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Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Misunderstanding Free Trade

| MI, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

Customer: “I want a cup of 2% milk with four pumps of chocolate in it.”

Me: “What size would you like?”

Customer: “The size that’s free.”

Me: *thinking I misheard, or maybe she’s joking* “I’m sorry, what?”

Customer: “Whatever size is free! I want that size!”

Me: “Um, we don’t have a ‘free cup of chocolate milk’ in any size.”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me! I know that’s why you have the milk out on the condiment bar! But I want 2%, not creamer!”

Me: “That’s for customers to put in their coffee. It’s not so you can make free cups of chocolate milk.”

(It took me almost 10 minutes to convince her I wasn’t going to make her a free cup of chocolate milk.)

Confused To The Nines

| PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Time

Me: *answering phone* “Hello, thank you for calling [Store]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: *clearly a young teenage guy* “Uh…yeah, I was just wondering what time you are open until today.”

(Note, it is currently 9:30 am.)

Me: “We are open until nine today.”

Customer: “Nine in the morning or, like, nine?”

Someone In The Background: “Dude! Did you seriously just ask that?”

Me: *stifling laughter* “Nine at night, sir.”

Customer: “Oh, okay…”

Me: “Was there anything else I can help you with?”

Customer: “No… no… that’s all.”

Failed With Flying Colors

| Wollongong, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(Our jewellery cabinet is sorted into a colour display with each shelf being solely dedicated to one colour. A customer beckons me over.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I’d like to look at the turquoise jewellery please.”

Me: “Of course, which ones would you like to see?”

Customer: *pointing at the turquoise shelf* “The turquoise ones.”

Me: “Which ones in particular?”

Customer: *pointing again* “The turquoise jewellery.”

Me: “Ma’am, all of the jewellery on that shelf is turquoise. I’m finding it hard to see which one in particular you’re looking at. Would you be able to describe it for me?”

Customer: “Oh, of course they are!”

(She bends towards the shelf, squints at it, and jabs the glass with her finger.)

Customer: “The turquoise one!”

Me: “…”

(Ten minutes later we figured it out.)