Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Common Sense Does Not Register

| IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(I’m working the service desk when a guy comes up with a sheet from a registry.)

Customer: “This is my daughter’s registry. We tried to go online to delete this item –” *points to an item* “– but it won’t let us. Can you do that for me?”

Me: “Unfortunately not. She would have to go in and do it herself. And the item has been purchased?”

Customer: “Yeah, we bought it.” *sighs in frustration* “There’s a flaw in the system!”

Me: “Did you have the cashier scan this when you purchased it?”

Customer: “Well, we purchased it at a different store.”

Me: “Did you purchase it at a different location or did you get it at a different store altogether?”

Customer: “A different store altogether. So you’re saying you won’t take it off? This is a flaw in the system.”

Me: “Sir… we cannot take it off if you didn’t purchase it at our store. We cannot do anything with it on our end. We have NO access to people’s accounts. If you purchase it in our store or online, we can fix it then.”

Customer: “Why not? So if I buy it here, take it off, and return it, will that take it off the registry? Then no one else can buy it for her.”

Me: “No, because once you return it, it returns back to the registry.”

Customer: “Well, that’s a flaw they should fix. I get that they want to keep the business in the store, but I bought it; I should be able to take it off the registry!”

Me: *fed up after having a long night* “It’s. Not. A. Flaw. We can’t have it so anyone can go in and change things. If that were true, then things could be taken off EVEN IF THEY WEREN’T PURCHASED!”

(The man then walks out, still mumbling about how there’s a flaw in our registry system. Sadly, this was not the first time someone has asked me to take something off a registry that they did not buy in our store.)

A Surge Of Dumbness

| MO, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Popular, Technology

(I work for a copier/printer repair company. We make one brand, but also work on others. A customer with one of the ‘other’ brands at a high school had a problem that had been going on for weeks; even the factory support was baffled. After yet another attempt, another teacher comes into the room.)

Teacher #2: “Your printer still isn’t fixed yet?”

Teacher #1: “No, these guys have no clue in how to fix things, I guess.”

Me: *fumes silently, with 15+ years of experience in the field while looking through yet another manual for something I haven’t tried yet*

Teacher #2: “Just where did you get that printer anyway?”

Teacher #1: “Oh, it was in the dumpster; the IT guys had thrown it out because it’d been hit in a power surge.”

Me: “Uhm, what did you say?”

Teacher #1: “Oh, yeah, I mean it looks brand new, so it should be good, right?””

Me: “…I’m sorry. I don’t think I can fix this. Here’s your bill.”

Confusion Brewing

, | Montreal, QC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Popular

(I work in a food delivery call center as a team leader on evening shift when one of the agents on my team comes to tell me he has a lady on the line who would like to “submit a comment.” I ask him to send her to me so I can talk with her.)

Me: “Good evening, madam. My name is [My Name]. How could I be of service tonight?”

Caller: “Good evening, sir. I would like to submit a comment, but it’s not a complaint, though.”

Me: “Oh, no problem, you can go on. I will note it down and send it to our HQ without any problem.”

Caller: “I received a little tea bag with every order I made with you. I find the attention very sweet, however every time I infused it after eating, the taste is a little weird. Maybe you should verify your expiry date.”

(I know that the restaurant hasn’t been selling tea for years, so I ask the lady for more detail.)

Caller: “Well you know it’s in a square-shaped little bag and it seems to be your house brand because it has your emblem on it.”

(That’s when I realised she had been drinking infused wet napkins.)

A Sad Signs Of The Times

| New Berlin, WI, USA | Extra Stupid

(About two years ago, we switched over to electronic tickets. Whenever a guest plays a game and wins tickets, our system automatically records that their card gets that many tickets, which we scan and subtract appropriately in the prize room. Despite this becoming relatively common among other arcades, the numerous signs we post, and that our cashiers routinely inform guests about the system, we still get asked about it daily. On this day, a boy and his little sister approach me.)

Guest: “Hi, I have a question.”

Me: *already bracing myself for practically the only question I ever get* “Sure, what’s up?”

Guest: “Well, my sister played [Game]. It said she won four tickets, but nothing came out.”

Me: “That’s because we don’t give out physical tickets anymore. It’s all tracked on your game card.”

Guest: “Ooooh! You guys should probably put up a sign or something.”

Me: “Actually, we have many signs, all around the room.”

(The boy hangs his head in defeat, clearly acknowledging his inattentiveness.)

Me: “You see how effective signs are.”

Not Quite Floating Their Boat

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Popular

(The very first customer of my shift comes in.)

Customer: “Hey, I would like a [Soda], please.”

Me: “Yeah, sure. Would you like ice?”

Customer: “Yeah, yeah, sure. Only a small amount though.”

Me: “All right, then, here you go. That’s $1.50.”

(I hand him the Soda and he gives me the money.)

Customer: *right before he leaves* “Hey, what’s this?”

Me: “What’s what?”

Customer: “I said not to add too much ice and here, see? It’s full of it!”

Me: “Sir, I’m pretty sure that ice floats.”

Customer: “Liar! Here, I’ll show!”

(The customer pokes at the ice and the ice bobs up and down. He pokes it for three minutes.)

Manager: *randomly coming out of nowhere* “Sir, ice floats.”

Customer: “Oh, okay, then. Bye.”

Me: “…”

(He also forgot to take the lid, the straw, and his car keys.)

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