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Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

The Birth Of Assumption

| East Falmouth, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Bizarre

(A guy comes in, buys his stuff by credit card, as I hand him his bags and receipt:)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

Customer: “What? The h*** did you know?”

Me: “Sir?”

Customer: “The f*** did you know it was my birthday? You see my ID in my wallet or something?”

Me: “Uh… sir? All I said was have a nice day.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “…”

Customer: “Not ‘Happy Birthday?'”

Me: *trying VERY hard not to smirk* “…No.”

Customer: “Well, this day’s off to a good start…”

Me: *smiling sympathetically* “Have a nice day, sir. And Happy Birthday.”

Wish You Could Hide From The Hyde

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | Bad Behavior, Bizarre

(I work at a popular family restaurant that has a fairly diverse clientèle. Two older ladies come in just as I start my shift. It happens to be a statutory holiday that the government created last year. As such it’s a day off for most people, but not a real holiday.)

Customer #1: “Good morning! Happy [Holiday]! ”

Me: “Happy [Holiday]. How are you today?”

Customer #1: “Everyone has just been so nice today. That young man-” *referring to our greeter* “-held the door open for us!”

Customer #2: *extremely aggressively*“As well he should!”

Me: *taken aback, I try to change the subject* “Can I get you something to drink to start you off?”

Customer #1: *beams at me* “I hope they’re paying you bonuses to come in on a holiday!”

Customer #2: *interrupts in a savage tone of voice* “What would it matter? They’re here all the time anyway!”

Customer #1: *gives a big smile to her companion then to me* “We’ll just have coffees for now.”

(I escaped gratefully and happened to catch the coworker I was relieving as she packed up.)

Me: “That table is like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde!”

Coworker: “Oh, they’re always like that. I was so glad when you came in that I wouldn’t have to deal with them this time. Good luck!”

Fairweather Fighters

| Varna, Bulgaria | Bad Behavior, Bizarre

(Two intoxicated patrons are trying to start a fight, when the owner of the rock club decides to stop them.)

Owner: “All right, break it up you two! There will be no fights in my club. If you want to fight – there’s the door. Take it outside!”

Patron: “But… It’s raining outside, bro!”