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Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

Can’t Read The Minds Of The Mindless

| Rockwall, TX, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I work at a steakhouse where we think and act guest first. There are never customers only guests.)

Guest: *talking on phone*

Guest’s Wife: “He’ll take a sweet tea.” *rattles off the rest of the drink order*

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

Guest: “Why didn’t you ask me what I wanted to drink?”

Me: “I didn’t want to interrupt your phone call, sir. Can I go ahead and get your order for you?”

Guest: *looks at me strangely for a few moments*

Guest’s Wife: “Did you get all that, sweetheart?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, you didn’t actually say anything. What can I get you?”

Guest: “Well, you should know. I was thinking it very loudly.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, could you please repeat what you would like to eat?”

(The guest tells me and as I walk away loudly says to his wife:)

Guest: “This is the worst customer service I’ve ever had! What kind of waitress can’t just tell what I’m thinking?!”

Dealing With A Smoking Gun

| CT, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(I work at a grocery store at the courtesy desk. Our store is relatively new and doesn’t sell cigarettes, unlike most others of the same chain. One day a woman approaches the desk.)

Me: “Hello. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, can I have a carton of Marlboro Lights?”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, ma’am. This [Store] does not sell cigarettes.”

Customer: *shocked and annoyed* “What? Why not?!”

Me: “The owner made the decision not to sell them before he opened this store.”

Customer: “I can’t believe this. That’s just UN-AMERICAN!”

(Her husband who was nearby hears her and walks up.)

Customer’s Husband: Hmm? What’s the matter?

Customer: “This store doesn’t sell cigarettes! Have you ever heard of that before?! It’s just un-American!”

Me: “I’m sorry for the inconvenience. There is a store in the plaza that sells cigarettes just outside here.”

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to! It’s just un-American to not sell cigarettes!”

(The customer storms off leaving me and her husband to just stare in confusion.)

Me: “Have a nice day, sir.”

Customer’s Husband: “Yeah, not when I’m out shopping with her!”

That’s One For The Books

| USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Books & Reading

(A customer drives up to the store, gets out, comes in, and walks directly up to the counter without looking at a single book or item for sale. Before I can even welcome him…)

Customer: “You are going to lose your job.”

Me: *shocked* “I am?”

Customer: “No one likes books anymore. Your store is going to shut down and you’ll be out of a job.”

(He turned around, walked out without looking at a single item, jumped in his car, and left.)