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Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Put Yourself In Her Wet Shoes

| UK | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(On this particular day it has been raining really heavily. Unfortunately, the shoes I am wearing have holes in them. Thankfully, my house is only over the road. I text my mum asking her to bring me a spare set of socks to wear. This exchange happens just after my mum drops off my socks. Customer #1 comes to my till as I pull off my first sock.)

Me: *sitting on a stool changing my socks* “I’ll be right with you. I just need to change my socks.”

Customer #1: “Can’t you get dressed properly before starting work? Seriously, this is unacceptable behaviour.”

Me: “Sir, I apologise. I was dressed before I left but the soles of my shoes have holes in them so my socks got wet.  I am changing them as I cannot work with wet socks.”

(Customer #2 has walked over as I say this.)

Customer #1: “What do you mean your feet got wet? There are no puddles in this store. You’re just lazy.”

(I finish changing and start to scan his shopping as he yells about how unacceptable my behaviour is and that I’m lazy. Customer #2 taps the other customer on the shoulder.)

Customer #2: “I was just wondering did you notice how wet it was outside?”

Customer #1: *rolls eyes* “Of course, it’s raining. It would be wet outside.”

Customer #2: “That’s why this young lady had to change her socks. She already explained that her shoes have holes. Or did you think she lives in the shop?”

Customer #1: *goes bright red and doesn’t say anything else*

(I smiled at the second customer and thanked him for being so helpful.)

Not So (Do)Nuts About Burgers

| Medicine Hat, AB, Canada | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I work at a burger place, next to a coffee and doughnut shop. Occasionally we get people in drive-thru that get the places mixed up, but both drive-thrus are close to each other, A customer walks in, past three big pictures of hamburgers, and the restaurant name is posted several times.)

Customer: *looking at the menu* “Can I get an iced capp, please?”

Me: “I’m sorry; we don’t have those.”

Customer: “Oh. The machine’s broken?”

Me: “No. We’ve never had them.”

Customer: “Yes, you do. I had one last week.”

Me: “No. None of the [Restaurant] have ever had them.”

Customer: *looks around* “Oh. This isn’t [Donut Shop]. You should have told me.”

Me: “I assumed with the pictures of hamburgers all over, and lack of donuts you knew where you where.”

Customer: *looks around again, and leaves embarrassed*

O, Canaduh, Part 3

| Montreal, QC, Canada | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Technology

(I am working as cashier with a very long line of customers, on a busy day in downtown Montreal.)

Customer: ”I’m from the US and I’m buying this for my son. He’ll be so happy! Can you gift wrap it?”

Me: ”Absolutely, ma’am. You can insert your card to pay.”’

Interac Machine: ”Beeeep!”

Me: ”Sorry, ma’am, the transaction was cancelled. Can you please insert your card again?”

Interact Machine: ”Beeep!”

Me: ”Sorry, ma’am, I don’t know what is going on. I’m going to do the transaction on the other machine over there.” *customers in line are getting a little nervous*

Customer: ”Well, I don’t understand. It cancels every time I choose CAN for Canadian dollars ”

Me: ”Ma’am… CAN stands for cancel…”

Customer: ”Oh, that’s why! I never would have guessed!”

Related:
O, Canaduh, Part 2
O, Canaduh

Enough Bong For Your Buck

, | Selkirk, MB, Canada | Criminal & Illegal, Extra Stupid

(I am working in the drive-thru section of our store. My coworker is taking the order as the customer is at the speaker box.)

Coworker: “Thank you for choosing [Restaurant]. [Coworker] speaking. How may I help you?”

Customer: “I’ll take a glass of bong water!”

Coworker: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Haha, just give me a cup of water.”

Coworker: “Okay… anything else?”

Customer: “Nope.”

Coworker: “Okay, please drive to the window.”

(At the window…)

Coworker: *gives customer the cup of water*

(The customer drives into the parking lot.)

Coworker: *to me* “That guy had a bong right on his lap. He and his buddies in the car are seriously about to go do drugs in the parking lot.”

Me: “I’m astounded at how stupid they are. Let’s call the police.”

(We called the police, and they came within a few minutes. They searched the car and drove the impaired guys home. We don’t know any details about how they were charged. When my coworker was taking out the garbage, he overheard the guy complaining because he would have to go get more drugs now.)

Zero Chance Of Success

| ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Language & Words, Technology

(If someone’s phone number area code is 905, it is commonly said as ‘nine-oh-five’ instead of ‘nine-zero-five.’ Everyone who has ever sent a letter in Canada, also knows that Postal Codes are always Letter-Number-Letter, Number-Letter-Number. I am trying to do an online order for a customer, who has been very difficult throughout the entire transaction. I am taking his shipping information down.)

Me: “Okay, and what’s your postal code?”

Customer: “P, ‘oh,’ E, 5, Y ‘oh.'”

(I type it in and ask for the rest of his info, but the computer tells me the postal code is wrong.)

Me: “Hmm, that’s weird, it’s telling me the postal code is incorrect. Maybe I typed it in wrong. Can you repeat it to me, please?”

Customer: “P, ‘oh,’ E, 5, Y ‘oh.'”

(I type in P0E 5Y0.)

Me: “No, it still says it’s wrong. Maybe it doesn’t want me to put a space. Did your area’s postal code recently change?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Okay, I’ll try again.” *I try again, and nothing*

Customer: “You do know that when I say ‘oh’, it’s not a letter, right? It’s the number Zero.”

Me: “Yes, I know that. I’m putting in zeros.”

Customer: “Because ‘oh’ and zero aren’t the same thing. They may look the same, but they’re not.”

Me: “I know. I put in zeros.”

(I try again, but it still says it’s wrong.)

Me: *to an associate* “Can you put his postal code in? I keep trying with capitals, no capitals, spaces, no spaces, and it keeps telling me it’s wrong. I’ll bet you if someone else just does it, it’ll work.”

(My associate comes over and asks for the postal code.)

Me: “P, ‘oh,’ E, 5, Y ‘oh.'”

Customer: “They’re not ‘oh’s! They’re zeros! That’s why it’s not working!”

Associate: “I know they’re zeros, I know that postal codes are always letter-number-letter, number-letter,number.”

Customer: “But the computer doesn’t know that! The computer doesn’t know that you mean zero when you say ‘oh’!”

Me: “It doesn’t have to, because we’re not typing in ‘oh’s, we’re typing zeros. We’re just saying ‘oh’ because it’s easier. Everyone calls them ‘oh’s; even you did.”

(I tell my associate the postal code again, but I make sure to say ‘zero’ instead of ‘oh’ and when he types it in, it works.)

Me: “Thanks, I knew I just needed someone else to do it.”

Customer: “It’s because you were saying ‘oh’ the whole time! It’s not ‘oh’ it’s zero!”

(I wanted to smack him…)

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