Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

H2-Slow, Part 12

| TX, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(A customer and her daughter walk in to the store. The daughter has a water damaged phone due to her sweating so much through her pants, where her phone was in her pocket.)

Me: “I’m afraid you will have to take it to a corporate location to get it repaired or replaced.

Mother: *coming to the sudden realization that liquid might not be the best thing for a phone* “So water is bad for phones, right?”

Me: “Yes.”

Mother: “So if I use my phone to play my music in the shower, will that hurt it?”

Me: “Yes, it’s water.

Mother: “What if I put my phone in a bag?” *pause* “Oh, well, that won’t work. I have to plug my headphones in…”

Related:
H2Slow, Part 11
H2Slow, Part 10
H2Slow, Part 9

Getting Cheesed Off With The Salad

| The Netherlands | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

Customer: “Excuse me, what is the difference between the chicken salad and the cheese salad?”

Me: “Well… the chicken salad comes with chicken, and the cheese salad comes with cheese.”

Customer: “I see. You should really put that on the menu, you know, it’s very confusing.”

Can’t See The Gravity Of The Situation

| NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science

(Part of my duties as an optician is fitting and adjusting eyeglass frames. One day, a woman comes in to get her frames adjusted. I look everything over and the fit looks fine.)

Me: “What problem are you having with the fit?”

Customer: “Gravity is pulling down on one side more than the other and making the frames crooked.”

If I Tell You, Will You Go Away?

, | VA, USA | Extra Stupid, Language & Words

(I am sitting behind an older couple at a restaurant/bar. There is a sign on the wall that says “I.I.T.Y.W.Y.B.M.A.D”, an acronym that says “If I tell you, will you buy me a drink?”. The joke is that people are supposed to ask what it stands for, followed by the waitress saying “If I tell you, will you buy me a drink?”. The woman, unaware of the joke, flags down the waitress.)

Woman: “Excuse me. What does that stand for?”

Waitress: “If I tell you, will you buy me a drink?”

Woman: “No.”

Waitress: “…”

Man: “It’s a joke. That is the acronym.”

Woman: “What?”

Man: “’I.I.T.Y.W.Y.B.M.A.D’ is an acronym for ‘If I tell you will you buy me a drink?’.”

Woman: “I don’t get it.”

It’s Been A Long Day Exactly

| London, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging, Time

(I’m sitting on reception when two ladies come to check in. I check them in and everything is fine until I start telling them the hotel information.)

Me: “The bar is open 24 hours for hotel guests.”

Guest #1: *looks at me shocked…* “Only 24 hours? But we are here four nights.”

Me: *looking at her dumbfounded and speechless*

Guest #2: “Don’t… don’t worry about her… We had a long trip… We’ll be going up to our room now.”

Page 6/379First...45678...Last