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Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Blisteringly Stupid Question

| Orlando, FL, USA | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Tourists/Travel

Driver: *after the fill-up* “Can I ask you a question?”

Me: “Sure.”

Driver: “It’s about my husband. We were on the beach today and he got sunburned.”

Me: “Uh-huh.”

Driver: “What should I do to make him feel better?”

Me: “Well, aloe lotions are good. If it’s really painful, though, use lidocaine.”

Driver: “But he’s got blisters.”

Me: “Get him to the hospital! He’s got second-degree burns!”

Driver: “Oh, I couldn’t do that. He hates hospitals.”

Me: *stunned silence*

Avoiding The Meat Of The Problem

| UK | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I work at a customer service desk in a large supermarket.)

Me: “How can I help?”

Customer: “I want a refund for this frozen chicken!”

Me: “Okay, so what seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “I put it in the oven for a whole hour and it’s still pink inside!”

Me: “Um, okay. I would suggest putting it in the oven for longer then, ma’am.”

Customer: “Are you calling me stupid?!”

Me: “No, I’m just suggesting that it is pink because it’s not cooked properly.”

Customer: “Just because I’m not a chicken cooking expert like you!”

Me: “I’ve been vegetarian for 13 years, ma’am…”

Not On Top Of Modern Technology

| MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(An older gentleman approaches me in my department.)

Me: “Hello, sir. What can I help you find?”

Customer: “You advertised a set of mixing bowls on sale for $19.99. Where are they?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I’m not sure which ones you’re talking about. Did you see them in the most recent flyer?”

Customer: “Yes.”

(I start looking through our flyer, searching for the bowls in question. After a few minutes, I’m still not seeing anything, and the customer is becoming agitated.)

Customer: “They were right at the top on the website!”

Me: “Oh! So they weren’t in a flyer? Let me pull up the site. Did you search for them with any particular keywords?”

Customer: “No! I told you, they were just at the top!”

Me: “Sir, the top of what?”

Customer: “The top of the Internet! I don’t see what is so hard about this!”

(The customer didn’t see anything wrong with telling me to check the first page of “the Internet” for an item he knew no details about. I found him the mixing bowls, no thanks to him.)