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Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

Gun Control Out Of Control

| IN, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal & Illegal, Money

(Today is the day before Thanksgiving. I went to a grocery store to grab a couple of last minute supplies and the card reader won’t scan my really old debit card. I reach into my wallet and go to hand the cashier cash when she flinches and ducks behind the counter.)

Me: “Hello, you okay down there?”

Cashier: “Oh, sorry, I thought you were pointing a gun at me.”

Me: “Why on earth would I do that?”

Cashier: “Because your card was declined.”

Me: “…”

Cashier: “Open carry.”

Me: “People really pull guns on you over ten bucks worth of groceries?”

Cashier: “Yeah, they want to make sure our freedom to be an a**-hole is protected, I guess.”

(I paid for my groceries and spoke to her manager about getting her a gift card. Grocery stores shouldn’t be war zones. Leave your guns at home!)

Thank You For Coming In But Not Really

| GA, USA | At The Checkout, Holidays

(Our store, unlike our competitors, is open every day but Christmas. It is Thanksgiving. I’m the bagger.)

Customer: “What are you doing open on Thanksgiving?”

Me: “Well, this store stays open for normal hours every day but Christmas.”

Customer: “That’s not good; you should be with your family.”

(We have been keeping track of how many people say this, something that frustrates us as we would LOVE to be home.)

Me: “Well, as long as it is profitable to be open today, the store is open.”

Customer: “That’s too bad; its a shame they make you work today.”

Me: *to the cashier, after customer leaves* “I think my comment about the profitable was too subtle. Don’t these people realize we are only open because they come to buy things?”

(That day we counted around 200 people saying it was a shame we were working on Thanksgiving.)

That’s How You Wish The Cookie Crumbled

| Acton, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers

(I am on checkout.)

Customer: *notices the shopping carts full of items other customers didn’t want* “What are all those?”

Me: “These are things other people decided they didn’t want.”

Customer: *looks confused* “That’s strange.”

Me: “Well, it’s better that they bring them up here for us to put away then leave them on a random place on the shelf.”

Customer: *looks confused and surprised* “Why would people do that? Why not just put it back where they found it.”

Me: “They’re lazy? Or they can’t find where it goes.”

Customer: *quietly looks confused*

Me: “Have you ever worked retail?”

Customer: “No, never.”

Me: “…Huh. Normally it’s only people who’ve worked retail that do that, because they know what it’s like.” *I finish bagging their stuff and give them their receipt* “Here you go. Have a good holiday.”

Customer: “Thank you. You, too.”

Me: *to myself* “We need something like cookies we can give out to good customers.”