Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

Has No Loyalty To Common Sense

| Reno, NV, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Technology

Me: “If that’s all today, your total is [amount].”

Customer #1: *slides card in card reader* “Why does it say card not recognized?”

Me: *looking at card* “Because that is for [Competing Chain]. We can’t take their cards.”

Customer #1: “Well, that’s stupid. You’re both gas stations. You should honor each other’s cards.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I don’t make the rules; I just have to follow them. Do, you have another form of payment?”

Customer #1: “Fine.” *hands over cash*

(I ring up the next customer.)

Me: “If that’s all today, your total is [amount].”

Customer #2: “Oh, I have a loyalty card.”

Me: “Okay, just slide it in the card reader and we’ll see if you have any rewards saved up.”

(Customer #2 slides their card. I see an error message that it isn’t a valid account.)

Me: “Hmm, the card reader didn’t recognize it. Let me try to enter it manually.”

(Customer #2 hands me the card. It is for a grocery chain.)

Me: “Sir, this is a [Grocery Chain] card. We can’t take those here. Do you have a [Our Convenience Store] card?”

Customer #2: “What? But the card says I can use it at the gas station.”

Me: “Yes, at their gas station out front of their store. We can only take our own loyalty cards.”

Customer #2: “Well, that’s misleading.”

(… and this is why I’m incredibly grateful that my last day on that job was last week!)

An Unrewarding Exchange

| Fort Pierce, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(At my job, cashiers are required to go through a spiel for every transaction such as offering extended warranties or store credit cards. The big thing we push is the free store Rewards program. Mostly it’s a points/rewards program, but occasionally it also gets the customer a discount as well on certain items.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, would you like to sign up for our [Rewards Program]?

Customer: “No, you people always want me to sign up for some s***!”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am.”

(We continue with the transaction. As I hit total, the register prompts me that the customer would save five dollars on her sweaters if she signs up for the program, which I am required to inform her.)

Me: “And ma’am, I know you said you didn’t want the rewards program, but if you sign up today at no charge, you would save $5 on your sweaters! Would you be inter—”

Customer: “NO! God-d***! I already said I don’t want your f****** card! God! Don’t you know how to listen?!”

Me: “That’s perfectly fine, ma’am. I am—”

Customer: “Just let me pay and get the h*** out!”

Me: “Okay, your total is [total]. Sorry I couldn’t help you save some money today.”

Customer: “WHAT PART OF ‘NO’ DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND, YOU STUPID B****?!”

Me: “All right. Apologies, ma’am.”

(I finish the transaction and the customer leaves. The woman in line behind her has been very quiet but glaring at the previous woman.)

Me: “Hello, ma’am, how are you? Would you like to sign up for [Rewards Program]?”

Next Customer: “I’ll do it, but just so I can get the discount on these sweaters. And before you ask, no, thank you, I would not like the credit card, but unlike that woman, my mother taught me manners.”

All Scream For Free Ice Cream

| Surrey, England, UK | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(A coworker is working the ice cream counter with me nearby. The customers are a family of four and this happens when she has finished preparing the ice cream. When we ring up an item on our tills, it is stored on a list on the right hand side of the screen that resembles Excel cells. When we complete the payment process the cells’ background changes from white to red. Also, the previous transaction value, cash tendered, and change are at the bottom of the screen.)

Son: “I already paid you, lady! I put my money on the counter and you took it.”

Coworker: “No, I haven’t. I didn’t touch your money and the till clearly shows that I haven’t taken payment for it yet.”

(My coworker turns her till to emphasise this point, since I still have a complete transaction on mine I do the same.)

Father: “How dare you accuse my son of lying? I demand to see your manager!”

(I call the manager down.)

Father: “Your employee is claiming my son didn’t pay for his ice cream!”

Manager: “What did your son order, sir?”

Son: *ice cream scoop cup*

Manager: “I see this order is on the till, but the payment hasn’t been processed yet.”

Father: “Then she must’ve pocketed the note!”

Manager: “I don’t see any pockets on her uniform, but I’ll be happy to check the CCTV for you.” *points to the camera over the ice cream case, pointing over the counter on which my coworker’s till is*

Father: “Forget it! Enjoy the £10, you lying witch!”

(My manager checked the CCTV in the presence of the employee. The son did put the money on the counter but quickly pocketed it when my coworker was scooping the ice cream! We haven’t seen him since!)

The Birth Of Assumption

| East Falmouth, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Bizarre

(A guy comes in, buys his stuff by credit card, as I hand him his bags and receipt:)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

Customer: “What? The h*** did you know?”

Me: “Sir?”

Customer: “The f*** did you know it was my birthday? You see my ID in my wallet or something?”

Me: “Uh… sir? All I said was have a nice day.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “…”

Customer: “Not ‘Happy Birthday?'”

Me: *trying VERY hard not to smirk* “…No.”

Customer: “Well, this day’s off to a good start…”

Me: *smiling sympathetically* “Have a nice day, sir. And Happy Birthday.”

The Cigarettes Are All Smoke And Mirrors

| Robeline, LA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(A customer comes up to the counter and is looking at the cigarette display over my shoulder.)

Customer: “Do you have any [Brand] menthols?”

(I look over my shoulder at that exact brand/flavor then give the customer a sidelong glance. I usually bite my tongue in this sort of situation but I’ve had a long day and can’t resist.)

Me: *grin* “Nope, sorry, those are a figment of your imagination.”

Customer: *pauses then laughs* “I set myself up for that, didn’t I?”