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Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Your Solution Is The Bomb

| SC, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

Coworker: “Thank you for calling technical support, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I think my tablet is about to explode!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, did you just say explode?”

Customer: “Yes! I think there’s a bomb in it! I was watching a video, and all of a sudden the video stopped and it started making this awful noise! It was a bomb, I’m sure of it! I threw it out in the front yard and I’ve already called the police to send the bomb squad!”

Coworker: *unable to hide the fact that he’s now laughing* “You… you called the bomb squad?!”

Customer: “Yes! I wasn’t sure if I should throw it outside or into the toilet!”

Coworker: “No! You don’t want to throw it into the toilet! Is the tablet still in the yard?”

Customer: “Of course! The bomb squad hasn’t come yet!”

Coworker: “Can you go outside and grab the tablet for me? I promise it won’t blow up. It’s just frozen. We can fix it.”

Customer: “I don’t know… Okay, I guess. If you’re sure.”

(There is the sound of a frozen tablet glitching on a video gets loud as she goes outside.)

Customer: “See! You can hear it! It’s going to explode!”

Coworker: *struggling not to laugh directly at the customer* “No, ma’am, I assure you it’s not. Go ahead and pick it up and press the power button for me, then hold it down.”

Customer:  “It turned off! The screen is off! It’s going to blow!”

Coworker: “No, ma’am, we just turned it off. Go ahead and turn it back on for me again?”

Customer: “Oh… now it’s working. Thanks!” *click*

Not Very Closed Minded, Part 5

| England, UK | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(I work on Sundays; in the UK, the law states our shop can only be open for six hours. We close at half past four, but the staff stay until 5 pm. It’s quarter to 5, and I notice a woman in our car park, looking at the items we have outside. She looks at the door, and I think she’s seen the sign that says our opening times, so don’t shoo her away until I notice her picking some items up, and moves towards the door, only to find it locked. She rattles the door.)

Me: “We’re closed, sorry!”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “We close at half past four!”

Customer: “What?”

Me & Manager: “We’re closed!”

Customer: *shouting to her little boy* “[Name]! Get here. They’re closed!”

(Thinking that’s the end of it, we go back to what we were doing. Suddenly she bangs on the door.)

Customer: “…does this mean I can’t buy anything?”

Related:
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 4
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 3

Comic: The Only Thing She Skipped Was Kwanzaa

| New York, NY, USA | At The Checkout, Comics, Extra Stupid, Holidays, Religion