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Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Remember, Remember, The Fifth Of October

| Saratoga, NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

(It is about a half hour from closing when the phone rings. If you want to pay for delivery with a card, you have to do it over the phone.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Restaurant]. This is [My Name]. Will this be for pickup or delivery?”

Customer: “Delivery, please.”

(We go through the normal ordering process of phone number, address, what she actually wants; when we get to the payment.)

Customer: “Yeah, I like, want to charge it.”

Me: “Okay, I just need your card number whenever you’re ready.”

Customer: “It’s [Number].”

Me: “Expiration date?”

Customer: “October 2014.”

Me: “I’m sorry, it’s coming up declined. Let’s try the number again.”

Customer: *in a huff* “Okaaay, it’s 4… 2… 3…”

(She’s saying each number slowly and dramatically, as if I processed it wrong because I’m stupid. I’m a bit disgruntled until the next part happens.)

Me: “And for the expiration, I have ten-fourteen?”

Customer: “No, October. Like, eleven-fourteen.”

Me: “Okay, I think I see the problem here. You’re all set and it’ll be about forty minutes. Have a great night.”

Give It More Than Half A Thought

| Aberystwyth, Wales, UK | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Math & Science

(I work in a small corner shop in my university town. I was serving behind the till when a man came up with bin bags, that I wasn’t aware were on a special offer until I scanned them through the till. The following conversation took place when I realised this.)

Me: “Oh, sir, these bin bags are two for £1.20. Would you like to take another?’

Customer: “No. You see, I need double strength bags for heavy duty waste, so I only buy ten, because if I bought twenty they’d only be half strength.”

Wipe And Gripe

| Kansas City, MO, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I am on my way to the bathroom when a student stops me. She’s on one of our computers. All of our computers are available to the public.)

Student: “Hey! Where’s my stuff!?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Student: “I saved my stuff on here and it’s gone!”

Me: *shocked* “Ma’am, that’s a public computer. They wipe them fairly often.”

Student: “Other people’s stuff is on it and mine isn’t! I want my stuff!”

Me: *attempts to see if I can find her ‘stuff’*

Student: “I had my resume on here and everything!”

Me: “As I said, ma’am, these are public computers. Even if it hadn’t been wiped, any person can come in and delete files that are saved on here.”

Student: “Well, that’s just stupid!”