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Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

All Scream For Free Ice Cream

| Surrey, England, UK | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(A coworker is working the ice cream counter with me nearby. The customers are a family of four and this happens when she has finished preparing the ice cream. When we ring up an item on our tills, it is stored on a list on the right hand side of the screen that resembles Excel cells. When we complete the payment process the cells’ background changes from white to red. Also, the previous transaction value, cash tendered, and change are at the bottom of the screen.)

Son: “I already paid you, lady! I put my money on the counter and you took it.”

Coworker: “No, I haven’t. I didn’t touch your money and the till clearly shows that I haven’t taken payment for it yet.”

(My coworker turns her till to emphasise this point, since I still have a complete transaction on mine I do the same.)

Father: “How dare you accuse my son of lying? I demand to see your manager!”

(I call the manager down.)

Father: “Your employee is claiming my son didn’t pay for his ice cream!”

Manager: “What did your son order, sir?”

Son: *ice cream scoop cup*

Manager: “I see this order is on the till, but the payment hasn’t been processed yet.”

Father: “Then she must’ve pocketed the note!”

Manager: “I don’t see any pockets on her uniform, but I’ll be happy to check the CCTV for you.” *points to the camera over the ice cream case, pointing over the counter on which my coworker’s till is*

Father: “Forget it! Enjoy the £10, you lying witch!”

(My manager checked the CCTV in the presence of the employee. The son did put the money on the counter but quickly pocketed it when my coworker was scooping the ice cream! We haven’t seen him since!)

The Birth Of Assumption

| East Falmouth, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Bizarre

(A guy comes in, buys his stuff by credit card, as I hand him his bags and receipt:)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

Customer: “What? The h*** did you know?”

Me: “Sir?”

Customer: “The f*** did you know it was my birthday? You see my ID in my wallet or something?”

Me: “Uh… sir? All I said was have a nice day.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “…”

Customer: “Not ‘Happy Birthday?'”

Me: *trying VERY hard not to smirk* “…No.”

Customer: “Well, this day’s off to a good start…”

Me: *smiling sympathetically* “Have a nice day, sir. And Happy Birthday.”

The Cigarettes Are All Smoke And Mirrors

| Robeline, LA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(A customer comes up to the counter and is looking at the cigarette display over my shoulder.)

Customer: “Do you have any [Brand] menthols?”

(I look over my shoulder at that exact brand/flavor then give the customer a sidelong glance. I usually bite my tongue in this sort of situation but I’ve had a long day and can’t resist.)

Me: *grin* “Nope, sorry, those are a figment of your imagination.”

Customer: *pauses then laughs* “I set myself up for that, didn’t I?”