take off my discount.”

Me: “Okay. Do you want me to break this down, so you can see?”

Man: “Yeah, if you CAN. You cashiers use the computer so much that I doubt you’re capable of basic math!”

(I’m annoyed, but instead of remarking on it, I write down the original price of the item on a piece of paper and, by hand, multiply it by 0.9. )

Man: “Wait! Why are you doing that? It’s a ten-percent discount!”

Me: “Yes, sir. Which means you’re still paying 90%, right?”

Man: “Duh! I’m not stupid! But you multiplied that by a decimal! Not a percent!”

Me: “Well, sir, they’re the same thing. 90% is the same as 0.9.”

Man: “No, it isn’t! God, why does [Store] hire such stupid people?”

Me: “Sir, if you let me finish, I assure you that we’ll know if this receipt is correct.”

(The customer huffs but says nothing. I calculate out the rest of his purchase, with tax, and subtract his payment methods. My result is exactly the same as the one on his receipt.)

Me: “See, sir? I assure you it’s correct.”

Man: “No! I don’t think you know what you’re doing! That math is just insane! I want to speak to a manager!”

(To my surprise, my manager doesn’t understand it either, so I have to repeat myself to him. The customer still claims we’ve cheated him.)

Me: “Sir, I assure you that this is correct.”

Man: “Well, it’s clearly not, if your manager can’t figure it out!”

New Customer: “For God’s sake, I’m a math professor! Let me look at this!”

(The new customer comes around and looks at it.)

New Customer: *to Man* “Well, sir, I regret to inform you that this ‘stupid cashier’ is absolutely correct. If there’s something wrong with the math, it’s definitely yours.”

Man: “Well, I… well, she didn’t explain it right!”

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