Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

Walking A Thin Line

| Boone, IA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

(I work as a cashier at a grocery store. A couple of customers, one male who is very flamboyant and a female, come through my line.)

Me: “How may I help you?”

Female Customer: “I would like two packs of [Brand] cigarettes.”

(The cigarettes are located at an express register a few lanes down from mine. I go get the cigarettes and come back.)

Me: “Will that be all today?”

Female Customer: “Can you get me two more packs? He wants to see you walk again.”

(I’ve never walked more stiff legged in my life.)

Taking The Long Route(r)

| Israel | Bigotry, Bizarre, Technology

(I work at the IT office in the city I live in. I’m female. I get a call from a city-funded kindergarten:)

Me: “IT office.”

Kindergarten Teacher: “Hi, we have a problem with the computer here. The Internet isn’t working.”

Me: “I see. Let’s see if there’s a way we can get this fixed over the phone, so you don’t have to wait for me to get to you.”

Kindergarten Teacher: “Look, is there no way you can just send someone over?”

Me: “I’m the person who usually goes out into the field. The reason I’m taking calls right now is that it’s still early in the morning, and no one else has arrived yet. These problems are very often easy to fix, and it would be a shame for you to wait until I got to you, only for me to restart your router, which you could easily do yourself and have Internet within minutes.”

Kindergarten Teacher: “But you don’t understand. We’re all women here, so we don’t know anything about computers. Just send one of the guys out. They’ll be able to fix it.”

(Having no words, I ended the call. The kicker is that I didn’t end up getting to that Kindergarten until hours later. Needless to say that all I did was restart the router, and they had Internet minutes later.)

Getting Under Your Skin

| USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

(I work at a popular makeup store doing people’s makeup and hair. A woman walks up to the counter and taps the table to get my attention.)

Me: “Hi! How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I need my makeup done for a date. I haven’t seen him in a while and I want to look different.”

Me: “What do you mean by different? ”

(I’m thinking that she means a hairstyle, so I begin to grab some of our booklets with the styles we offer.)

Customer: “Like your skin!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “What do you use to make it so brown? The tanning spray I use makes my skin look orange.”

Me: “This is my natural skin tone, ma’am.”

Customer: “Whatever, you don’t have to tell me. Just do my makeup. I don’t want to be late.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t do that.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Me: “I can’t change your natural skin tone; it’s not possible.”

Customer: “Fine! Screw you! If he doesn’t like how I look I’ll get you fired!”

Coworker: “Easy, Breezy, Colored girl.”

The Dessert Glass Is Half Empty

| CA, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

Customer: “What are these?”

Me: “They’re little glass desserts.”

Customer: “Oh… How do you eat a glass dessert?”

Me: “You… don’t.”

Should Have Been More Emily Blunt

| FL, USA | Bizarre, Funny Names

(I work in an area with a lot of retired folks, many of which have age-related hearing loss. This is usually more amusing than annoying, especially when it comes to giving my name.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. This is Emily. How may I help you?”

Customers: “Did you say Beverly/Stephanie/Ginger/Jessica/Elaine?”

Me: “Yes.”

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