Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Cash Back Attack

| Australia | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Technology

Me: “Hello, just letting you know that our EFTPOS is currently unavailable. Will you be able to pay by cash?”

Customer: “Yeah, no problem.”

(Serves groceries:)

Customer: “May I please have cash out?”

Me: “Umm… What? No, our EFTPOS is down.”

Customer: “Oh, but I have my Mastercard.”

Sales End, But Stupidity Is Forever

| Canada | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

(I work at a clothing store where we had a sale that ended a couple of weeks prior to this day. Customer comes to the register and throws the blouse on the counter. She starts to tell me about her purchase the week we had the sale, and tells me she got a price adjustment, because she bought a blouse just a couple days prior to the sale.)

Customer: “I want to pay the sale price for this.”

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “This was cheaper a couple of weeks ago. So, I want to pay that price.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but our sale is over.”

Customer: “You don’t get it. I WANT to buy a new blouse and I WANT pay the sale price.”

Me: “I understand. Like you mentioned before, you got a price adjustment for the prior blouse you bought, but the sale is now over.”

Customer: “No, you don’t understand. I don’t want to pay the regular price. I want the sale price. I want to buy this new blouse for the sale price.”

Me: “I understand, but when our sales are over, the clothing goes back to our regular price. Therefore, I cannot grant you a sale price if the sale is over. As you told me before, you were able to get a price adjustment for the same blouse you bought, but if you want to purchase a new blouse, it must be paid in full price, because the sale is now over. You’re more than welcome to give us a call next week and check with us for any sales, or if this blouse happens to go on sale again, you may get the price adjusted.”

Customer: “No, you REALLY don’t get it. I don’t understand why you can’t give me the sale price. But, I’ll just pay for it.”

The Stupid Just Radiates Off Of Him

| Kamloops, BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I am an 18-year-old student working at a local grocery store chain, normally as a cashier but occasionally I’m put in the meat & seafood department to clean up at the end of the day. This happens to be one of those days. The phone rings, and I pick it up.)

Me: “Hello, thank you for calling [Store]’s meat and seafood department. This is [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, uh, where do you get your tuna from?”

Me: “It’s fished off the coast of BC, close to Vancouver.”

Customer: “Yeah, well I’m calling because my wife saw something on Facebook that said that the tuna there is full of radiation.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “There was a post on Facebook that said your tuna was irradiated.”

(I’m trying as hard as I can not to laugh.)

Me: “I can assure you, there is no radiation poisoning in our tuna.”

Customer: “I don’t know. The post was really detailed.”

Me: “Well, I wouldn’t believe everything I read on Facebook, but I can get a manager for you if that helps.”

(I go and get my manager, who laughs as soon as he hears the situation. He talks to the customer for a bit, eventually coming to a conclusion.)

Manager: “Radiation, oh man. People believe this s***?”

Refuses To Take Sides

| TX, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

Customer: “Hi, I’d like the #7 combo, please.”

Me: “All right, and for your side and drink?”

Customer: “Medium.”

Me: “What would you like them to be?”

Customer: “Diet.”

Me: “Okay, we have 389,929 different drink combinations. Which one, do you want?”

Customer: “Oh, Diet [Soda].”

Me: “Okay, and for your side?”

Customer: “Medium.”

Me: “…”

Trying To Backtrack The Conversation

| Brisbane, QLD, Australia | Extra Stupid, Transportation

(During peak hour traffic, it’s very slow on the highway, which also slows the number of cars trying to get out of our car park as our centre is right alongside the highway. There’s often a long queue of cars trying to leave the carpark.)

Customer: “Excuse me, how do I get back onto the highway?”

Me: “The exit is that way.” *points*

Customer: “Do I have to get behind that long line of cars?”

Me: “Yes, there’s only one exit.”

Customer: “Where’s the back way?”

Me: “There is no back way. That’s the only exit.”

Customer: “But there’s too many cars there! How do I avoid them?”

Me: “You don’t. There’s one exit. That’s why all the cars are lined up there.”

Customer: “…So, there’s no back way?”