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Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

As Clear As Glass

| Levittown, NY, USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid

Me: *working on the zone, organizing the wall of Windex bottles*

Guest: *walks up behind me* “Sir, can I ask you a question?”

Me: *I turn around, my back to the Windex* “Certainly.” *with as sincere as a smile as I can muster*

Guest: “Could you tell me where I could find the Windex?”

Me: *having had situations much like this, but the sheer absurdity of this caught me off guard as I silently point my thumb right behind me*

Bartering Bars At The Bar

| Norway | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Money

(I work as a bouncer in a pub and overhear the following while standing behind the bar.)

Girl: “One beer, please.”

Bartender: “That will be 86 kroner.”

(She puts her card in the terminal.)

Bartender: “The transaction was declined; do you have another card or cash?”

Girl: *pours out five nutria-bars from her purse* “Will this be enough?”

(Not surprisingly, I had to throw her out a few minutes later.)

Has A Pen-chant For Stabbing Motions

| Perth, WA, Australia | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Bizarre

(I’m a salesperson in the photography and IT industries. I like to ask questions to make sure I can recommend the right solution. It saves a lot of time for both me and the client and ensures that there are no nasty surprises later on. A man has asked me to provide some advice for a new computer & accessories for his wife.)

Customer: “Here’s a list of all the things my wife wants. Can you do all this?”

Me: “I’m sure we can help, sir. Let me look over the list and ask you a few questions to make sure I’ve covered everything”

(I review the list, which seems straight-forward, and ask a few questions to clarify the requirements. Things are progressing smoothly until we reach the installation part of the checklist.)

Customer: “So can you come out and set it all up?”

Me: “One of our technicians will be able to do that for you, sir, but please be aware that we charge $150/hour for this service.”

Customer: “I don’t care about the price, I just want to know if YOU can do it or not.”

Me: “Well, I personally can’t but one of our techs will definitely be able to provide that service.”

Customer: “What? I didn’t ask if YOU could do it.”

Me: “Sorry, I misunderstood what you meant, but yes, one of our techs can do the install.”

Customer: “I meant YOU as in the company, not YOU as an individual. You DO represent the company, don’t you?”

(During this conversation the client has been gesturing towards my face while holding a biro, emphasising his words with a stabbing motion. He is only standing 1m away from me so the pen is very close to my face.)

Me: “Sir, can you please stop pointing your pen at my face?”

Customer: “What? Don’t be silly. I’m NOT pointing it at you; I’m just talking!”

(He makes a stabbing motion at my face while saying this.)

Me: “Please stop stabbing your pen at me. I don’t like it.”

Customer: “What? Never mind, this is obviously too hard. Don’t worry about it. I’m going elsewhere!”

(I try to clear up the misunderstanding but he has gotten so worked up that he just storms off, muttering under his breath. Another customer, who is a regular, has seen and heard the whole exchange.)

Regular Customer: “I thought you were very polite! I was impressed that you were calm throughout that conversation.”

Me: “Thanks, [Regular Customer]. I appreciate that.”

Regular Customer: “What was his problem, exactly? Strange man.”

Me: “Who knows? Maybe he just doesn’t like being told not to do something.”