Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!


Get A Handle On The Situation

| USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

Me: “What kind of bags for you today?”

Customer: “Uhh… one with handles”

Me: *bags groceries in plastic*

Customer: “I wanted my groceries in bags with handles.”

Me: “Sir… I am pretty sure what I am holding right now are handles.”


This Is Why Jurassic Park Is PG-13

| KY, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Popular

(I work in a store meant for little girls and I am known for striking up conversations with the kids. I am talking to a little girl who is about five and cute as can be, when this happens)

Me: “So what do you like to do?”

Girl: “I like to draw!”

Me: “Really! What’s your favorite thing to draw?”

Girl: “Dinosaurs… COVERED IN BLOOD!”


Will Get Indigestion From The Suggestion

| VA, USA | Awesome Customers, Bizarre

(I work at a mom-and-pop bakery. For some reason our manager decides it would be a good idea to add a suggestion box. These were some of the stranger suggestions we got…)

Suggestion #1: “Chipotle taco flavored cookies.”

Suggestion #2: “A rollerblading purple walrus mascot.”

Suggestion #3: *my personal favorite* “Extend the bakery and add a mini strip club where people can really take pleasure in their desserts…”


Barking Mad

| VA, USA | Bizarre

(I work in the back offices of a museum. While this area is technically not off limits to the public, I seldom see anyone other than coworkers because this section of the building only contains offices and classrooms. A jingling sound comes from hallway, followed by “yip! yip!”)

Me: *to myself* “What on earth was that?”

(An elderly woman carrying a small dog on a leash suddenly peers into my office.)

Woman: “Where can I mail this?”

Me: *staring at shock at the dog inside a museum* “I’m sorry, what?”

Woman: “This. Where can I mail this?” *waves a stamped envelope at me*

Me: “Um, at a post office?”

Woman: “Where’s that?”

Me: *still eyeing the dog* “Outside somewhere? This is an art museum.”

(With a “Humph!” the woman put the dog down and walked indignantly away. I still have no idea how she got that dog in there or why she thought she could mail a letter!)


Baked In The Bakery

| Berkeley, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Criminal & Illegal

(Two young men and one young woman walk into the store. They appear to be college-aged.)

Man #1: “So, these cupcakes are, like, really good, right?”

Me: “Yep! The owner bakes them herself using great ingredients.”

(They wander around the store for a minute. Suddenly, the other man pulls out a plastic container of marijuana.)

Man #2: “Man, smell this!”

Man #1: “Oh, s***, that is some great stuff.”

Woman: “Let me smell.”

(Since the container looks similar to that of the local dispensary, I decide a call to the police is uncalled for without more information, so I wait.)

Woman: *smelling the drugs* “Oh, wow, that’s really good!” *smiles at me* “One banana split cupcake, please!”

(As I get her the cupcake, I keep staring at the container of weed. The young men seem completely unfazed by this.)

Me: *ringing up the payment* “Have a great day!”

Man #1: *walking out, weed still visibly in hand* “Oh, we DEFINITELY will!”

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