Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!


It’ll Be All Right, All Night

| Boston, MA, USA | Boston, MA, USA | Bizarre, Time

(I am doing a last walk-through at the library, picking up books and reminding patrons that it’s time to leave. I see an older gentleman sitting in an armchair in the corner, reading a newspaper.)

Me: “Sir, the library is closing now.”

Patron: *not looking up from newspaper* “That’s all right.”

(He makes no move to leave.)

Me: “The library is closing NOW.”

Patron: *making a soothing hand-patting motion in the air, but still not looking up* “That’s all right.”

Me: *deciding to try again* “Yes, but the library IS closing now.”

Patron: “Oh, that’s all right.”

Me: *loudly and firmly* “Actually, it’s not all right, because we need to shut off the lights and lock the doors, so we can all go home.”

Patron: “Oh! The library is closing now?”


It’s Going To Be One Of Those Bays

, | Orlando, FL, USA | Bizarre

(It is the last call of the night. The customer is in California.)

Customer: “You sound like you are from the Bay Area.”

Me: “That is funny, seeing I am on the other side of the country in Florida.”

Customer: “Of course, you sound like you are from there.”

Me: “From Florida?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “I don’t sound Spanish or country or like a snow bird.”

Customer: “No, but you sound middle-class.”

Me: “…”

Customer: “But it is my birthday; follow me on instagram.”


A Shocking Inaction At The Contraction

| Brisbane, QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Health & Body

(A heavily pregnant woman comes to the counter. She begins her order, but pauses to clutch her stomach while groaning. It is a Friday afternoon.)

Me: “Are you all right?”

Customer: “Yep, just having a contraction!”

Me: “Um…”

Customer: *resumes ordering, pauses to groan* “I have a pre-admission on Tuesday. She’d better wait til then!”

Me: “I don’t think your baby is gonna wait!”

Customer: “Oh, she will. It always takes forever. I have three other kids and they all took a few days.”

Me: *puts order together and hands it to her* “Well, good luck!”

Customer: *groans, clutches stomach* “Tuesday’s the day!”

Coworker: *after customer has left* “I bet we’ll see her on the news tonight having a baby in the car-park.”



| USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I work at a butchers shop. A young woman enters with a container.)

Woman: “Did you know none of your items are vegan?”

Me: “Yes…”

Woman: “If you want more vegan customers, you should sell some of my tofu loaf.”

(She hands me the container.)

Me: “Um, I don’t think I’m going to be getting a lot of vegan customers no matter what I sell.”

Woman: “That’s a shame. You’re losing the hipster customers, which makes up, like, 50% of customers.”

Me: “Okay, thanks…”

Woman: *suddenly shrieking* “SELL TOFU LOAF!”


Common Sense On A Diet

, | Chicago, IL, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(A few friends and I are in the car driving home from the city. We pull into [Fast Food Restaurant]. I pull up far enough for my friend in the back seat to order.)

Friend: “I’ll like a number five with no pickles and a [Soda #1], a number seven with a [Soda #2], two large fries, and a diet water.”

Person Taking Order:  “What was that last part?”

Friend: “Two large fries and a diet water.”

Person Taking Order:  “One moment, please.”

(The person taking the order forgets to mute his headset. We hear him asking another coworker if they carry diet water. His coworker starts laughing hysterically.)

Person Taking Order:  “Please pull up to the window”

(I pulled up to the window to see that the person that took the order was bright red and highly embarrassed for not realizing what he asked his coworker for. His coworker was still laughing hysterically and struggling to stand back up in the background. I tried my best not to laugh even though everyone in the car was in tears from laughing so much.)

Page 6/249First...45678...Last