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Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

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Time To Ship Them A Brain

| CA, USA | Extra Stupid

(I am a manager at a large retail chain store and am called over to the guest service desk to assist a customer.)

Customer: “I did an in-store pick up order but I didn’t know these items would be so big… Can I take them off the order?”

Me: “You would need to cancel your whole order and we can ring you up right now for the stuff you do want.”

Customer: “But online I got free shipping…”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “If I buy them here I won’t qualify for the free shipping…”

Me: “…?!”

(I give the guest a bewildered look and he looks back at me puzzled.)

Customer: “Do I have to pay for shipping now?”

Me: “You don’t pay shipping for in-store pick up, sir.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Yeah…”

Customer: “I don’t wanna risk it. I’ll just take the large items. No worries. Thanks!”

(Am I missing something?!)

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Doesn’t Have The Head For This Kind Of Work

| Buffalo, NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Popular

(I work as a dispatcher for my hometown.)

Me: “911, what’s your emergency?”

Caller: “My husband has been lying on the couch moaning in pain all day; I think he needs to go to the hospital. My address is [address].”

Me: “Okay, an ambulance is on the way. Did your husband eat anything unusual today?”

Caller: “No.”

Me: “Does he have any allergies?”

Caller: “No.”

Me: “Where did he say the pain is coming from?”

Caller: “I don’t know.”

Me: “Okay, but did he do anything unusual today that could cause his pain?”

Caller: “Um, well, he shot himself in the head this morning.”

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Give Them An Inch And They’ll Just Be Confused

| Sacramento, CA, USA | Extra Stupid

(I work for a salon furniture company and this customer has called in asking about the width of an item.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “Hi, I was calling about [Item]. What is the width? It says 46.5″ but how long is that exactly?”

Me: “The width is as listed. The 46.5 inch measurement is correct.”

Customer: “Yeah, but how long is that? How long is 46.5 inches? How long is that exactly?”

Me: “It is exactly 46.5 inches, sir. That is the exact measurement.”

Customer: “No, how long is that exactly? Like I know is says 46.5 but how long is that??”

Me: “It is just under 4 feet, sir.”

Customer: “Cool, that is all I needed to know. Could have said that the first time.”

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