Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!


The Tip Of The Stupidity Ice-Berg

| Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(A customer has just ordered an iced coffee and sat down. Once the barista finishes making the drink, I bring it over to the customer.)

Me: “Here’s your iced coffee, sir.”

Customer: “What? Oh no. No, no, this isn’t what I wanted. No, this won’t do at all!”

Me: “Sorry, sir, is this not what you ordered?”

Customer: “Well, I ordered an iced coffee.”

Me: “Yes…”

Customer: “There’s ice cubes in it.”

Me: “Yes, sir…?”

Customer: “Well, I didn’t realise there would be ice in it.”


Not Very Closed Minded, Part 21

, | NY, USA | Extra Stupid

(I work at a well-known coffee chain and we are moving from our current store down the road to a larger building. We have been advertising the move for months and told all our customers that we will be closing for one day to move all of our machines, etc. The front door is locked and has multiple signs on it staying that we are closed. In order for us to move machines out easily the side entrance is held open by a garbage can. All the machines and merchandise left in the store are scattered all over the dining area and counters.)

Customer: *approaches front door and pulls on it vigorously multiple times before realizing it is locked and walking around to the side entrance* “Can I have a medium iced coffee with extra cream?”

Manager: “I’m sorry, sir, we are closed today. We are in the middle of moving.” *waves arms around pointing to all the machines and merchandise*

Customer: “So I can’t have my coffee?”

Manager: “No, sir, we are closed and we do not have any coffee made or any machines to brew it.”

Customer: “Well, why doesn’t it say that you are closed anywhere?”

Manager: “With all due respect, sir, there are signs all over the front door and the machines and merchandise are scattered throughout the store.”

Customer: “Oh! I thought that meant only the front door was closed. Have a nice day!”

(We all stood there baffled and still laugh about it to this day! Unfortunately he wasn’t the only customer to come in asking for coffee!)


Not Very Closed Minded, Part 20

Not Very Closed Minded, Part 19

Not Very Closed Minded, Part 18


Tapping Into The Wrong Solution

ON, Canada | Extra Stupid

(The restaurant I work in is very small, and we do not have a lot of technology people seem to expect – such as a computer to remember what they ordered last time. Our debit/credit machine is dial-up, and does not have a tap option. There is no ‘tap’ icon or logo, and the first screen asks customers to “insert chip or swipe,” yet the following transaction happens far too often.)

Me: *handing terminal to customer* “Chip goes down at the bottom there.”

Customer: *taps card directly onto the “please insert chip” screen, approximately where a “tap” icon is NOT, several times* “Your tap’s not working.”

Me: “No, sir, our tap does not exist.”


Starved Of Useful Information

| TN, USA | Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals

(I’m the manager at a pet store, and I’ve always had a soft spot for reptiles. My favorites are leopard geckos, so I’m always eager to give advice to customers interested in them. One day I’m bagging crickets for a customer who has leopard geckos at home, and we start a conversation about them.)

Customer: “Yeah, for some reason, their appetites increase during the summer.”

Me: “That’s normal. The warmer temperatures make them more active, so they’re going to eat more.”

Customer: “I just don’t know what’s going on. My leopard geckos always act like they’re starving!”

Me: “Oh? How often do you feed them?”

Customer: “Once a month.”

Me: *wondering if maybe I misheard and she has a snake* “What type of animal did you say you have again?”

Customer: *annoyed* “Lizard!”

Me: “But what type of lizard?”

Customer: “Gecko? Leopard gecko.”

Me: “Ma’am, leopard geckos need to eat every other day! Three times a week at the bare minimum!”

Customer: “That’s not true! More than once a month will kill them.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’ve had leopard geckos since I was in middle school. They’re my favorite animal in this building. You NEED to feed them more than once a month, or they WILL starve.”

Customer: *huffy and offended* “Well, I’ve had leopard geckos for years, so I know what I’m doing.”

(I later found out that she’d complained to the cashier about how rude “the cricket girl” was and had threatened to call the manager. Since I WAS the manager, a part of me wishes she had!)


That’s One For The Log

, | PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I work in a call center for a financial institution; I receive some pretty interesting phone calls. I’m paranoid about submitting too many and getting fired, but I thought this small one might be funny.)

Me: “Thank you for calling customer service. [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Caller: *says immediately without pulling up his account information* “I’m looking at my login ID screen.”

Me: *silence to make sure I don’t interrupt him, expecting to hear more about the problem* “Okay. How may I help you?”

Caller: “I can’t log in.”

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