icon_crazyrequests

Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

Your Parking Skills Are Mud

| QC, Canada | Bizarre, Transportation

(I am working part time directing traffic in the parking lot. The parking lot is a small patch of paved lot, some gravel, but mostly dirt. Because of the season the dirt is actually mud.)

Customer: *pulls up in expensive Mercedes from inside the parking lot* “Excuse me, but are there any spots? I’ve been looking for 45 minutes.”

Me: “Half the parking lot is free.”

Customer: “But all the places left have mud.”

Me: “So? Your car is built for it.”

Customer: “But my wife is wearing [Fancy Shoe Brand].”

(The customer drives back into the parking lot to look for a space, and returns after a few minutes.)

Customer: “Hey, would it be any trouble if I park in that spot?” *points to handicap spot*

Me: “Only if you don’t mind being towed away.”

(Customer drove around for a few more minutes until a spot in the paved area opened. He and his wife walked into the restaurant, only to leave a few minutes later. Their reservation had past.)

Gunning For A Sale

| PA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Home Improvement

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How may I direct your call?”

Customer: “Yeah, I was calling to see if you sell bullets?”

Me: “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”

Customer: “Do you sell bullets? Like for reloading?”

Me: *thinking maybe he is confused and needs the ‘bullet’ CO2 cartridges we sell for some of our air-powered nailers* “Bullets… as in bullets for guns, or…?”

Customer: “Yes! Bullets! For shooting!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, we do not. We sell home improvement items and bullets are not a home improvement item.”

Customer: “…Are you sure?”

Not A Fan Of Your Coldness

| NB, Canada | Bizarre, Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging

(A guest approaches the front desk early in the morning to check out. I greet him.)

Me: “Good morning! Checking out, I see; what’s the room number?”

Customer: “It’s room 115.”

Me: “Wonderful, Mr. [Customer], and did you enjoy your stay?”

Customer: “No, I did not, and I think I should be compensated.”

Me: “Oh? I’m so sorry to hear that; what was the problem you had?”

Customer: “There was no heat in the room! I froze all bloody night and barely got any sleep. Why should I have to pay for a room with no heat in February?”

Me: “I’m so sorry to hear that, sir. I will definitely have this taken care of right away. I just need to know exactly what the problem was. Was the heater running but not producing heat? Was the temperature display on the wall not working?”

Customer: “Oh no, everything was working. I just didn’t have heat.”

Me: “I don’t understand. Did you turn on the heat and increase the temperature and it get any warmer?”

Customer: “Oh, I don’t know. I just pressed the button that said fan and a fan came on and it got cold so I went to bed.”

Me: “Okay… were you not able to turn the fan off or to turn the heat on?”

Customer: “I don’t know; I didn’t try.”

Me: “I see. Did you call the front desk to ask for assistance?”

Customer: “NO! I told you, I pressed the button that said fan, the fan came on and it got cold, so I just went to bed.”

Me: “So, let me see if I’ve got this straight. You slept in a room with a fully operational heater, you turned on the fan instead of the heater, made no attempts to correct your own error, and now you want a discount because you were cold.”

Customer: “Well, when you say it like that you make it sound like I’m an idiot.”